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mepanp

Guest
What is the name of your state? TX

My husband and I have been married for 4 years...we have a 2 yr old daughter...he has serious pain from bad teeth he hasn't ben able to have pulled yet..he uses alcohol as a relief aid but sometimes he gets real drunk and tends to get abusive to me and sometimes I fear for my daughter...not that he would kill her but that he will be too rough w/her or hurt her. In these states of his, he says he will pick up and take off w/her and leave me if things don't go his way. That is my biggest fear of him taking off w/her and me neve seeing her again...what would be the next course to take and do I risk losing my child? Thanks for any help.
 


gobonas99

Member
Have your husband go to a dentist and have the teeth pulled. Then he will no longer have an excuse to get drunk.

Although my guess is that your husband is an alcoholic, and even when he does get the teeth pulled, he will still get drunk and be abusive to you and your daughter.
 
M

mepanp

Guest
Well

he's only had the problem for about 1 month now...my hope is when we get him to get the teeth pulled it will stop and he says that as well....it is just a matter of getting him to go...he says it is too much money but I think he is afraid of the dentist. thanks for responding.
 
D

dianneph

Guest
I'm not a lawyer, I'm a single parent. This is my personal take on what you could do to help yourself. This is not legal advice, just common sense advice.

Alcohol is not a pain reliever, it is a method of escaping - whether it's from physical pain or mental pain, either way it is not helping your husband or you and it is creating more problems.

I'd suggest:
1. Search for a dentist who is willing to do emergency extractions and accept a payment plan from you.
3. Search for a dentist that does community service outreach work (free dentistry for those with no insurance or means for paying)
2. Call dentistry schools in your area to inquire if they allow student dentist to perform extractions and ask how that works for someone who needs dental care but has no money.
3. Ask your husband, when he is sober, how he justifies the cost of whatever he has been drinking over the past month over the cost of just getting the dental work done and eliminating the problems caused by his drinking.
4. Contact Al-Anon and ask for help for yourself in dealing with this problem.
5. Tell your husband (again when he is sober) that you love him, but that you can no longer tolerate his drinking for any reason because he is putting you and your child at risk. (Does he drive while drinking as well? - if so, he's also endangering everyone else on the road and himself of course). Tell him the YOU will leave with your daughter unless he corrects this problem immediately. Aspirin is a much safer pain medication.
6. Take your REALISTIC cues from how he reacts to your sincere request that he immediately correct this problem. If he balks, makes excuses, - news flash - NO ONE LIKES GOING TO THE DENTIST!, but normally people don't get drunk and threaten their family to avoid it.
7. Don't just take this behavior and do nothing...you are enabling it if you just put up with it. If you want him to ever respect you (right not he obviously respects no one) you need to be strong and firm and protective of your daughter. If you expose her to more potential harm, you could be held accountable.
8. If he doesn't take you seriously, and he gets drunk again and abusive. Call 911. Let the authorities have a shot at taking care of waking him up. If he abuses you physically, have him evicted and request a temporary restraining order until he can get his act together.
9. Above all, be smart, protect your daughter and yourself. Don't be intimidated into taking abuse, or conned into believing that "soon" he will take care of this. If he is a MAN, and wants to do the right thing, he should put you and your daughter first and do whatever it takes to fix his problem.
 

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