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From Separation to Divorce

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Nethalia

Guest
What is the name of your state? NC

In December, my husband and I agreed to a -brief- separation wherein I would take our son and move in with my parents (which would take me out of our state of residence) and he would move back in with his family until such time as we could save money and become more financially secure. We had hoped this would ease all the arguing/stressing over money as well as give us some breathing room and hopefully get back on track.

We were communicating mainly through e-mails. About two weeks after I arrived at my parent's home, my husband stopped calling and his e-mails became hostile/unfriendly. Confused, I traveled to see him in order to discuss the sudden anger and refusal to be cooperative. He asked me to leave and not return. I gladly did so, still uncertain where the hostilty came from.

It is now mid-March. I have not heard from my husband in any form in almost three weeks. The last e-mail I had only discussed his options for coming down to get our son and taking him back with him, leaving me behind. I have discussed the situation with an attorney and I have been told that if I wish to file for divorce right now, I will have to return to our state of residence and give just cause for why I feel it is necessary to live out of state with our son.

My question is this: Why must I return to our former state of residence? Can I not file here in North Carolina and give just cause for why we are here? I am worried that if I wait and my husband files first, that will end up putting our son through a nasty custody battle that will only hurt him in the long run. But returning to my former state without any place to stay for the duration will be entirely too expensive for me. Any ideas?
 


I AM ALWAYS LIABLE

Senior Member
My response:

You haven't yet satisfied the jurisdiction/residency requirements in your new State. That's why you can't file there yet. If you want to file for divorce and custody, etc., then you'll have to go back to your former State.

That's why.

IAAL
 
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Nethalia

Guest
Thank you for your prompt reply.

I guess I was wondering why I can't file in NC while citing the very same reasons that would allow me to return to NC once I file in my former state. Think of the time, the stress of traveling and the money, it would save.
 

I AM ALWAYS LIABLE

Senior Member
Nethalia said:
Thank you for your prompt reply.

I guess I was wondering why I can't file in NC while citing the very same reasons that would allow me to return to NC once I file in my former state. Think of the time, the stress of traveling and the money, it would save.

My response:

The court doesn't care about your "stress of traveling and the money, it would save." The court, and State law, only care about jurisdiction. That's it. End of story.

IAAL
 
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Nethalia

Guest
Thank you again for another prompt reply. You have answered my question swiftly and, some might say, brutally. I was just reading through several of the other posts on this thread to which you have replied and I wonder if my ignorance has somehow offended you. Your replies to other threads are much less blunt.
 

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