B
beccad
Guest
We are from Illinois. Husband was arrested for domestic battery (I was the victim). I would like to have the charges dropped. How would I go about doing that?
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even if you decide not to cooperate, the prosecutor can and mostly likely will proceed with the case.
The prosecutor can use the reporting police officers as witnesses, the 911 tape, neighbors who heard and saw what happened, etc.
You deciding to recant can also be explained to the jury as part of the cycle of domestic violence and part of battered woman's syndrome.
you called the police and had him arrested for a reason. That reason is still valid so cooperate with the prosecution. Dont believe your hubby when he says he changed and it was all a mistake so please drop the charges. He is desperate because of the charges hanging over him, not because he really cares about you.
The prosecutor can use the reporting police officers as witnesses, the 911 tape, neighbors who heard and saw what happened, etc.
You deciding to recant can also be explained to the jury as part of the cycle of domestic violence and part of battered woman's syndrome.
you called the police and had him arrested for a reason. That reason is still valid so cooperate with the prosecution. Dont believe your hubby when he says he changed and it was all a mistake so please drop the charges. He is desperate because of the charges hanging over him, not because he really cares about you.
A
angel64
Guest
If I were you I would NOT drop them because what is going to happen is he will get out and do the same thing again,again,again and the D.A. will get tired of you dropping the charges that they will not longer give them a second look and then where will you be?
StickyFingers
Member
Why in-the-world would you want to drop the charges?
That line of BS about how: "It was a mistake", "I didn't mean too", "I'm sorry", "It will never happen again", I don't know what happened,I lost control", "I was drunk...I didn't know what I was doing". IT is the typical excuses for wife beating pieces of crap!
I should know I was in that situation.
Also, don't fall for the flowers, gifts, candy, and special nights out on the town. IT IS ALL BULL!!!
PLEASE listen to these people who have taken the time out to reply to you. As some have already said, It probably wouldn't matter if you recanted your statement, Look at his paperwork..Does it say the STATE VS HUSBAND? Was there any photos taken of injuries? Did your neighbors hear it? Was there children present or anyone else there when it happened?
GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN!!!!!!
That line of BS about how: "It was a mistake", "I didn't mean too", "I'm sorry", "It will never happen again", I don't know what happened,I lost control", "I was drunk...I didn't know what I was doing". IT is the typical excuses for wife beating pieces of crap!
I should know I was in that situation.
Also, don't fall for the flowers, gifts, candy, and special nights out on the town. IT IS ALL BULL!!!
PLEASE listen to these people who have taken the time out to reply to you. As some have already said, It probably wouldn't matter if you recanted your statement, Look at his paperwork..Does it say the STATE VS HUSBAND? Was there any photos taken of injuries? Did your neighbors hear it? Was there children present or anyone else there when it happened?
GET OUT WHILE YOU CAN!!!!!!
7
757driver
Guest
Domestic violence/battery
I think you might want to take this advice...and no I'm not a lawyer but I DO have FIRST-HAND experience in this type of case because it happened to me.
First of all, why do you want to reconcile with this man? Has he done this kind of thing before, is there a history? Yes, statistics show that the majority of abused victims are women BUT IT ALSO HAPPENS TO MEN and that is very rarely reported or believed. It is also a fact.
I noticed virtually every lawyer on this thread has given the time-tested statement that he will do this again. While there is, of course, no guarantee like there are no guarantees in life, it is a stereotypical answer. Think about it this way, they have to cover their asses - the arresting police officer, attorneys and the judicial system and that is precisely what they are doing.
Now on to my situation and what happened. My wife called the police on me last year after a "fight" basically, pushing & shoving (not going into details how or why). I was injuried slightly but the police were only interested in what she had to say, not me. I was arrested and spent 3 DAYS IN JAIL before a friend could bail me out. Also, I had a restraining order against me. After two weeks when I filed for divorce, she recanted saying "she only meant to scare me, did not realize I would get arrested & did not want to wreck a 12-year-old marriage without trying". So...when we got rid of the lawyers, EVERYTHING went much smoother. I asked my attorney to have the RO dissolved on the grounds of false statements (my wife even knew the original judge personally) but he just sat on my request and did nothing. So, I put in a motion for this as was my legal right and appeared in Family Court with my wife who clearly, did not oppose it. The order was dismissed in less than a minute and the judge actually COMMENDED us for doing a 180.
The criminal case was going to be harder because in most states, the city ALWAYS prosecutes, not the alleged victim. In my case, because there were so many loopholes and my attorney was not exactly Perry Mason, a deal was struck in court (no, not a plea bargain - DO NOT DO THAT!) but an adjudication. My wife asked me if I was going to return home that she would like me to do anger mangement classes. On my own initiative and because I wanted to make a go of the marriage - not because I was most likely going to be court ordered - I started classes 2 months BEFORE my first court appearance for which I pled "not guilty".
Later on my attorney changed his tune when my wife was subpoenaed to appear as a witness for the prosecution and she could NOT plead the 5th amendment even if she wanted to. The law is set up that way in these type of cases! However, since ours was NOT a typical case and the judge could see that, the agreement was to continue with the classes, stay out of "trouble" for 4 months, pay a reduced fine and then the charge would be dismissed. I went through hell doing all this but because we BOTH made mistakes and I love my wife we went through it together. In the end I fired my attorney - he really was a joke (sorry you hot shots out there but there ARE bad apples in every cart, as you know).
The final result a few weeks ago when my wife and I both appeared in court was the charge was dropped and the case dismissed! And it took 7 months to get to this final result and be able to get on with our lives. The law CAN get it wrounf sometimes, don't believe because a lawyer gives you advice that it is going to be either correct or in your interests! If you need a doctor or mechanic, some people shop around or ask for a second opinion, so should you but be VERY careful and think things through before you act or sign anything.
In our experience, things worked out on those occasions when neither one of us had any attorney representing us, strange as that may sound but true.
Only you can answer the questions I asked earlier and only you know what this person is like. For me, it was a situational thing, she abused me too but knew how to work the system, I did not.
And for you doubting attorneys, this was my FIRST ever arrest in any country for anything. Previously, I have never even gotten a parking ticket and then because of a mistake on both our parts, the law got involved and almost ruined our lives. So there can be a happy ending, it does not have to go down the inevitable road that most people will tell you it will go. Think carefully and good luck. Of course, YOU could not show up in court then they would not have a case. However, you are probably going to be subpoenaed.
I AM NOT GUILTY, FINALLY!
I think you might want to take this advice...and no I'm not a lawyer but I DO have FIRST-HAND experience in this type of case because it happened to me.
First of all, why do you want to reconcile with this man? Has he done this kind of thing before, is there a history? Yes, statistics show that the majority of abused victims are women BUT IT ALSO HAPPENS TO MEN and that is very rarely reported or believed. It is also a fact.
I noticed virtually every lawyer on this thread has given the time-tested statement that he will do this again. While there is, of course, no guarantee like there are no guarantees in life, it is a stereotypical answer. Think about it this way, they have to cover their asses - the arresting police officer, attorneys and the judicial system and that is precisely what they are doing.
Now on to my situation and what happened. My wife called the police on me last year after a "fight" basically, pushing & shoving (not going into details how or why). I was injuried slightly but the police were only interested in what she had to say, not me. I was arrested and spent 3 DAYS IN JAIL before a friend could bail me out. Also, I had a restraining order against me. After two weeks when I filed for divorce, she recanted saying "she only meant to scare me, did not realize I would get arrested & did not want to wreck a 12-year-old marriage without trying". So...when we got rid of the lawyers, EVERYTHING went much smoother. I asked my attorney to have the RO dissolved on the grounds of false statements (my wife even knew the original judge personally) but he just sat on my request and did nothing. So, I put in a motion for this as was my legal right and appeared in Family Court with my wife who clearly, did not oppose it. The order was dismissed in less than a minute and the judge actually COMMENDED us for doing a 180.
The criminal case was going to be harder because in most states, the city ALWAYS prosecutes, not the alleged victim. In my case, because there were so many loopholes and my attorney was not exactly Perry Mason, a deal was struck in court (no, not a plea bargain - DO NOT DO THAT!) but an adjudication. My wife asked me if I was going to return home that she would like me to do anger mangement classes. On my own initiative and because I wanted to make a go of the marriage - not because I was most likely going to be court ordered - I started classes 2 months BEFORE my first court appearance for which I pled "not guilty".
Later on my attorney changed his tune when my wife was subpoenaed to appear as a witness for the prosecution and she could NOT plead the 5th amendment even if she wanted to. The law is set up that way in these type of cases! However, since ours was NOT a typical case and the judge could see that, the agreement was to continue with the classes, stay out of "trouble" for 4 months, pay a reduced fine and then the charge would be dismissed. I went through hell doing all this but because we BOTH made mistakes and I love my wife we went through it together. In the end I fired my attorney - he really was a joke (sorry you hot shots out there but there ARE bad apples in every cart, as you know).
The final result a few weeks ago when my wife and I both appeared in court was the charge was dropped and the case dismissed! And it took 7 months to get to this final result and be able to get on with our lives. The law CAN get it wrounf sometimes, don't believe because a lawyer gives you advice that it is going to be either correct or in your interests! If you need a doctor or mechanic, some people shop around or ask for a second opinion, so should you but be VERY careful and think things through before you act or sign anything.
In our experience, things worked out on those occasions when neither one of us had any attorney representing us, strange as that may sound but true.
Only you can answer the questions I asked earlier and only you know what this person is like. For me, it was a situational thing, she abused me too but knew how to work the system, I did not.
And for you doubting attorneys, this was my FIRST ever arrest in any country for anything. Previously, I have never even gotten a parking ticket and then because of a mistake on both our parts, the law got involved and almost ruined our lives. So there can be a happy ending, it does not have to go down the inevitable road that most people will tell you it will go. Think carefully and good luck. Of course, YOU could not show up in court then they would not have a case. However, you are probably going to be subpoenaed.
I AM NOT GUILTY, FINALLY!
B
beccad
Guest
Thank you for sharing your experience. It sounds quite similar to what happened to us. When the police were at our house, I couldn't remember what all happened that led up to being hit. I've spent much time thinking about it and trying to remember all of the details and I am sure that my husband said something mean to me, so I slapped him. That, of course, does not excuse what he did, but I cannot let him take all of the blame for this. Also, I didn't know what it was that the police had given me to sign. I never wanted to press charges in the first place, but it wasn't explained to me that that's what I was doing when I signed the complaint. I have spoken with the State's Attorney and he had me sign an affidavit requesting that the charges be dropped. I will find out this week what they intend to do. As for now, we have already begun counseling, separately and together. Anyways, thanks for your advice.
7
757driver
Guest
beccad
Glad you are @ least getting counseling. You DO need professional help to sort out the quagmire. But take heart, not all is lost. If you would like to talk about this more, I would be happy to do likewise. If so, give me yr personal home email address and we can take it from there.
Like I mentioned previously, each state is different and each situation is unique and I am NOT an attorney. but I am a professional and honest person. Having been in this situation myself and gotten out of it, I think it highly likely that you are going to get more and better info from me. And I don't charge!
What you then decide to do is really up to you, all I can do is share an experience with you and tell you what we did to resolve it in our favor and get away from the legal system which, like many other things, does not always get it right. The difference is, that sometimes, innocent people get caught up in it and it is very difficult to unravel. Let me know what you want to do, if I can help further, I will.
___________________________________________________
Definition of a Jury: a group of fellow citizens who decide which side has the most convincing attorney!
Glad you are @ least getting counseling. You DO need professional help to sort out the quagmire. But take heart, not all is lost. If you would like to talk about this more, I would be happy to do likewise. If so, give me yr personal home email address and we can take it from there.
Like I mentioned previously, each state is different and each situation is unique and I am NOT an attorney. but I am a professional and honest person. Having been in this situation myself and gotten out of it, I think it highly likely that you are going to get more and better info from me. And I don't charge!
What you then decide to do is really up to you, all I can do is share an experience with you and tell you what we did to resolve it in our favor and get away from the legal system which, like many other things, does not always get it right. The difference is, that sometimes, innocent people get caught up in it and it is very difficult to unravel. Let me know what you want to do, if I can help further, I will.
___________________________________________________
Definition of a Jury: a group of fellow citizens who decide which side has the most convincing attorney!
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