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Is this contempt?

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gottadoit

Guest
What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? TN

Documents filed with the court to date include Order of Protection and Complaint for Divorce (hearing set for August 17, 2004).

From OOP: THE COURT HEREBY ORDERS: That the above named Respondent be restrained from committing further acts of abuse or threats of abuse against petitioner or petitioner's minor children. IT IS FURTHER ORDERED AS FOLLOWS: Respondent shall have supervised visitation with the parties minor children at the following times: Supervised visitation by his father or brother at agreed time.

From Complaint for Divorce: NOTICE OF INJUNCTION Pursuant to Tenn. Code Ann. 36-4-106(d), the following applies when a petition for divorce or legal seperation is filed:
(3) An injunction restraining both parties from harassing, threatening, assaulting or abusing the other and from making disparaging remarks about the other to or in the presence of any children of the parties or to either party's employer.


If respondent tells a minor child:
1) Son, I'm gonna tell ya straight, your mom is being a bitch.
2) I can have her put in jail if she doesn't provide transportation down here, she has the vehicles. I don't want to have to do that, but I can have her put in jail, you understand?
3) Son, I don't know why she's being so mean, but God will deal with her.
4) Boys, pick up the phone, your momma hung up on me cause she can't be a woman and stand her ground. (that's on the answering machine)


Questions:
1. If the OOP and Complaint for Divorce do not specifically address transportation to and from visitation, am I obligated to take them or have someone from my family take them; am I in contempt if I ask his family to share transportation?

2. Is he in contempt? And can I do anything if I don't have "legal" proof? The above statements are on a tape where I was taping me and the boys and their dad on a speaker phone conversation trying to arrange phone calls, to keep respondent from calling here 4 and 5 times a night to talk to the boys. After I got off the line and took it off speaker, the statements were made.
 


stealth2

Under the Radar Member
So you taped his statements to the kids? Did he give consent to the conversation being taped?
 
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gottadoit

Guest
No, Stealth, he didn't. He doesn't have to consent for me to tape my conversation with him, and when I got off the line, I didn't stop the tape.
 
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stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Then none of that is even remotely usable in court. (btw, judges really don't like taping of the conversations between the other parent and kids.) The message on the answering machine - perhaps. But did the kids hear it?
 
G

gottadoit

Guest
Yes, they heard that message. There is also a message on my cell phone that he would call the law and go "get his boys" if I didn't bring them down there (they were visiting their grandfather). I called the sherriff's office to ask if an officer would run his name before they did anything like that and I was assured the office would find the Order of Protection information.

Do you have an opinion about the first question?
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
If the order doesn't mention it, then you don't likely have to do anything. If he takes it to court, the judge may or may not order you to either provide all or part of the transportation.

As for what he says to you on the cell phone - he's not restricted from what he says unless it is a blatant threat against you. (edit - I WOULD, however, provide any caregiver a certified copy of the OOP)

The message on the answering machine - did they hear it while he was leaving it, or after?
 
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frylover

Senior Member
Not a lawyer, but from what I have read here, you are required to do what is in the court order--no more, no less. If you don't have a court order requiring you to provide transporatation you don't have to.

And on a personal note, my sympathy to you for having such an ass for an ex. I really hope you can figure out a way to legally prove what he is doing.
 
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gottadoit

Guest
While he was leaving it. My youngest son picked the phone up when he said that they would have to tell him Saturday if I was keeping them from getting to the phone (I've never stopped either of them from talking or calling him).

If he threatens to have me arrested for something that isn't against the law, is that considered a threat or a bluff? So far since the OOP he said he would have police in front of my house if I took the boys to visit my sister, and would have me put in jail if I didn't bring the kids (said that twice). Is that considered threats? Or harrassment? And how do you go about proving it happened unless you use a voicemail they left, or my word against his? Everybody tells me "He's violating that order...turn him in". But I don't know how I'm supposed to be able to prove anything.

I appreciate your time this morning. Any advice you can offer is appreciated.
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
He can threaten stuff like that, I'm pretty sure. So you keep a copy of the court order and the OOP and let him do as he likes. If he said "bring the boys or I'll come and kill you" - that would be something different.

If it's on voicemail, take the phone to your lawyer and have him/her listen to it. Find out how to best handle getting the info out of voicemail and into a transcript. Check with Radio Shack to see if there's any easy way/device to record that voicemail (thinking aloud - pick up your voicemail from your home phone w/the answering machine on and tape it onto there).
 
G

gottadoit

Guest
Thank you both.

(Warning: emotional statement coming. He's a drug addict. It started a few years ago. I was convinced I could help him fix it for his sake and our families sake. Finally accepted he wasn't going to get better and filed for divorce.

I offered to bring the boys to visit today and he said he had "things to do" and I couldn't bring them until tomorrow. Today is payday. I'm living in bizzaro world, but it sure does help to get advice from other people who can give me objective opinions. Thank you again.)
 

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