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poohbear_1976

Guest
What is the name of your state? va

my boyfriend wants to adopt my 8 month old daughter.my question is,do we have to be married before he can adopt her?we are not married yet,but we will be in the summer of 04.her b/f has not seen her or anything like that.he hasnt even attepted to see her.he does pay child support.that is only because it comes out of his check every week.if it was not for that i would not get anything from him.my boyfriend loves her just like she is his own.he does every thing for her like a father should do for there child.i dont know of we need a lawyer for this case or not.i really need some good advice.so if anyone can help me out i would greatley appriciate it.thanx for reading my post.
 


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REParker819

Guest
I believe you have to be married first. Have you found out why the b/f hasnt seen his child? He may not be so willing to give up his parental rights to her, and the fact that he is paying child support, I doubt the court will take his rights away.

What makes you think you wont break up with this boyfriend too?
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
No court is going to allow a boyfriend to adopt her. More likely, you will have to wait until you are married a period of time, usually at least a year.

As REParker said, either the biofather will have to willingly give up his rights or the court will have to terminate them (this is unlikely for the reason RE stated).

Regarding a lawyer - I personally feel that adoption is not an area to be cheap about and if it's being done, it should be done properly with all i's dotted and t's crossed legally.
 

nextwife

Senior Member
http://www.adoptionsolutions.com/general/state laws/va_law.htm

Excerpts from Virginia Adoption Statute Summary:

Code of Virginia Annotated Sections 63.1-220 to 63.1-238.5 (1997)

Who Can Adopt?
Any natural person who lives in the State may adopt. A married couple must jointly adopt, unless the spouse who is adopting is the stepparent, then the spouse can adopt without the other spouse joining.

Who Can Be Adopted?
Any child can be adopted. A person over the age of 18 can be adopted, if the adoptee: is the stepchild and has lived with the stepparent for 3 months, is the niece or a nephew and has no living parents and has lived with the adoptive parent for 3 months, is the natural child of the adoptive parent and has lived with the adoptive parent for 3 months, or, is at least 15 years younger than the adoptive parent and they have known each other for 5 years and were both residents of the State during that period, and for good cause shown.

Consent to Adoption
The following parties must give written consent to the adoption:

1. the parents of a child born in wedlock, but if the parents are divorced and one of the parents' rights have been terminated, that parent does not have to consent to the adoption;
2. the parents of a child born out of wedlock;
3. the child-placing agency or other agency having custody of the child; and
4. the adoptee who is 14 years of age or older, unless the court waives the adoptee's consent
5. If the court finds that the consent of any person is withheld contrary to the best interest of the child or if personal service is unattainable then the court may waive the consent
The consent of the father of a child born out of wedlock is not required if
1. the identity of the father is not readily ascertainable; or
2. he is given notice and fails to object to the adoption.
the court finds that any required consent is withheld contrary to the best interests of the child, the court may grant the adoption without the consent. Consent can be given 10 days after the birth of the child.

Parental consent to adoption is revocable prior to the final order of adoption if it is proven that the consent was given under fraud or duress or if both the adoptive parents and the biological parents approve of revocation of consent.
 

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