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death of a father

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D

dollar

Guest
What is the name of your state? AZ

My father passed away a couple of months ago - since then my mother has refused contact with anyone except my younger sister. (my younger sister hated my father)

A year prior to his death, I needed to borrow money as my son was in some trouble. He and my mother loaned it to me. When my son got his act together, he took over the responsibility for the loan. (part of the repayment also included purchasing a vehicle from my father) Payments were to be made $75.00 a month until the debt was paid off. The agreement was put in writing. $1K to my mother and the balance to my father.

The verbal agreement between the 4 of us, was that my son would be making the $75 payment when he received restitution from the guy that was paying him from a car accident.

While my father was alive this was all fine and good. My son paid off my mother her $1K a week after my fathers funeral. He has not recvd any money from the guy paying restitution since so has not been able to make any further payments.

At my fathers funeral, my mother told us she no longer needed any of us, except my younger sister. We have had no contact except when my son made the payment.

5 days ago, my son called my mother to try to understand what all is going on and she told him she was very emotional and would call another time. Today we get a letter from an atty reminding him of his oblilgation to pay the estate of my father. We don't even know who the estate is? We can assume, but we all know what assume means? What are our rights in regards to the estate of my father? we have no problem making the payments as previously agreed, but here is the final clincher - At the funeral my mother told my older sister, that my father was going to forgive the debt my son owed when he graduated. she was going to go and tell him then, but my older sister suggested waiting as money discussion at the funeral didn't seem appropriate. HELP Thanks
 


Dandy Don

Senior Member
Did your father leave a last will and testament? Normally that is filed at the county courthouse probate court within 30 days after the death. If it is filed you can request a copy of it. See if there is any language in the will about forgiving the debt (there probably isn't). Also, see if there are enough assets in the estate as to whether or not son was named in the will to be receiving anything as a beneficiary.

You have a phrase in your message that states that you don't even know who the "estate -----?---- is": did you mean estate attorney or executor? You can also find that out by checking at the courthouse--that information should also be in the probate file.

You may want to ask the older sister if she is willing to sign an affidavit stating that mother made the remark about the father's desire to forgive the debt when the son graduated (exactly WHEN is that?). Why hasn't the guy making restitution been able to keep up with his payments--was he or was he not expecting payment from an insurance company in regards to this matter?

Looks like mother is being a bit greedy in wanting this money especially if she knew her husband's, so if they ignore the affidavit or say that it doesn't mean anything to them, then son may have to do the responsible thing and go ahead and continue paying the amount due, and son should consider filing a small claims action against the individual involved in the accident to force this person to pay up like he is supposed to do. How much money are we talking about here?

Hopefully son will be receiving something from the estate so that he can afford to have whatever he owes to be deducted from what he will be getting.
 
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D

dollar

Guest
death of father

Dandy Don, thanks so much for the advice. I will check probate court. yes, i meant executor, oops on spelling.

My older sister will be more then willing to do an affidavit. She is livid about the whole thing. It is hard enough to have lost dad, but now this!

Restitution is being paid thru the court, but the probation deparment doesn't count him late until he is 60-90 days past due. I have written letters up letters, citing the judges order of 1st of the month, to no avail. We eventually get it and then my son makes the payments. No insurance company involved since it was an intentional act - road rage! Yes we have had fun! He still owes around $1300.

Thanks for the advice about checking the will to see if my son has any financial claim. But a question, if this attorney was hired not only to go after my son for the money but to handle the estate matters as well, would they not have an obligation to advise us if there was something in the will leaving him money?

We really have no problem paying what he borrowed - I guess it is the fact this is happening that is hard - but want to understand our legal standings.

Thanks again

P.S. My dad would thank you too, his name is Don also.
 

Dandy Don

Senior Member
Yes if your son was due to receive something they should and will be informing him about it by mail or by phone, but there may or may not be a large amount of assets and it takes time (probably 2-4 weeks) to figure everything out (outstanding debts, taxes, etc.) before they can say definitely what he will be getting, if anything.
 
D

dollar

Guest
Dandy Don,
Thanks again for the advice. I don't know exact $ figure, but know there is enough money via several different means for my mom to be able to live very comfortably for another 50 years and she's 75. My dad was sure she would outlive him and always said he had provided enough for that to happen.

Guess that's why this whole thing is weird. We do know the estate is entitled to the money, but want to be sure who is getting i. will be following your suggestions.

And I again, want to thank you for the help.
 

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