National Guard, considering going AWOL

[4546]

What is the name of your state? tx

Alright, here's my situation. I signed up to be a medic, someone made a typo in my orders to basic, so I got sent home, and by the time they sorted it out, my medic slot was full. I stupidly accepted an infantry slot because I wanted to get basic out of the way so I could finish school. I made it through OSUT no problem, but then joined what I thought was a "volunteer" unit (special unit that supposedly only wanted highly qualified people). 12 hour commute each drill. My unit sent me to airborne, and I failed. I learned fast, I'm just not cut out for infantry. Ever since I got back, I have been treated like hell, and embarrassed publicly whenever they can manage it, and I have become suicidal. Twice now, I've come close to suicide, once directly before, and once directly after drill. I asked to transfer out of the unit. Too late, unit has upcoming mobilization. If I go on a deployment with these guys, I won't be coming back alive. I don't have enough money to get to drill in two days, and my team leader told me to "figure it out." I'm tired of this bull****, if I have to choose between paying back my enlistment bonus + an OTH discharge vs my life, I'll choose what's left of my life.

So my question is, where do I go from here? Should I call my 1SG and tell him what's up? Should I just disappear for a few months and then turn myself in? Or would it be quicker to fail a drug test? My family is in the US, I don't want to have to leave and never come back. If I do go AWOL, will I be facing jail time? Anyone gone through this before, or know how to answer any of my questions, I'd really appreciate it. Also please don't judge me... I've already done enough of that myself.

EDIT: Guess I should add. I'm well aware this isn't the army's fault, it's mine. I can't do this. I will get someone killed. I need to get out now, I'm sorry if that makes me a second-class citizen or whatever, but... I did what I could.

 

[thinid]

If you feel suicidal, you need to go to a medical professional or better yet, an Army Chaplin, right now.

I couldn’t find the contact information for the TARNG Chaplin’s office, but you can get it by calling your unit Readiness NCO and asking. The ARNG has many resources to help Soldiers who are experiencing mental health issues. This could include counseling and therapy, reassignment and medical discharge. It’s not something you can just claim though; you will have to be diagnosed. A Chaplin can assist you in getting this done and addressing your concerns.

Do NOT go AWOL or get a hot UA. These will not help in any way to fix the problems you are having and will create even more. Neither an AWOL nor a UA is an automatic discharge.

 

[Marine Seagull]

The squeaky wheel gets the oil.

What is the name of your state? tx

Alright, here's my situation. I signed up to be a medic, someone made a typo in my orders to basic, so I got sent home, and by the time they sorted it out, my medic slot was full. I stupidly accepted an infantry slot because I wanted to get basic out of the way so I could finish school. I made it through OSUT no problem, but then joined what I thought was a "volunteer" unit (special unit that supposedly only wanted highly qualified people). 12 hour commute each drill. My unit sent me to airborne, and I failed. I learned fast, I'm just not cut out for infantry. Ever since I got back, I have been treated like hell, and embarrassed publicly whenever they can manage it, and I have become suicidal. Twice now, I've come close to suicide, once directly before, and once directly after drill. I asked to transfer out of the unit. Too late, unit has upcoming mobilization. If I go on a deployment with these guys, I won't be coming back alive. I don't have enough money to get to drill in two days, and my team leader told me to "figure it out." I'm tired of this bull****, if I have to choose between paying back my enlistment bonus + an OTH discharge vs my life, I'll choose what's left of my life.

So my question is, where do I go from here? Should I call my 1SG and tell him what's up? Should I just disappear for a few months and then turn myself in? Or would it be quicker to fail a drug test? My family is in the US, I don't want to have to leave and never come back. If I do go AWOL, will I be facing jail time? Anyone gone through this before, or know how to answer any of my questions, I'd really appreciate it. Also please don't judge me... I've already done enough of that myself.

EDIT: Guess I should add. I'm well aware this isn't the army's fault, it's mine. I can't do this. I will get someone killed. I need to get out now, I'm sorry if that makes me a second-class citizen or whatever, but... I did what I could.

If the situation you’re in now is unbearable doing something illegal is not going to relieve your problems. If anything it just gives the military an opportunity to exert more power over you.

Not having enough money to get to drill is not an excuse for missing drill.

We see this all the time, people who won't communicate or ask anything of their commands for whatever reason. Yet they take the drastic step of going AWOL or killing themselves, not the best ideals.
The correct way to proceed would be to do anything other than what you suggested to this forum.
You need to request mast with your chain of command and inform them of the problems you’re having. If your chain of command is the problem, then you need to write a CO's eyes only letter.
If your command still refuses to help go higher, request mast goes all the way to the secretary of the branch of service concerned.

How about you fill out a formal complaint before you forfeit your life????????

How about you learn how to fill out a formal complaint before you forfeit your life?????


Not to be rude but.
Just to let you know I’m not feeling it with your post. I see an OTH in your future and then maybe suicide if you keep thinking the way you’re thinking now.
I doubt any of the other service members will endanger their careers to kill you. They may yell a lot to keep you from killing them and everybody else, especially if you display any unwillingness or lack of discipline.

 

[4546]

I see an OTH in your future and then maybe suicide

Probably right. Oh well... I can at least try. Gonna go talk to my pdoc tomorrow, and an army chaplain this weekend. Thanks

 

[Marine Seagull]

Probably right. Oh well... I can at least try. Gonna go talk to my pdoc tomorrow, and an army chaplain this weekend. Thanks

Have you told your family how your feeling? You should so it's not a shock to them. They could also maybe offer more support.
Maybe your parents could call your CO or your/their Congressman and get better results?
For sure you can write a letter to your Congressman explaining your predicament, I'm not saying they can make your command do anything but it can't hurt for them to know outside eyes are looking in.

If you say you’re suicidal and you have a plan and intent to your doctor, they will hospitalize you or put you on some sort of watch.
FYI: The first thing they do at the hospital is drug test you.
The Doctors at the Hospital aren’t playing so get ready for their assessment of you. If you go to the hospital you might come out with a diagnosis. I think maybe an axis 2 personality disorder, I'm just guessing here.

 

[ERAUPIKE]

What is the name of your state? tx

Alright, here's my situation. I signed up to be a medic, someone made a typo in my orders to basic, so I got sent home, and by the time they sorted it out, my medic slot was full. I stupidly accepted an infantry slot because I wanted to get basic out of the way so I could finish school. I made it through OSUT no problem, but then joined what I thought was a "volunteer" unit (special unit that supposedly only wanted highly qualified people). 12 hour commute each drill. My unit sent me to airborne, and I failed. I learned fast, I'm just not cut out for infantry. Ever since I got back, I have been treated like hell, and embarrassed publicly whenever they can manage it, and I have become suicidal. Twice now, I've come close to suicide, once directly before, and once directly after drill. I asked to transfer out of the unit. Too late, unit has upcoming mobilization. If I go on a deployment with these guys, I won't be coming back alive. I don't have enough money to get to drill in two days, and my team leader told me to "figure it out." I'm tired of this bull****, if I have to choose between paying back my enlistment bonus + an OTH discharge vs my life, I'll choose what's left of my life.

So my question is, where do I go from here? Should I call my 1SG and tell him what's up? Should I just disappear for a few months and then turn myself in? Or would it be quicker to fail a drug test? My family is in the US, I don't want to have to leave and never come back. If I do go AWOL, will I be facing jail time? Anyone gone through this before, or know how to answer any of my questions, I'd really appreciate it. Also please don't judge me... I've already done enough of that myself.

EDIT: Guess I should add. I'm well aware this isn't the army's fault, it's mine. I can't do this. I will get someone killed. I need to get out now, I'm sorry if that makes me a second-class citizen or whatever, but... I did what I could.

How are you going to pay back your bonus when you don't even have enough money to travel 100 miles?

 

[ERAUPIKE]

Have you told your family how your feeling? You should so it's not a shock to them. They could also maybe offer more support.

Have you learned the correct use of your and you're? The OP needs medical help not family support.

Maybe your parents could call your CO or your/their Congressman and get better results?

Maybe he can act like an adult too.

For sure you can write a letter to your Congressman explaining your predicament, I'm not saying they can make your command do anything but it can't hurt for them to know outside eyes are looking in.

Here is how that letter might look.

Dear congressman,

I am too scared to fulfill my voluntary duties as a member of the armed services. Will you get me out of this? I don't want to die. I don't have any money but I promise that I'll try real hard to pay back all the money I took last year. Thanks.

If you say you’re suicidal and you have a plan and intent to your doctor, they will hospitalize you or put you on some sort of watch.

This sentence doesn't make any sense but yes. The OP needs to go to a hospital.

FYI: The first thing they do at the hospital is drug test you.

Failing that drug test will be detrimental to your freedom and future.

The Doctors at the Hospital aren’t playing so get ready for their assessment of you. If you go to the hospital you might come out with a diagnosis. I think maybe an axis 2 personality disorder, I'm just guessing here.

Now you are diagnosing people with mental illness?