2 Questions - who is contact for PSI and should i tell a parole officer this

[DUIasahobby]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA

My son's mom just got her 2nd DUI. She got an attorney this time but still pled guilty yesterday and will be sentenced in a month. It is her second tier 2 and I don't imagine they will be easy on her given the state but she is pulling every trick she knows. She asked me to say nice things if someone calls me because she asked for something called a PSI to try to get no jail time or just weekends in jail. She is telling them she has half custody of my son when she actually does not. There is no court order but I have him all the time and she comes and gets him maybe once a week at most. I have kept track of it for a few years now because I heard that was a good idea so there's no question about it. Plus he goes to school from my house while she lives in another town that is a 35 minute drive to his school. She just started asking me for more time because her attorney said it might help her so she looks good or the judge will feel sorry for her when being sentenced and said that was exactly why she is asking for more time. Will the person doing the PSI really call me? I don't know why my ex would want that or why she would expect me to lie for her and to be honest I want to contact them myself since she straight out told me she is going to lie and is just using our son to try to look like an involved mother.

The other question is she is seeing her ex again, who is a guy who has had so many DUIs that he doesn't have a license for the rest of his life, plus he has severely beat her and attacked a cop during arrest. I have police reports for all of this stuff and it goes into quite some detail about the last time he attacked her and also got reckless endangerment for trapping her in the car and swiping a semi while driving drunk. He got out of jail in February and they went back to seeing each other right away. Problem is he is on probation for 5 years after this last incident (he was in jail for two years), and I don't think his parole officer knows or would be happy that he's back with the woman he beat up, that she also has DUIs, and that they are both drinking (I had to go pick up my son the other day when she had him because she said she had a few drinks with the boyfriend over and wanted to be safe. At least she's not being that stupid for once.) I know I could go to court and go through the mess of getting it ordered that he can't be around my boy because I have talked to an attorney already. But it seems like it would be a lot faster and free if I just call his probation and tell them what is going on and let them handle him. I want to know if I can do that or if it is a waste of time.

 

[Ohiogal]

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? PA

My son's mom just got her 2nd DUI. She got an attorney this time but still pled guilty yesterday and will be sentenced in a month. It is her second tier 2 and I don't imagine they will be easy on her given the state but she is pulling every trick she knows. She asked me to say nice things if someone calls me because she asked for something called a PSI to try to get no jail time or just weekends in jail. She is telling them she has half custody of my son when she actually does not. There is no court order but I have him all the time and she comes and gets him maybe once a week at most. I have kept track of it for a few years now because I heard that was a good idea so there's no question about it. Plus he goes to school from my house while she lives in another town that is a 35 minute drive to his school. She just started asking me for more time because her attorney said it might help her so she looks good or the judge will feel sorry for her when being sentenced and said that was exactly why she is asking for more time. Will the person doing the PSI really call me? I don't know why my ex would want that or why she would expect me to lie for her and to be honest I want to contact them myself since she straight out told me she is going to lie and is just using our son to try to look like an involved mother.

The other question is she is seeing her ex again, who is a guy who has had so many DUIs that he doesn't have a license for the rest of his life, plus he has severely beat her and attacked a cop during arrest. I have police reports for all of this stuff and it goes into quite some detail about the last time he attacked her and also got reckless endangerment for trapping her in the car and swiping a semi while driving drunk. He got out of jail in February and they went back to seeing each other right away. Problem is he is on probation for 5 years after this last incident (he was in jail for two years), and I don't think his parole officer knows or would be happy that he's back with the woman he beat up, that she also has DUIs, and that they are both drinking (I had to go pick up my son the other day when she had him because she said she had a few drinks with the boyfriend over and wanted to be safe. At least she's not being that stupid for once.) I know I could go to court and go through the mess of getting it ordered that he can't be around my boy because I have talked to an attorney already. But it seems like it would be a lot faster and free if I just call his probation and tell them what is going on and let them handle him. I want to know if I can do that or if it is a waste of time.

Technically she is the only one with custody without a court order and if you were not married when the child was born. The person doing the PSI could call you. Tell the truth regarding the answers to the questions IF you decide to answer at all.

Then go to court and get court orders for CUSTODY of your child with visitation and such spelled out. As well as other limitations. Why you haven't gotten a court order for custody at this point is baffling.

 

[Zigner]

It may not be convenient for you, but you really need to get things in order with the child. At this point, you have no legal custody of the child at all.

 

[Zigner]

Technically she is the only one with custody without a court order and if you were not married when the child was born. The person doing the PSI could call you. Tell the truth regarding the answers to the questions IF you decide to answer at all.

Then go to court and get court orders for CUSTODY of your child with visitation and such spelled out. As well as other limitations. Why you haven't gotten a court order for custody at this point is baffling.

Yeah, that!

 

[DUIasahobby]

Saying I don't have Legal Custody.

Sorry but that is not true for our area. I have already consulted with an attorney right after she got the second dui a few months ago. In our area whichever parent has the child in their care has legal custody. In this area it does not default to the mother like in some states. That is one of the things I first checked into because I read about it online and was not sure if it was true for me. My attorney was very clear. So if I decided to hold him in the house and pick him up from school so she couldn't get to him or I up and moved with him one state over that would not be illegal and if she did the same thing right now without a custody agreement in place then it would be just as legal for her. I mean it would look bad on either of us in court. But it would not be illegal since we both have legal custody according to this area and my attorney.

Also I am working on custody but that is a snails pace. She will fight every aspect because she is just not that smart and will fight even when there is nothing to fight about or the fighting will not work in her favor. If I say I want custody paperwork to protect both of us from pulling nasty tricks with each other she just goes into this whole tirade "iwillgetmysonandnojudgewilltellmeican'tandifyoutakemetocourtyouwillneverseehimagainbecauseiamhismotherandmothersaremoreimportant" and all this nonsense. My boy is around this person the boyfriend right now. I am wondering if there is something I can do to stop it right exactly now by calling the probation officer instead of waiting for 4 months or more for it to get to custody or a mediator.

 

[Zigner]

Are you the legal father of the child?'

ETA: You misunderstood what your attorney told you.

 

[DUIasahobby]

Are you the legal father of the child?'

ETA: You misunderstood what your attorney told you.

Yes I am the legal father. And I brought in a straight-up printout of the legal custody guidelines because I was told to check into that carefully. She was clear as a bell. I have legal standing to petition for custody and my petition is being created as a draft to submit to the court.

 

[Zigner]

Yes I am the legal father. And I brought in a straight-up printout of the legal custody guidelines because I was told to check into that carefully. She was clear as a bell. I have legal standing to petition for custody and my petition is being created as a draft to submit to the court.

I thought you had legal custody...it can't be both.

It appears that it's a moot point though. You are taking the proper steps to establish legal custody. I wish you the best of luck.

 

[Ohiogal]

Yes I am the legal father. And I brought in a straight-up printout of the legal custody guidelines because I was told to check into that carefully. She was clear as a bell. I have legal standing to petition for custody and my petition is being created as a draft to submit to the court.

having standing does NOT give you legal custody. Two very different things. I don't disagree that you have standing. But I do disagree that you already have legal custody.

 

[DUIasahobby]

I don't even know why it came up. I see a lot of arguing about semantics as I am cruising around here rather than directly addressing the question asked. It looks like it happens to other people here The superiority complex and redirecting and baiting other issues works in the courtroom but not for common people who are asking direct questions on a website. My question was simple and direct - would it be potentially effective to help in stopping this guy from being around my boy if I called his probation officer. Instead it got dragged into a rabbit hole about filing for custody. If you don't know the answer to the root question then just say so.

 

[Silverplum]

I don't even know why it came up. I see a lot of arguing about semantics as I am cruising around here rather than directly addressing the question asked. It looks like it happens to other people here The superiority complex and redirecting and baiting other issues works in the courtroom but not for common people who are asking direct questions on a website. My question was simple and direct - would it be potentially effective to help in stopping this guy from being around my boy if I called his probation officer. Instead it got dragged into a rabbit hole about filing for custody. If you don't know the answer to the root question then just say so.

You don't know enough about the law to criticize the nice volunteers.

Here's a clue for you: I have as much right to that boy as you do. The mailman has as much right to the kid as you do, or as I do.

You have not been legally declared the father = you have NO rights. None.

You have standing to file = go ahead and file, but until you have been declared the father, you have NO rights.

Now. Do you get it? Or do you have some more criticisms to spout?

 

[Ladyback1]

I don't even know why it came up. I see a lot of arguing about semantics as I am cruising around here rather than directly addressing the question asked. It looks like it happens to other people here The superiority complex and redirecting and baiting other issues works in the courtroom but not for common people who are asking direct questions on a website. My question was simple and direct - would it be potentially effective to help in stopping this guy from being around my boy if I called his probation officer. Instead it got dragged into a rabbit hole about filing for custody. If you don't know the answer to the root question then just say so.

Unless Probation/Parole effectively revokes his "freedom" (and there is no guarantee that they will or can) then where are you going to be?
What happens when mom fishes in the dating cesspool and starts dating another winner? How are you going to fix that?

The safest, most reliable and effective way to handle this is to continue with seeking custody. That appears to be the best long term solution.

 

[Silverplum]

Sorry but that is not true for our area. I have already consulted with an attorney right after she got the second dui a few months ago. In our area whichever parent has the child in their care has legal custody. In this area it does not default to the mother like in some states. That is one of the things I first checked into because I read about it online and was not sure if it was true for me. My attorney was very clear. So if I decided to hold him in the house and pick him up from school so she couldn't get to him or I up and moved with him one state over that would not be illegal and if she did the same thing right now without a custody agreement in place then it would be just as legal for her. I mean it would look bad on either of us in court. But it would not be illegal since we both have legal custody according to this area and my attorney.

Also I am working on custody but that is a snails pace. She will fight every aspect because she is just not that smart and will fight even when there is nothing to fight about or the fighting will not work in her favor. If I say I want custody paperwork to protect both of us from pulling nasty tricks with each other she just goes into this whole tirade "iwillgetmysonandnojudgewilltellmeican'tandifyoutakemetocourtyouwillneverseehimagainbecauseiamhismotherandmothersaremoreimportant" and all this nonsense. My boy is around this person the boyfriend right now. I am wondering if there is something I can do to stop it right exactly now by calling the probation officer instead of waiting for 4 months or more for it to get to custody or a mediator.

It's true everywhere.

 

[Ohiogal]

I don't even know why it came up. I see a lot of arguing about semantics as I am cruising around here rather than directly addressing the question asked. It looks like it happens to other people here The superiority complex and redirecting and baiting other issues works in the courtroom but not for common people who are asking direct questions on a website. My question was simple and direct - would it be potentially effective to help in stopping this guy from being around my boy if I called his probation officer. Instead it got dragged into a rabbit hole about filing for custody. If you don't know the answer to the root question then just say so.

Not arguing about semantics. Trying to educate the ignorant. If you want to prevent someone dangerous from being around your son, GET IT IN A COURT ORDER. Which brings us back to what? Oh yeah, custody! Go figure that. You can't protect your child until you have court orders. Calling a probation officer may not do anything at all. We know the answer. You were told the answer. But you don't comprehend the answer.

 

[DUIasahobby]

Unless Probation/Parole effectively revokes his "freedom" (and there is no guarantee that they will or can) then where are you going to be?
What happens when mom fishes in the dating cesspool and starts dating another winner? How are you going to fix that?

The safest, most reliable and effective way to handle this is to continue with seeking custody. That appears to be the best long term solution.

Thank you, that is a helpful answer. If there is even a chance that the parole officer can revoke his freedom in a shorter time than the wait for court then I will take it. And in the meantime continue the custody route, which includes a provision that he cannot be around the child at all. She believes it will be a shoo-in even though the ex will fight it to the death. Shoo-in because he also had taken an alford plea in another state due to charges of 2nd degree rape and contributing to the delinquency of a minor in addition to 10 years of DUIs, aggravated assault and some other stuff thrown in. And my ex admitted she knew about the rape and sex assault charges but "he didn't rape anybody" even though the charge means he was over 19 and the girl was 14 or under. But it will take months before anything is finalized and the interim order will only talk about keeping his schedule as it has been and school and such.