considered child molestation or not?

[sunset1818]

What is the name of your state? PA

I was wondering if this is considered child molestation or not. I was also wondering what I could do if it is?

Last Febuary, I was 17. I spent a weekend at a convention in a hotel in Virginia. I'm from PA myself and the guy is from NY.
He had already kissed me last New Years party. I was 17 and He was 31. At this convention, he shoved his tongue in my mouth without permission. There was an eye witness, my sister. He wouldn't let go of me for quite some time and I was too shocked and scared to do anything.

A few days after the convention I emailed him and told him what he had done wrong. He apologized profusely and I held him at arms length for some time.

By the time I was 18 we had made up and this past 6 months we dated and been sexual. Recently, we got into a huge fight and he has abruptly decided to leave my life. I've now figured out, he used me for my body and that was it.

I don't want him to do this to another young girl, maybe younger than myself. I want to know if what he did was illegal.
When I was younger I was told anyone who had sex with you, even consensually- if you were under 18 and they were at least 4 years old was considered child molestation.
This wasn't sex. But I was underage and was not willing to kiss him.

Is there anything I can do a year later?

thank you,
Julie

 

[stephenk]

you can file a report with your local police department. be ready to explain why you are now reporting the crime only after you broke up with him.

 

[HomeGuru]

May be the write should explain it here anyway.

 

[hmmbrdzz]

You definitely need to practice explaining that here and probably before you take this somewhere else. If you can't explain why you've waited this long to report it (and can't take the subsequent "questioning" you might get here) you need to know you could be in for a whole lot of stress and embarrassment at a pretty critical time in your life trying to prove what he did was "illegal". I'm not saying what he did was OK, but you do need to consider your reasoning for reporting this, which -- at your age -- reasoning is hard to come by sometimes. There will be consequences for you if you report this and don't know why you're doing it. He is out of your life, apparently, so you aren't in harm's way anymore with respect to him. Slow down and think and tell us again why you want to report this.


hmmbrdzz

 

[franklin2003]

I've now figured out, he used me for my body and that was it. --------

We men know the difference between a women who are worth only a quick lay, and a woman who are worth marrying.

The sooner you figure this out the better a woman you will become, and a better class of man you will attract.

Hint>>> No decent woman would go out with a guy that old at 17!

 

[Mac35]

?

quote
By the time I was 18 we had made up and this past 6 months we dated and been sexual. Recently, we got into a huge fight and he has abruptly decided to leave my life. I've now figured out, he used me for my body and that was it. (quote)






why would you have sex with this guy if you thought it was wrong?

 

[mailman16]

I read the Q & A's in the forum 2 or 3 times a week and until now, I have never felt such an overwhelming urge to reply, so here goes:
Sunset1818 did state why she waited so long to report the 'crime'!! She wants to protect other young women from this monster! I do think though, that a better way to state it would've been: "he used me and then dumped me, and now I want to make him pay!" I'm begging you Sunset1818 to enlighten us all in proving your motivation is nothing more than selfish by answering two questions:
1. If you were so "shocked and scared" at the time you were 17, why, with the your sister as a witness no less, did you not report it when it happened?
2. If you were truly "shocked and scared", why would you ever dream of having a sexual relationship with this man let alone being anywhere near him?
Don't misconstrue my position, as I wholeheartedly believe what he did was wrong, but as anyone could plainly see, this seems to be nothing more than a thinly veiled attempt to seek revenge.

Sorry, that was neither legal advice nor even helpful advice, but I couldn't resist.

 

[PerfidyorFealty]

You don't care if he does something like this to some other underaged girl, you just want revenge. It doesn't sound like he molested you anyway. Get over it and move on. Quit trying to be vindictive just because he doesn't want you anymore.

 

[djprice]

ummmm....17?

uh, in most states you were at what they call "age of consent" Canada is 14, NY 17, GA, 17, FL 17 etc... You voluntarily had relations with this guy, and your choice of mates was obviously a poor one. He was not a good role model for sure, but you are S.O.L., the only thing you might have been able to hit him with WAS statutory rape, but there again you were 17, no DFCS program would touch that one, they have bigger fish to fry.
( Assuming they really do anything except sit on their damn asses and collect a check) so forget it.

 

[hmmbrdzz]

Re: ummmm....17?

DJprice: Are you maxim? I mean franklin?

hmmbrdzz

uh, in most states you were at what they call "age of consent" Canada is 14, NY 17, GA, 17, FL 17 etc... You voluntarily had relations with this guy, and your choice of mates was obviously a poor one. He was not a good role model for sure, but you are S.O.L., the only thing you might have been able to hit him with WAS statutory rape, but there again you were 17, no DFCS program would touch that one, they have bigger fish to fry.
( Assuming they really do anything except sit on their damn asses and collect a check) so forget it.

 

[djprice]

WHO ???????

Who ?