Need Help

[Jeff Lafort jr.]

Illegal love, or not?

Maine:

I live in the state of Maine and at the age of 21 soon to be 22. I have been seeing a 16yr for about 4 months now.

To give you some background I have known her since she was 14. I told her I would not date her until the age of 18. When she turned 16 I did some research and found that in Maine at 16 she is legal to date and that is the age of consent. So at that time we proceeded onto a non sexual relationship.

Before we dated I had a chat with her mom to see what she thought of this idea. She approved of it because she got to know me in the last to years and I have change her daughters life a lot in a positive way. The only grunge she had was the age difference but she ok it.

I have great love for this girl. I do realize we are from to different worlds but we connect well and would hate to lose that in any way.

Recently, we have been talking about sex and told her I don't want to do anything until i got things more clarried with the consent law. My question that I have is; even though the age of consent in Maine is 16 is there any limitations to a person my age or would it be ok long as she says yes it is ok to proceeded.


I hope somone can help....thank you

 

[a1cr.a.w2002]

Your a pig find somone your own age damn craddle robber... thats my advice for you.

 

[Jeff Lafort jr.]

advice

I know to most of the outside world doesn't see this right, but at least I am taking a good route and seeking legal advice before anything goes wrong. Some people wouldn't care.

I love this girl alot and hate to lose her. We have done alot of good for each other and it would be hard to replace her. I was once told if you love someone hold onto them and don't loss them. that doesn't mean sleeping.....

I am not having sex with her therefor I am not a "pig". I am just seeking some basic knowledge of the law just in case if anything were to happen. We been together for 4 months and known for 2 years with no sexual activity that is pretty darn good. I just want a legal opinion on age of consent and my limitations.

 

[john1022]

Re: advice

I know to most of the outside world doesn't see this right, but at least I am taking a good route and seeking legal advice before anything goes wrong. Some people wouldn't care.

I love this girl alot and hate to lose her. We have done alot of good for each other and it would be hard to replace her. I was once told if you love someone hold onto them and don't loss them. that doesn't mean sleeping.....

I am not having sex with her therefor I am not a "pig". I am just seeking some basic knowledge of the law just in case if anything were to happen. We been together for 4 months and known for 2 years with no sexual activity that is pretty darn good. I just want a legal opinion on age of consent and my limitations.

My advice to you is to go back to plan 1 and wait til she is 18. If you both love each other as much as you say then the next 2 years will be worth it. You both are young don't rush into it time will find its way. good luck.

 

[pishtosh]

I would agree that it is better to wait a while. Even if it may be legal, 16 year olds (girls or boys) have no idea what they want and may be completely different people by the time they reach the age of 18 or 20. If you really do love each other, 2 years will be nothing.

 

[Jeff Lafort jr.]

Thanks

I would like to say thanks for both of your comments. I will take into consideration any thoughts you have had about me backing. It will hard to do because of the feeling I have for this girl.

Even though I do have plan on what gonna happen to us I would still like to know if someone does know the consent law in maine in more detail. It would be help thanks

 

[hexeliebe]

Regardles of the opinions that have been expressed here, your only LEGAL answer is that the age of consent is 16 in Maine. Which means that at that age a child can consent to having sex.

It can be with at 17 year-old, 22 year-old or a 50 year-old. Legally it does not matter.

As for the opinion on whether you should or not, I'll leave that to the morality police.

 

[cbg]

My non-legal opinion, which I have expressed in other threads of the same type, is that any time the ages of the parties are such that you have to ASK if it is legal, you're a damned fool if you go ahead with it, whether it turns out to be technically legal or not. What the 16 year old may think she wants and what is actually the best thing for her, can be worlds apart.

 

[djohnson]

Not that I agree with it, but I think the reality of it is most 16 year olds are in this stage. The are either doing it, wanting to do it, or getting ready to try it. Even though it may be better to wait, I think she is very fourtunate that it's with someone that cares and be safe rather than the majority of 16 year olds. She is old enough to consent, but remember people mature at different rates and there is always consequences.

 

[Jeff Lafort jr.]

agree

I agree with all of you.


If our relationship was base on sex or if thats what I just wanted from her, I would have had that type of relationship a long time ago. I do love her with all my heart and we have talked about this in the past. She does understand that I am not ready to have a sexual relationship because of this issue.

I guess I may very pernoid on what may happen to me and don't want to chance it, but kinda want to know if there is more behind the consent thing. It just seems wierd a 16 can have sex but can't but scratch ticket....

 

[dequeendistress]

Just remember that this will not apply to all states. Maine just so happens to be one with the 16 yr old consent.

 

[cbg]

Jeff, regardless of the ages involved, if you are uncomfortable with entering into a sexual relationship, DON'T DO IT. There is nothing that can ruin a relationship faster than having sex prematurely.

That goes not just now, with this girl, but throughout your life with anyone.

 

[Jeff Lafort jr.]

cant do it

I quite understand and can't bring myself to have the sexual relationship. The huge problem to me isn't just the guilt but what happens if 10 years she decides to press some kind of rape charges. I dont feel like having that type of backgroung on me. Plus of course it would be my word verse hers....guess who the winner would me. NOT ME

I know we can go without the sexual relationship but I dont know if I could take a few of yours advice to back off. I mean I understand fully, but i love her quite a bit and hate to loose her.

I am planning to have a talk with her over the weekend and I will keep you updated on what happens. Thanks so much

 

[HomeGuru]

Jeff, do you have a high school and college degree?

 

[Jeff Lafort jr.]

Degree

I did graduated from High School and now in my second year of college for a business degree.