Lewdness - Indecent Exposure

[VER0N1CA]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? NEW JERSEY

On Jan 28 of this year (a non school day in East Brunswick due to snow), our across the street neighbor, came out of his house, walked to the sidewalk, took out his penis, put his hands on his hips and exposed his genitals openly while facing our house that has 4 big picture windows in the front and which are always open during the day, then after a while, he started to urinate. My husband and our daughter who is 9 years old, where getting ready to go out and fortunately my husband was looking through one of the picture windows when he saw our neighbor exposing his genitals and was able to stop our daughter just on time before she burst through the front door.

My husband then tried to approach him but the guy run to his car and left very quickly. We called the police and filed a report. A couple of detectives came a few weeks later and went over my husband’s testimony. As far as I know the police tried to get in touch with our neighbor several times without any success and just a couple of weeks ago, we received a court notice where my husband was summoned to serve as a witness on May 16 (yesterday). Yesterday my husband and I went to court as mandated and the prosecutor told us, that just because we didn't like what our neighbor did, it does not make it illegal. Then he went on and on, trying to convince us that:
1. We should have never brought this to court because is not illegal.
2. That the most our neighbor could get was a fine.
3. (After consulting with our neighbor’s lawyer) He said the best way to go, was to let our neighbor plead non-guilty and leave with a 6 months probation with the incentive that if he didn't do it again during that time, the charge would be dismissed.

He insisted so much on these 3 points that we ended up accepting it as the only solution, but while waiting in the court room, we kept feeling that it wasn’t right. So my husband spoke to the prosecutor again and told him, that we wanted him to be charged as guilty and nothing less. We were then told that we will be re-scheduled for another court date for a trial.

Please advice us on how to proceed. The noticed that was sent to my husband said he was to be a witness in the case of the State against our neighbor, is that the right way to handle this case? Do we need a lawyer? Does it even matter what we want? We really want our neighbor to be punished for what he did, especially because according to another neighbor this is not the first time he does something like this and I honestly think he was targeting our little girl.

Your advice will be greatly appreciated.

 

[Isis1]

i'm curious, what exactly was he charged with?

expusure to a child? just plain exposure? urinating in public?

do you have the exact charge handy?

 

[justalayman]

It sounds like your rendition of the facts is different than the neighbors and it appears they are believing his side over yours.

Your rights are to file a complaint when you are a victim of a crime. The prosecutor determines what charges, if any, are filed. From the very beginning you are a victim/witness with very little, if any, input on what crime is charged and what actions the prosecutor takes.

 

[swalsh411]

You're making a very big deal out of a guy taking a leak.

 

[justalayman]

You're making a very big deal out of a guy taking a leak.

No, they are making a big deal about a guy exposing his genitals in public in view of other people. While I personally believe the US to be a bit prudish about the whole thing, the fact is, exposing your junk to another person is generally a crime.

 

[CreativeBlock]

You're making a very big deal out of a guy taking a leak.

With all due respect, my husband and son have taken "leaks" outside (please, don't ask ~ I think it's gross), but they've always taken care to find a secluded spot.

And as someone who used to go on camping/hunting trips frequently (read: at least 12 times a year) with male companions, I've NEVER seen a man NOT go off into a secluded spot prior to draining the proverbial lizard.

Bottom line: Taking a whizz outside does not require "airing the goods out" beforehand, much less doing it in view of neighbors or passers-by.

Heck, in most states (including my state ~ Florida, the land of the drunken Spring Breakers ~ and remember, you don't own the beer you drink, you simply rent it), if you pee in an otherwise deserted alley and someone sees you, it's considered lewd and/or indecent exposure.

 

[xylene]

You're making a very big deal out of a guy taking a leak.

Last I checked the law makes a big deal of taking a leak in front of people.

People doing so in front of children for sexual gratification is a REAL big deal.

What planet are you on?

 

[Isis1]

With all due respect, my husband and son have taken "leaks" outside (please, don't ask ~ I think it's gross), but they've always taken care to find a secluded spot.

And as someone who used to go on camping/hunting trips frequently (read: at least 12 times a year) with male companions, I've NEVER seen a man NOT go off into a secluded spot prior to draining the proverbial lizard.

Bottom line: Taking a whizz outside does not require "airing the goods out" beforehand, much less doing it in view of neighbors or passers-by.

Heck, in most states (including my state ~ Florida, the land of the drunken Spring Breakers ~ and remember, you don't own the beer you drink, you simply rent it), if you pee in an otherwise deserted alley and someone sees you, it's considered lewd and/or indecent exposure.

my four year old goes in library potted plants.

 

[CreativeBlock]

my four year old goes in library potted plants.

My BIL was the one that taught my son how to pee outside when he was about that age. My son decided that the gist of that lesson was that if you have to go, any place will do (don't ask ~ if you knew my BIL, you'd understand how he came to that conclusion) as long as no one's watching.

So, one day, while my son was in kindergarten, I got a very irate call from his kindergarten teacher. Apparently, my son and four other boys took turns (each doing so privately) "painting the walls" of the bathroom.

Somewhere, there is a traumatized 13 year old girl walking around, terrified of using public restrooms because of my son and his friends (apparently, this little girl notified the teacher, after stepping in a huge puddle of urine). And his kindergarten teacher likely has nightmares about it, too.

Boys are gross.

 

[Isis1]

My BIL was the one that taught my son how to pee outside when he was about that age. My son decided that the gist of that lesson was that if you have to go, any place will do (don't ask ~ if you knew my BIL, you'd understand how he came to that conclusion) as long as no one's watching.

So, one day, while my son was in kindergarten, I got a very irate call from his kindergarten teacher. Apparently, my son and four other boys took turns (each doing so privately) "painting the walls" of the bathroom.

Somewhere, there is a traumatized 13 year old girl walking around, terrified of using public restrooms because of my son and his friends (apparently, this little girl notified the teacher, after stepping in a huge puddle of urine). And his kindergarten teacher likely has nightmares about it, too.

Boys are gross.

now I'M traumatized!

 

[CreativeBlock]

Last I checked the law makes a big deal of taking a leak in front of people.

People doing so in front of children for sexual gratification is a REAL big deal.

Yup. And $10 says he has priors or has done it prior and just not gotten caught.

 

[swalsh411]

Last I checked the law makes a big deal of taking a leak in front of people.

Peeing is hardly a big deal and not inherantly sexual to most people. You're making it out like the guy was masturbating in front of a preschool.

People doing so in front of children for sexual gratification is a REAL big deal.

What planet are you on?

You don't know that's true. I'd like to think I live on a planet where reasonable people don't jump to sensationalist conclusions which will put people on the sex offender registry.

 

[CreativeBlock]

now I'M traumatized!

Bet his tinkling in potted plants doesn't sound so bad now, does it?!

At least, it's in a container! And hopefully, the only one who suffers is the plant ... and not someone's shoes!!

 

[justalayman]

Peeing is hardly a big deal and not inherantly sexual to most people. You're making it out like the guy was masturbating in front of a preschool.
.

while an added attraction of the guy playing with himself brings additional crimes to the table, the act of exposing yourself to others is generally a crime, even if just urinating. The exposure, as described, was intentional and that is why it is a problem.

 

[CreativeBlock]

Peeing is hardly a big deal and not inherantly sexual to most people. You're making it out like the guy was masturbating in front of a preschool.

Actually, urinating in front of someone or where you know someone can see IS inherently sexual. It's called exhibitionism. AND Urolagnia. Both are sexual paraphilias.

People don't just wee facing their neighbor's bay windows in broad daylight unless they ARE doing it for sexual gratification. Unless they're really drunk or really stupid.