M
MannietheDragon
Guest
What is the name of your state? New York
Last month, my girlfriend of 3 years and myself got into a nasty fight. Without going into too much detail just yet, I'll say that emotions ran high, harsh words were said, and it got pyshical. It resulted in a charge of Harrassment 2nd Violation and an Order of Protection placed against me.
Now, before my day in court, I was just gonna plea guilty to the charges and get on with my life. When I read her statement though, I couldn't. My jaw dropped. Her statement wasn't true. While some of what she said was true, most of what she said wasn't.
Her statement read:
"He pushed his was into my apartment. He then slammed me to the floor, bounced my head off the floor. Kicked and punched me, and put me in fear of my life."
Now, like I said: Some of that was true. But that isn't at all how I remember it. So now I'll give my side. And I'll say this: It is nothing that I am proud of.
The day started of simple enough. I came over at her request. She hugged me and told me how much she missed me and so on. We left her place to go shopping. On the way back, something happened that really upset me. We argued about it the whole way home. And by the time we got back to her place, she decided that she didn't want to speak to me ever again. Acting on both confusion and desperation, I did push my way into her apartment. That was the first mistake I made. She immediately started to yell. And she insisted that I leave. I refused, and she got violent. She started throwing punches and pushing me. At that point, the only thing I did was try to hold her arms, catch her punches, and calm her down. The only thing that did was make her more pissed off. She continued to hit me and toss me around. After so long of this, all hell broke loose. I got mad because she wouldn't stop hitting me, so I got forceful with defending myself, and I started to push back. I grabbed her wrists tighter, and held her down. At that point, she started to get scared. She made a couple of attempts to call her mother. But I didn't let her. Why? I don't know. But probably for a couple of reasons: Her stepdad would show up and beat the tar out of me, and because at that point, I didn't want to get in trouble. So, we continued to wrestle around, push each other, and scream back and forth. Eventually, We cooled off. Enough for the two of us to go for a ride to the store. When we got back, she invited me inside. That was another mistake. We talked for a little while, and everything seemed okay. But then, we started arguing again. Shortly thereafter, another fight broke out. It was the same as before: Pushing, shoving, wrestling around. She hit me a few more times, even a couple of time with her keys. And she must have bit me at least ten times. Then, she left the apartment, and I followed. We had a verbal exchanged in the street that involved alot of screaming. Then, a mutual friend showed up and got in the middle. She took off, and after talking for a minute I left too.
Never once during the whole thing did I kick her, punch her, or slam her to the floor and bounce her head off of it. All I did was push her and hold her down.
Later on that night, I turned myself in to the police. They served me the order of protection, and I gave them my statement. They never asked about any of my injuries, which were quite visible: I had cuts on my arms and neck, bite marks, a black eye, and bruises all over my arms and chest. I suppose I should have made it a point to show them. But at that point, I was tired, and not really thinking too clearly. But when I got home that night, I had dated pictures taken of all my injuries, just in case. I also had 2 text messages on my phone from her, which I also saved just in case.
A few days later, I called up our mutual friend who stopped the fight. He told me he saw her a couple hours after she had left. He said she was in a good mood. He also told me that she had no visible bruises or marks anywhere. Which didn't suprise me, because I knew the only thing I did was push her around. The only injury she seemed to have on her forearm: She burned herself the day beforewith a curling iron. And I dressed it for her when I got over that day.
Anyways, That's how it happened through my eyes. And hopefully you can see my dilema. She lied about what really happened, and told the police that I beat her up. When really, she beat me up.
Since then, I developed the pictures taken of me that show my injuries. I also kept the shirt that I was wearing that was torn to shreds. And our friend said that he would tell whomever he needed to what he saw that night.
But I also have another problem. I contacted her via e-mail. And last saturday, she asked me to call her. So I did. I know I shouldn't have, but I did anyway. We talked for about 30 mins. or so. I apologized for all that happened. So did she. She also told me how much she missed me. We both agreed that we shouldn't be around one another though. She told me she wanted to talk again sometime. And she also told me that she had no intentions of calling the police. I believed her. And as of today, she hasn't. And I don't think she will. Besides, since I read her statement, I have no intentions of speaking with hear anytime soon (never again.)
Anyways, I know I screwed up. But what do I do now? How should I handle this? Any input would be greatly appreciated.
-MannietheDragon
Last month, my girlfriend of 3 years and myself got into a nasty fight. Without going into too much detail just yet, I'll say that emotions ran high, harsh words were said, and it got pyshical. It resulted in a charge of Harrassment 2nd Violation and an Order of Protection placed against me.
Now, before my day in court, I was just gonna plea guilty to the charges and get on with my life. When I read her statement though, I couldn't. My jaw dropped. Her statement wasn't true. While some of what she said was true, most of what she said wasn't.
Her statement read:
"He pushed his was into my apartment. He then slammed me to the floor, bounced my head off the floor. Kicked and punched me, and put me in fear of my life."
Now, like I said: Some of that was true. But that isn't at all how I remember it. So now I'll give my side. And I'll say this: It is nothing that I am proud of.
The day started of simple enough. I came over at her request. She hugged me and told me how much she missed me and so on. We left her place to go shopping. On the way back, something happened that really upset me. We argued about it the whole way home. And by the time we got back to her place, she decided that she didn't want to speak to me ever again. Acting on both confusion and desperation, I did push my way into her apartment. That was the first mistake I made. She immediately started to yell. And she insisted that I leave. I refused, and she got violent. She started throwing punches and pushing me. At that point, the only thing I did was try to hold her arms, catch her punches, and calm her down. The only thing that did was make her more pissed off. She continued to hit me and toss me around. After so long of this, all hell broke loose. I got mad because she wouldn't stop hitting me, so I got forceful with defending myself, and I started to push back. I grabbed her wrists tighter, and held her down. At that point, she started to get scared. She made a couple of attempts to call her mother. But I didn't let her. Why? I don't know. But probably for a couple of reasons: Her stepdad would show up and beat the tar out of me, and because at that point, I didn't want to get in trouble. So, we continued to wrestle around, push each other, and scream back and forth. Eventually, We cooled off. Enough for the two of us to go for a ride to the store. When we got back, she invited me inside. That was another mistake. We talked for a little while, and everything seemed okay. But then, we started arguing again. Shortly thereafter, another fight broke out. It was the same as before: Pushing, shoving, wrestling around. She hit me a few more times, even a couple of time with her keys. And she must have bit me at least ten times. Then, she left the apartment, and I followed. We had a verbal exchanged in the street that involved alot of screaming. Then, a mutual friend showed up and got in the middle. She took off, and after talking for a minute I left too.
Never once during the whole thing did I kick her, punch her, or slam her to the floor and bounce her head off of it. All I did was push her and hold her down.
Later on that night, I turned myself in to the police. They served me the order of protection, and I gave them my statement. They never asked about any of my injuries, which were quite visible: I had cuts on my arms and neck, bite marks, a black eye, and bruises all over my arms and chest. I suppose I should have made it a point to show them. But at that point, I was tired, and not really thinking too clearly. But when I got home that night, I had dated pictures taken of all my injuries, just in case. I also had 2 text messages on my phone from her, which I also saved just in case.
A few days later, I called up our mutual friend who stopped the fight. He told me he saw her a couple hours after she had left. He said she was in a good mood. He also told me that she had no visible bruises or marks anywhere. Which didn't suprise me, because I knew the only thing I did was push her around. The only injury she seemed to have on her forearm: She burned herself the day beforewith a curling iron. And I dressed it for her when I got over that day.
Anyways, That's how it happened through my eyes. And hopefully you can see my dilema. She lied about what really happened, and told the police that I beat her up. When really, she beat me up.
Since then, I developed the pictures taken of me that show my injuries. I also kept the shirt that I was wearing that was torn to shreds. And our friend said that he would tell whomever he needed to what he saw that night.
But I also have another problem. I contacted her via e-mail. And last saturday, she asked me to call her. So I did. I know I shouldn't have, but I did anyway. We talked for about 30 mins. or so. I apologized for all that happened. So did she. She also told me how much she missed me. We both agreed that we shouldn't be around one another though. She told me she wanted to talk again sometime. And she also told me that she had no intentions of calling the police. I believed her. And as of today, she hasn't. And I don't think she will. Besides, since I read her statement, I have no intentions of speaking with hear anytime soon (never again.)
Anyways, I know I screwed up. But what do I do now? How should I handle this? Any input would be greatly appreciated.
-MannietheDragon