B
blufethr
Guest
About 3 days ago, I heard through a long chain of family gossip that my father died in Oregon. I live in another state on the other side of the country. The word is that this happened about 6 months ago. My father and siblings have been estranged from me for years. The breach was of an emotional nature, and not at all likely to have any connection to any estate issues. He would not have disinherited me. Since that time, all but one of them have broken off contact with me, and with my child as well. I have used the same name, had the same phone number and employment for the last few years, and the information was easily available to them all, but no one contacted me. In fact, one of the grandchildren visited me here within the last 5 years.
Personally, I have no great interest in any estate (assuming he left one). However, as a parent, I do not feel free to simply ignore a possible estate which could benefit my child. My personal disputes should not become her property loss. My child will almost certainly at least want some small personal momento of her grandfather. I will help my child obtain this much, if I can. I know that a will was made out by my parents when I was a small child myself, and that it was always kept in a metal lockbox, which would have been in my father's physical possession. My mother told me that it was made out to ensure that everything was divided amongst the sibs equally if they were both gone, but she passed away herself, years ago. My father had 100% medical coverage to handle any medical costs, and three substantial pensions - one of which began paying out long before he needed any of it.
Now to the tough part. If a representative were appointed, it would have been a sibling local to him who has some detailed experience at the fine science of inheriting over and above family objections. This same sibling also caused a good deal of unwarranted disturbance on another occasion. When our mother passed away, a loud and fairly vile attempt was made to gain possession of her weddings rings. This happened on the very day of her sudden death, in their home, and in his very presence. One might chalk this up to grief, but in later years that same sibling also mentioned to me several times (years ago when our father was still young and in good health) that a bank book showing a substantial balance had been snooped, and she hoped to inherit from that savings some day. It nearly goes without saying that this sibling is at the very core of the estrangement. This knowledge of past behavior causes a good bit of distrust on my part. I believe I should have at least been informed timely as to my father's passing, even if it were done through an intermediary or a simple news clipping. This would be true, whether there was a substantial estate or not. I do not wish to get back into personal contact with the family, as I very much doubt this would be in any way productive. However, I have zero compunctions about taking proper steps to protect my own child's possible interests, even if they only exist through me as a sort of passthrough. Is there some way I can find out what was left and what has become of it?
Personally, I have no great interest in any estate (assuming he left one). However, as a parent, I do not feel free to simply ignore a possible estate which could benefit my child. My personal disputes should not become her property loss. My child will almost certainly at least want some small personal momento of her grandfather. I will help my child obtain this much, if I can. I know that a will was made out by my parents when I was a small child myself, and that it was always kept in a metal lockbox, which would have been in my father's physical possession. My mother told me that it was made out to ensure that everything was divided amongst the sibs equally if they were both gone, but she passed away herself, years ago. My father had 100% medical coverage to handle any medical costs, and three substantial pensions - one of which began paying out long before he needed any of it.
Now to the tough part. If a representative were appointed, it would have been a sibling local to him who has some detailed experience at the fine science of inheriting over and above family objections. This same sibling also caused a good deal of unwarranted disturbance on another occasion. When our mother passed away, a loud and fairly vile attempt was made to gain possession of her weddings rings. This happened on the very day of her sudden death, in their home, and in his very presence. One might chalk this up to grief, but in later years that same sibling also mentioned to me several times (years ago when our father was still young and in good health) that a bank book showing a substantial balance had been snooped, and she hoped to inherit from that savings some day. It nearly goes without saying that this sibling is at the very core of the estrangement. This knowledge of past behavior causes a good bit of distrust on my part. I believe I should have at least been informed timely as to my father's passing, even if it were done through an intermediary or a simple news clipping. This would be true, whether there was a substantial estate or not. I do not wish to get back into personal contact with the family, as I very much doubt this would be in any way productive. However, I have zero compunctions about taking proper steps to protect my own child's possible interests, even if they only exist through me as a sort of passthrough. Is there some way I can find out what was left and what has become of it?
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