What is the best actions that i can take?

What is the name of your state? West Virginia


had argument with wife and was verbally and physically abusive

with her. Was first time i ever got physically abussive. She got a

order of protection againist me. I love my wife and she loves me and she checked that she did not want a divorce or seperation at this time. she did check that she required that i attend a domestic violence program . what is the best possible way for me to go about this and get my family back together.

extrodinarily desperate,



my court date is dec. 4th
LOVING HUSBAND

start as soon as possible with some counseling either alone or together. there must of been something she or you did for it to get to this point of violence. communication is very important to avoid this problem. i know there is much to stress about in the world, but love can cure many things. hope marriage is a long happy one.but always respect!!! Good luck to the both of you..

Once you go to court, a part of your sentence (should you be found guilty) will probably be to undergo anger management or domestic violence counseling. You'll be given a list of alternatives and the costs of the various programs. Usually this is part of your probation.

Take this seriously. There is no excuse to ever be violent with your spouse.

Once all is said and done, if you and your wife reconcile go together to marriage counseling to help the two of you manage your difficulties and become closer. Good luck.

Does anyone else here notice anything about this person. He did not deny, he admitted he had a bad moment in his life and wants help. That is the first and hardest step to make. You have hope.
As part of your court proceedings you may be able to have the charges deferred by attending a DV workshop or counseling. Take advantage of this. ASK the judge to appoint you counseling to deal with this newfound anger. Judges love a person who takes responsibility for their actions and then asks for help to ensure it does not happen again.
Keep an open mind and seriously search for the answer within yourself as to what was different this time. What caused you to lose control and find a way to deal with it. I know how you feel. I have been on that edge several times in my life with a woman who was abusive towards ME. I never resorted to her level and actions but I surly wanted to.

Keep the faith and realize that as humans we make mistakes. The hard part is admitting them and asking for help and then forgiveness. Your actions will go along way to repairing the relationship. Individual counseling as well as family counseling will be the best road for you to take.
Good luck and remember as long as you are honest with yourself and your wife you can work through the bad times.