domestic dispute

[not_u25]

What is the name of your state?I need help. I'm from nj and I was wondering if there always has to be an arrest when a domestic dipute call is placed to the police by a third party. I was wondering this because my boyfriend and i had a small argument. someone saw us and called the police reporting a domestic dispute. We were only having a disagreement and i don't want to press charges. I didn't even think of calling the police because it was just a small argument with no violence involved. unfortunately the call was placed by someone else and the police, who my bf contacted on his own to find out information, told him he would recieve a letter from them. will he be arrested for this? and is there anything that can be done so that he doesn't get arrested?

 

[stephenk]

if he didn't hit you or assault you he has nothing to worry about.

Where were you having this "small argument", out in the middle of the street?

 

[not_u25]

well yeah unfortunately we were in the parking lot of a hotel place. but we didn't yell, although we did raise our voices a bit but it was only for a few seconds. we spoke in a regular tone for most of the time. but yeah there was no hitting at all. we would never do that. it was only a small disagreement.

 

[stephenk]

Sure it was. That's why a complete stranger called the police to report you and your boyfriend talking reasonably to each other.

 

[abaga]

well yeah unfortunately we were in the parking lot of a hotel place. but we didn't yell, although we did raise our voices a bit but it was only for a few seconds. we spoke in a regular tone for most of the time. but yeah there was no hitting at all. we would never do that. it was only a small disagreement.

You didn't yell, but did raise your voice for only for a few seconds. Sit and count to three....that isn't long enough for more than one word to come out of your mouth.

Personally, I'd thank the person that called the police to protect you! Many women, and even men, will say it was nothing, when in reality, they are trying to protect the person that is abusing them...for whatever reason they are protecting, they are. The person that called the police was trying to help YOU. Thank them!

 

[not_u25]

no they weren't trying to protect me they were probably trying to protect themselves. and duh i meant like a few seconds you can say more than 2 words in 20 seconds or so. the person that called was the hotel manager or someone that worked at the hotel. they were probably watching us and so saw us when we did get upset and thought we were still out there because we were still mad but by the time the lady came out to talk to us we were both just sitting. i was waiting for him to get in the room and he wanted to be out in his car for a bit because the ppl next door kept looking in his car. She didn't want us in the parking lot so that's why she got mad. i don't blame her so i didn't give her any trouble and said sure i'll go to the office and return the key. If she really thought i was in danger she would have called the cops before that but she didn't, probably because the ppl next door were having a nice loud drinking get-together outside in the parking lot(funny they didn't get the police called on them). And no that's not a place we like to go. we had to do something in the morning and the location of the hotel was good for us. so anyway after i handed in the key my bf asked if we could at least get a part of our money back (i didn't care though because part of the reason i was out in that parking lot was because i wanted to go give the key and leave that place). The lady said no with an attitude and my bf said ok, "that's nice" or something like that and she said "i'm calling the cops"(she probably thought that would scare us off so we wouldn't bother her for our money, not that we did). we just said fine. So he came out with me to the car and called the police to find out if there had been a call made from the motel. the police told him no there was no call. then the other worker called him into the office because he could see us in the car from the glass office door. my bf walked inside to see what he wanted and the man asked him to get off the phone in a really rude manner. my bf said to wait because he couldn't hang up on the police but the man yelled at him to hang up again and then picked his phone and said "i'm calling the cops". we left still talking to the police and then he called again to find out some information and they told him that they now had received a "domestic dispute" call. So it doesn't make sense that they thought i was gonna get hurt, or that we were too loud or that they were worried about either of us. They only called the police after they were upset that we called. So, sorry but no we're not an abusive couple and there's no drama. I would never stay with anyone who'd put a hand on me or abused me verbally, nor would i expect anyone to stay with me if i acted in that manner. We did not have a shouting match. We just got a bit loud. if you've been in a relationship you've probably had arguments before and know what i mean. unfortunately for us we happen to make the mistake to do it in a parking lot(of a crappy hotel who lets ppl drink in public, and roam around other ppl's cars looking into them, and has women waiting by open room doors while these guys with alcohol walk in and out of the room). i don't think my bf deserves to go to jail for that.