drugs and stolen property...

[fnyrascal]

I don't have a clue what to do! My 16 YO son is out of control. His father, with whom he was living until 1 month ago cam to live with me fulltime. The custody and everything is being transferred. His father made a decision, on an ultimatum from his current wife. He had to go or she would. She has no children and at 16 he is tough to live with.
Anyway...I have found a homemade bong in the car, in which when questioned, he says is his friends. He no longer is allowed to "hang" with him. I searched his room after seeing this and found about $1000 dollars of stolen electronics. I traced it to a neighbor, roughly 1 mile away. This guy didn't even know it was missing. He had it in a home that was in the process of being built along with phones,computors and cameras. These kids only stole the boxed items and then stored some at my house in his room. I went ballistic. I made him take the stuff back to him and give it back. He swore he didn't do it, but I came to find out he did along with his buddies. I work grave-yard shift and can't babysit him. I don't have a choice of work shifts unfortunately. I told him and his friends I would call the cops next time so they are lucky. tonight, I came to work and found out that as soon as I left, he lit up a bowl and smoked it in my livingroom. I don't know what to do without getting myself in trouble too. I want the cops to catch him and maybe let him sit in Juvenile Detention for a couple of weeks but how do I do this? If anyone can help, I would appreciate it. I know I can't control him, but not in my house.

 

[calatty]

In my opinion, using the juvenile justice system to control your kid is not the way to go, though it might be easier than other methods. By locking him up with other delinquents, you just make him worse. You also give him a criminal record. There are alternatives, such as counseling, wilderness programs, miliitary or other boarding schools.

 

[fnyrascal]

thanks

I don't want to give him a record but so far he has stolen the neighbors car at 14, Acura Legend(brand new!), no charges were pressed, now $1500 dollars in electronics, no charges pressed so far...smoking pot in myhouse and leaving paraphenalia in my car. I do not want to lose everything I have worked so hard to get. A nice home a stable environment just because he is "experimenting!" I am checking on "At Risk Youth" in Washington State. He has refused counseling and won't even be straight with me about what has happened so far. I can't have him there to ruin the rest of this family if this is what he is going to continue to do. I have to try and salvage something.