juvenile questions

[whitsmom]

We are in FL. My step son has been arrested twice...he is only 13. He was arrested at 10 for hitting a teacher, he did some juvenile type probation, but basically it was a slap on the wrist. He has a history of being violent with his younger sisters at home. He has been on some sort of medicine for ADHD and "oppositional defiant disorder" since age 3. He moved in with us 2 years ago because mom couldn't take it any more. He has since been suspended from school 8 or so times and was arrested again last year for refusing to take the standardized "FCAT" test. He has violated his probation three or four times (non-violent things like breaking the rules at home and getting referrals at school.) He has been in some sort of counceling most of his life and was just discharged from anger management. He is very good at "talking the talk". We recently had a psychological eval done at a teaching hospital and were told he has not physiological or pshych problems causing this behavior (other than the ADHD/ODD that we knew of).

He was just in court 3 weeks ago about his last violation, for which he was put on house arrest. Thursday we found out he has been stealing from us, lying about going straight to school (I drop him off and he leaves but always makes it back in time for school to start.) He has also been physically abusing my two daughters...trying to pass it off as "just playing." I just found out about this because he has threatened my daughters that if they tell he will hurt them or have someone else hurt them. One of them finally told. His bio mom has been pretty much non-existant until the last month for the two years he lived with us.

His probation officer thinks because of his age, he will not ever be sentanced to anything like a boy's ranch or boot camp...but he is going down hill fast.

Questions:
1.Does anyone know if there are any programs in FL (central) for juvenile offenders....like a boot camp or a live in situation...the out patient things aren't doing any good. He can be a great kid and I am scared to death that he will end up in prison if he doesn't change his ways. But at the same time, I don't want to endanger the other children who live here while he is being "rehabilitated."

2.When we go to his violtion hearing, does what his dad or I have to say have any bearing on his punishment...if so...what can we ask for? Counceling and probation and curfew and grounding and taking away all his priveledges don't help. He has been a hand full all his life. Any suggestions.

 

[bellestar]

This may sound crazy, and I am not trying to be funny. But if there is no type of punishment the courts due. Call a talk show. Like Sally Jessy Raphel show she has done alot of shows and will be able to give you some answers. She works closely with troublesome teens and knows of boot camps. Maybe she can help.... I dont want you to think I am being funny or trying to make fun of your situation but I have watched her shows and she is pretty tough on bad ass kids.... good luck keep us informed....

 

[whitsmom]

You know, I was thinking of that myself. The problem with the juvy system down here is that if the parents want to place the child into a program to help him and a court doesn't order it...the child has the right to leave any time he wants to because it is "voluntary" placement...on the child's part not the parents. We have tried everything you can think of...like I said from counceling to psych evals to you name it...he just keeps on messing up. It scares me to death that one of these days he will be 18 and one of these "little things" like beating up on girls and making threats will land him in prison if he doesn't pay for it now. We don't do corporal punishment...that is probably exactly what he needs, but what will beating his but teach him about doing it to others? I'm at a loss...thanks for the reply...anyone else have anything to suggest...I'm open to anything...