He wants to adopt my son

What is the name of your state? PA

I have been married to my husband for a year now and we want to begin adoption preceedings for him to adopt my 5 year old son from a previous relationship.

His natural father has not shown any interest in him, although he knows where I live, and has seen him only a few times since he was born, the last time being when he was 11 months old. We were never married and my son carries my last name. He does not pay child support.

How do I begin the proceedings?? Do I need an attorney?? Is it expensive??

By chance, my husband and my son have the same first name. He wants to change his middle name to make him a Jr. Is this possible??

jjacobs852 said:

What is the name of your state? PA

I have been married to my husband for a year now and we want to begin adoption preceedings for him to adopt my 5 year old son from a previous relationship.

His natural father has not shown any interest in him, although he knows where I live, and has seen him only a few times since he was born, the last time being when he was 11 months old. We were never married and my son carries my last name. He does not pay child support.

How do I begin the proceedings?? Do I need an attorney?? Is it expensive??

By chance, my husband and my son have the same first name. He wants to change his middle name to make him a Jr. Is this possible??

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My response:

Is your husband available? I'd like to write to him on this post concerning this matter. So, have him identify himself by his first name, only, and I'll be glad to speak to the both of you. I have a question or two for him first. Just have him click on the "Reply" button, below.

IAAL

Hi IAAL,

My name is John.

jjacobs852 said:

Hi IAAL,

My name is John.

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My response:

Hello, John. Since this post is really about you, what is YOUR LEGAL reason for wanting to adopt your wife's child?

Remember, I'm asking for a "legal" answer, not an "emotional" answer.

IAAL

Oh, I can hardly wait for this one!!!

I have no legal reason behind this decision. I simply love the boy and I want us all to have the same last name. I think that that would make the boy happier to have our last name.

Since you have no REAL reason for doing this, lets start with the first problem you have in this process.
You MUST get the permission from the childs biological father. Get that first, then come back and lets talk.

JETX said:

Since you have no REAL reason for doing this, lets start with the first problem you have in this process.
You MUST get the permission from the childs biological father. Get that first, then come back and lets talk.

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My response:

This is true. You can't adopt the child unless one of two things occur - -

1. The court terminates his parental rights; or

2. The father voluntarily terminates his rights.

However, there's only downsides to adoption of your stepson:

1. Once adopted, he takes from your Estate automatically. You can get around this, without adoption, by providing for him in your Will;

2. Should you and wifey-poo get a divorce, the adoption makes YOU legally responsible for "child support". Remember, adoption makes him "your kid".

Insofar as the last name is concerned, your wife can Petition the court for a name change of her son. You don't need to adopt him for that to occur. Again, she may need to obtain the permission of the kid's father. If not, it's probably not going to happen anyway.

Since you're living with the mother and child anyway, there's really only expensive and time-consuming "downsides" to adoption of your stepson. You don't need to adopt, and there's no legal reason to do so.

Why pay for the cow when you're already drinking the milk?

IAAL

name on birth certificate?

i am Dan yessy's husband. I have been wanting to adopt her son also. i have the same reason as John. my son was the one who started changing his last name at school and brought a note home from teacher to change his name at the office. this made me very . i have one question "does the name of the birth certificate change after the adoption??

IIIIIIFFFFF an adoption occurs, the adopting parent(s) may request a name change as part of the adoption process and the change is simultaneous to the adoption. Please consider the other aspects of the above posts.

Re: name on birth certificate?

yessy said:

i am Dan yessy's husband. I have been wanting to adopt her son also. i have the same reason as John. my son was the one who started changing his last name at school and brought a note home from teacher to change his name at the office. this made me very . i have one question "does the name of the birth certificate change after the adoption??

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**A: oh brother.

TO: jjacobs852

I admire your husband for taking on your son. I too am from PA and in almost the same situation. My son is only 3 though. I have tried to talk with lawyers regarding adoption and they all say to wait. I have been married over a year now and my husband has been with me since the birth of my child. They do tell me it will be expensive, close to $2000 or more. It would well be worth it but the biological father might pose a fit. He doesn't see my son and hasn't since the week he was born. I have also seen in the papers that you advertise in the paper that you are proceeding with the adoption, and if the biological father doesn't respond, you can go on with it. Either way, I wish you the best of luck. I didn't realize you could send a child to school posing a different last name then his real last name? Is this serious?

last name at school

well what my son did was that he started writting my husbands last name as his own instead of his. his teacher asked him why he was doing this and he said that he was changing his last name . his teacher then told him that the parents have to change the information at the school office, she did not know he had done it his self. he got home that day and told us what his teacher said. my husband and i looked at each other and thats when we decided to go through the adoption. we had talked about it before this incident but did not know how my son would feel about it, but i guess he agrees. we told him to keep writting his last name and wait until we change it. to my son there is no other dad than my husband. good luck to you on your case, but hey if the bio dad won't do what he has to than let someone who will