Legal separation and alcoholism

What is the name of your state? Georgia
My sister has been in a bad marriage for 8 years. She became depressed all the time and then began drinking to the point of her being in and out of rehab and would be considered habitually intoxicated which are grounds for divorce. Her husband has had enough and is taking her to sign for legal separation. I agree they need to be split up but we want to make sure he doesn't take advantage of this situation and that she gets what is fair. Can she get at least Joint legal custody? We know that because of her problem that she will not get physical custody? Or is she forced to relinquish the kids forever? Also, He wants to put the house in his name? Will that keep her from getting her share of the equity? Can he be forced to pay her spousal support and get her into treatment? He makes a good deal of money and she doesn't work. I fear she is not in the state of mind to be able to protect herself. If she looses her kids from this, that is one thing but I hate for her to loose it all. I just want what is fair to her.

She needs to get a lawyer. Chances are, yes, she is not going to be the primary parent for the children, but she can probably get joint legal (just not physical) custody and standard visitation. She's probably entitled to have the equity in the house & other marital property..but then again, what about the debt from the marriage? I'm sure rehab wasn't cheap, they could be swimming it & the only way out would be to refinance to pay that off. But we don't know, you'll have to ask your sister. She can ask for rehabilitive alimony, but it sounds like he has already tried, she failed. Since she isn't going to have the children, she is going to be required to pay child support. Perhaps she can ask that c/s be waived for a year or longer so she can clean up & get back on her feet.
Again, we don't know all the circumstances. Take her to see a good family law attorney & then a good long term residential treatment facility.
Good Luck to your sister, I hope she can get past this!
KAT

legaladvice4me said:

What is the name of your state? Georgia
If she looses her kids from this, that is one thing but I hate for her to loose it all. I just want what is fair to her.

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If she loses the kids, no big deal, but the money!!! Don't let her lose the money!!!

She refuses to accept responsibility for herself and cannot take proper care of the children she helped create, and you want him to finance her lack of personal responsibility. I realize this is your sister, and I may feel the same about my sister, but if people keep enabling her to do this she will never change. She will continue to avoid personal responsibility because people will be there, via a court order or otherwise, to make sure she can keep avoiding responsibility. I know it sounds horrible, but the best thing that can happen to her if she doesn't take responsibility for her own actions is for her to hit bottom, and she will have to be the one to crawl back up if that is what she really wants.

Thank you Kat1963 for the excellent advice. Your advice confirmed what I was thinking. We are searching for an affordable residential treatment facility for her. Key word here is "affordable".

As far as what veronicaGia wrote... I agree with what you had to say. I am not an advocate for turning over 1/2 of their savings and 1/2 of the house to her. The reason the $ is important is 1.) she will need to have something to start over with 2.) it is needed to help pay for any kind of residential treatment that she will need. 3.) She has been an equally contributing member to that income until this past fall.

I think loosing her kids is definately her bottom. I would not be surpised if she committed suicide. She loves her kids very much and before this past year, she was the primary caregiver. Not her workaholic, golf playing, non-affectionate, unloving husband. But we won't go into all the reasons why she was so unhappy and depressed that she started drinking. That would be a book in and of itself.

I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy.