International harassment

[Enderdude17]

Hello. I'm writing this on the behalf of my friend. She lives in Texas, and has been involved in a relationship with a man in the United Kingdom. He sends her expensive gifts and such, but it's an abusive relationship and she wants to get out, but has no clue how. I told her to send back all the gifts he bought her, to start, and to end all contact with him. However he has threatened to fly there if "he has to", as he knows her address. She's incredibly scared, and he says his British citizen ship will protect him from prosecution. I did some research on Diplomatic immunity and it didn't say much about tourism law. I want to know if she can call the police on him if he arrives at her house and attempts contact, which I believe is harassment and stalking. Can the police do anything about him ? I highly doubt he can just do whatever he wants so long as he doesn't hurt anyone. Please help, I'm really worried about her. It's a scary time. (Also looking into restraining orders for him)

 

[quincy]

Hello. I'm writing this on the behalf of my friend. She lives in Texas, and has been involved in a relationship with a man in the United Kingdom. He sends her expensive gifts and such, but it's an abusive relationship and she wants to get out, but has no clue how. I told her to send back all the gifts he bought her, to start, and to end all contact with him. However he has threatened to fly there if "he has to", as he knows her address. She's incredibly scared, and he says his British citizen ship will protect him from prosecution. I did some research on Diplomatic immunity and it didn't say much about tourism law. I want to know if she can call the police on him if he arrives at her house and attempts contact, which I believe is harassment and stalking. Can the police do anything about him ? I highly doubt he can just do whatever he wants so long as he doesn't hurt anyone. Please help, I'm really worried about her. It's a scary time. (Also looking into restraining orders for him)

How is it an "abusive" relationship? He lives in a different country.

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

Restraining orders in Texas are ridiculously easy to obtain. That said, her first response should be to make a local police report, then cut off all contact via email, utilizing a spam folder to direct his correspondence to and blocking any phone calls or texts. At that point, if he circumvents her attempts to cut off his threats and contact, she should see about obtaining one. Diplomatic Immunity can be problematic and if she obtains an order, she should call the appropriate embassy to inform them of the order and send them a copy of it. By accepting gifts, she appears to have led him on and should return all of them as the first step.

 

[davew128]

And what is it your friend isn't telling you? End the relationship, stop contact, and in the unlikely but not impossible event such a man flies from the UK to Texas, remind him that in Texas its perfectly acceptable to drop an unwelcome visitor who refuses to leave. Oh, and Adele is fat.

 

[quincy]

Restraining orders in Texas are ridiculously easy to obtain. That said, her first response should be to make a local police report, then cut off all contact via email, utilizing a spam folder to direct his correspondence to and blocking any phone calls or texts. At that point, if he circumvents her attempts to cut off his threats and contact, she should see about obtaining one. ...

Getting a restraining order in Texas against a resident of the UK is not exactly "ridiculously easy" - but a restraining order can be looked into if the UK resident comes to the US and the Texas woman has enough to support its issuance. OHRoadwarrior's other suggestions are good ones.

What might be of more help than reporting the UK man to Texas police is to report the man to UK authorities who can deal with him there. This would be if the woman in Texas feels she is being stalked online by the man in the UK and would also depend on all sorts of facts and factors about the abuse and relationship not disclosed in the original post.

Following are some links to UK resources. Calling their National Stalking Hotline can perhaps provide the woman in Texas with some avenues to explore to help her get relief from the continued unwanted contact by the UK man.

Protection Against Stalking: http://www.protectionagainststalking.org/node/11
SupportLine: http://www.supportline.org.uk/problems/stalking.php
UK National Stalking Helpline: http://www.stalkinghelpline.org/

And here is a US Department of Justice link with additional resources: http://www.justice.gov/ovw/stalking

Reports can be made if the contact by the UK man is unwanted and the woman has made it clear to the man that continued contact is unwanted, and he continues to contact her despite this - or if at any time she fears for her safety.

 

[HighwayMan]

I did some research on Diplomatic immunity...

Why? Is this individual a diplomat? If not, why would you think that Joe Blow off the street has diplomatic immunity just because he is from another country?

 

[OHRoadwarrior]

I am aware of TX issuing restraining orders against people living in other states. As I said, they tend to be liberal. Unless you ask, you will never find out.

 

[CdwJava]

Of course, such an order would be wholly unenforceable. But, she can try and take one out if she wants ... service might be VERY, VERY pricey!

As others have stated, she should return the gifts and cut off all contact with him. *IF* he should come to Texas, then maybe a restraining order cna be enforced. Until then, it's academic and not realistic.

 

[CavemanLawyer]

I would have to say there is literally a zero chance you could get a restraining order against a UK citizen under these circumstances. A violation of a restraining order is a civil matter anyway and won't do her much good if the guy is actually potentially violent. What she would need is a protective order which requires family violence, which requires that they be in a dating relationship. Not sure that their online or telephone relationship would count as dating. It'd be an interesting legal issue I think but ultimately a pretty pointless endeavor because you'd have to wait until he entered US jurisdiction before you could legally serve him.

If this guy has truly made credible threats against her than quincy is dead on in suggesting that the proper authorities to contact are in the UK. They are the only ones that have jurisdiction to do anything to him until he actually comes to Texas, or at least into the United States. In the meantime she should make it clear that she doesn't want any further contact with him and that he is on notice that he is not welcome at her home. That way if he were to actually come to her residence the police could arrest him on the spot for criminal trespass. Once in custody THEN she'd have a good shot at getting a protective order, or getting charges filed for harassment (misd.) or possibly even stalking (felony.) All of this, however, depends entirely on the nature of the communications he has already sent her.

There is zero indication that diplomatic immunity would apply to this guy and the fact that he is saying this sure makes me think he if full of it completely and that he's bluffing about flying halfway around the world to confront a woman that he has never met in person.