Life after DV

What is the name of your state? WA

I was convicted of DV almost 6 years ago, it was reduced to harassment. I punched a wall while leaving the home of my now ex-girlfriend, we had been fighting over a $3.00 video and the fact that she made more money than me and I should have asked permission for the $3.00.
I am now currently involved with someone else and have been for 5 years, her ex-husband is aware of my DV due to my ex-girlfriend providing him with that info. She does not have custody of her daughter's (long story) we want to get married, but her ex-husband says that if I am around the girls he will put them in a different school and daycare, and have her rights to decision making taken away, because of the RCW. The GAL says she wants both parents to have mutual decision making and that conformity and continuity would be the best for these two girls, because they love their mother.
I am currently not allowed to have contact with her daughters, becasue of the DV, but the first two years we were together I could and the courts knew, and now they say no. I had a DUI, so her ex says I am a danger, the GAL said 6 months clear and clean and I have done that. The last ruling was until further order of the court, can they still keep us apart and order me to do more, it has been over 5 years and only one time...please help

it comes down to this:

if you stay with your girlfriend/fiance, the ex is going to make her life a living hell until the kids are adults.

Your two mistakes (DV and DUI) are going to be a curse on your relationship with this woman.

So, do you want this woman's relationship with her kids to be harmed

OR

do you want to do the right thing and find a woman with no kids or with kids that she has custody of AND stay off the booze.

The choice is yours.