What is the name of your state? Minnesota
I understand that an executor has an obligation not to "sit on things", but is there such a thing as moving too fast? My older siblings are co-executors of our mother's estate and are pushing to have everything closed up way too fast for myself and youngest sibling. They have lived out of state for 40 years now and don't want to deal with anything back here - they just want the money and they want it now. (no financial need here - they live in million dollar homes). We younger two were told right away that we were responsible for clearing out mom's house because we live 60 and 35 miles away and we're much closer. But they want it done immediately. We have begged for a longer timeline as we have jobs and families that we also must care for (they're much older than us, being from a first marriage, and are nearly ready to retire) but to no avail. As the brother stated "I can listen to what you have to say, but ultimately it's what I want that happens."
I have spent all but 2 weekends since 2005 began at mom's because of the amount of work to do in such a short time. I have put 2500 miles on my vehicle, without a dime of reimbursement. My relationship with my partner is destroyed, my child's life has been put on hold, and my job is in jeopardy because of the expectations placed on me. They call once or twice a week to hound us about getting the house emptied. The youngest sister is in the same situation, sans children. All this time they sit back and enojy life, go to movies and plays, out to eat, take cruises and vacations to exotic locations, get paid $100 per hour for whatever they do concerning the estate, the few times they do come to mom's they take whatever they want regardless of whether one of us has expressed a desire in the item (and of course it is only the items that have any monetary value), pass "secret" checks back and forth to each other from the estate account that will have things like "closed meeting" written in the memo spot...they haven't even let us two see the will. Now things are getting uglier and they are calling us incompetent because we can't work faster, and barbs about the fact that mom's marriage to our dad wasn't good and ended in divorce. There are many other nasty things happening - these just touch a few of the highlights.
I guess my questions boil down to - doesn't an executor have a responsibility to treat everyone fairly? Is it really their right to lord over those that aren't executors in this manner? Do my younger sister and I have a right to know what all they have been paid for? I am so hurt, confused, and exhausted.