confused & scared!

I know I'm not the only one this has happened to.....

Ok when my daughter was just a few months old, I left her father. I went on welfare as I had no way to support myself. Well they made me file child support.

Ok we were apart for 5 years and he never paid the child support.

Well we ran into each other and started seeing each other again. We realized that we still loved each other and we got back together.

So what I need to know is:
1. How do I get the child support against him stopped,
2. I know we will have to pay back the afdc I collected, but what about the back child support? Will it just go away when the order is stopped?
3. Am I gonna get into any legal trouble for not reporting that I know where he is?

Please! Any help would be greatly appreciated!
Thank you!
MOMinTexas

Yes the afdc checks were stopped when they filed the child support papers. That was 5 years ago.



[This message has been edited by MOMinTEXAS (edited April 23, 2000).]

I had a similar experience, but I was already married to the dad. I was the one ordered to pay everything back... not him. So if you two are really together, I guess in the long run he will pay. Get protection!

You are right... you are not the only one!
What I did was contacted (by letter) child support enforcement to have the case closed. I told them that we had since gotten back to gether and I no longer needed their help. The DES matter with AFDC was never an issue for us, I had stopped getting checks prior to us getting back together. Were you still receiving checks up until the time you got back together with your ex? The money that was paid out to you was given to you in your time of "need". You getting back together with your childs father shouldn't be grounds to have you pay the money back as long as you weren't receiving it fraudulently. It could be a number of reasons why you don't need government assistance anymore, maybe you got a really good paying job.... If you are still receiving checks have them stopped immediately then contact child support enforcement. Good Luck!!!

[This message has been edited by cjskids (edited April 22, 2000).]

Thank you to those who responded! I know it is not legal advice but you did help me anyways! I appreciate it! Some people might have thought 'geez how dense is she?' But I really didn't know how to get started and needed to know that someone else had been through this and could "guide" me! I feel better anyways. Thanks! I am glad I found this place!

To get a legal answer could you clarify the sequence of events.

Your child was born, you left the dad a few months later, you went on afdc (date started receiving?).

For how many months did you receive afdc payments? When did the father first start paying c/s and back support? Date you and father move in together? Is father's current support going to you, and back support to repay afdc?

not realy sure why you would want to get back together with a man that did not pay support. if there more to that story? if not, why? he didn't support your child/children to me that is not a man i would want. in many states if you or your children used a government agency such a welfare they (state) could go back onto the husband/boyfriend/ex to pay back what was spent on you. whatever you do make sure it's in the best interest of your children. in my experiance men seldom change, whatever made you leave him before, might happen again.