step-father wants to adopt son

What is the name of your state? Michigan

The man I am married to is not the biological father of my son, who is almost 7-years-old. However, he has raised my son, provided for him, loved him like his own for about 5 years. My son has not seen his biological father in over 5 years and has no memory of him. He has never paid a dime in support, I believe he is in arreage for somewhere to the tune of $20,000. What can we do to arrange for my son to be adopted in the state of Michigan? Is there any way to make the process easier and /or expediate the process? How do you find an absent parent to have them agree to termination of rights? What can be done if he refuses, even after all of this time? I mainly am looking for information to be prepared for what is to come over the next few months. Also, how do you find a good family law attorney to help with this process?
Thank you in advance to whomever can help!!

My response:

What is the LEGAL advantage to your husband to adopt YOUR son?

IAAL

So there is never a knock on the door from a man who is a complete stranger to my son, saying he's his dad, when the person who is dad is the man that has taken care of him his whole life. Are there no legal advantages to adopting him? Wouldn't it be emotionally healthy for my son to see the man's name who raised him on his birth certificate? I know that these decisions are being made for a child who is to young to understand or have an opinion on, but, when he is older he will be privy to this info and hopefully use what he has been taught to make an informative decision as to what he wants to do. I don't know the "right" answers while he is this young, I'm just trying to do the best thing for my son.

This is something you will definately want an attorney for so pull out that phone book and start getting consultations on the laws of your state and fees they charge. Look up Termination of Parental Rights in a search engine and find the laws for Michgan. Most states are one year no contact, no support and even if parent fought the adoption it can be made without their agreement. I am in this process RIGHT NOW(papers are being sent off today) and if all goes well it can be done within about 3 months. Also prepare for the welfare department to visit your house, look around and interview everyone involved.

How do you find a good, capable attorney? There are literally thousands in my phone book, and for the amount of money I am prepared to spend, I want to be sure that I pick one that will do the best job for us. I know that they deal with this stuff everyday and it becomes "commonplace", but this is the one and only time I will go through this, and I want to be sure it is done properly.

Been there....

You don't necessarily have to get an attorney. If the absent parent's whereabouts is unknown, that will make it much easier. I would suggest going to a paralegal. It will save you a lot of money and primarily all you have to do is fill out the paperwork, and run an ad in the paper to see if anyone contests it. Of course, this is a different state, so the laws may be different. However, this is all that is required for my husband to adopt my daughter. Best of luck!

State-Specific Information Search Results: Michigan

Grounds for Termination of Parental Rights for this State
Statute: § 712A.19b(1),(3),(6)

Circumstances That Are Grounds for Termination:

Abandonment or Extreme Parental Disinterest

Abuse/Neglect

Felony Conviction/Incarceration

Failure of Reasonable Efforts

Abuse/Neglect or Loss of Rights of Another Child

Sexual Abuse

Failure to Maintain Contact

Failure to Provide Support

Child Judged in Need of Services/Dependent

Child's Best Interest

Felony assault of child or sibling

Murder/Manslaughter of sibling child

Thought this might be helpful...Good Luck!!