N
new_home_owner
Guest
What is the name of your state?What is the name of your state? Michigan
I am looking for the best way to avoid problems with a man who lives down the street and whom I believe to be paranoid and potentially dangerous. I doubt that any legal action is yet necessary or even possible; I'm hoping very much to keep things from ever getting to that level.
Let me begin with the immediate cause for my concern and then I will fill in some background. I'll try to be as brief as possible but please bear with me.
Yesterday, as I drove past this man's house on my way to the store, I had to slow down, almost to a stop because two small children had run out from his driveway and into the road. He was in the driveway but close to the house. I waved or nodded to him and then as I started to pull away he began yelling at me. I was able to hear him say “you don't even live on this street” and then he went on to accuse me of trying to get (in a sexual way) the little girl who couldn't be more than 3 or 4 years old. I cannot remember his exact words and I was driving away but I'm pretty sure he said something about me trying to “get a piece of that thin a**” and pointing at her. Not thinking through my reaction (I was quite surprised by this after all) I said something like “the hell I don't” -- referring to my living on the street (which I do, since about 2 months ago) -- and I drove off. Not the best reaction, I know, but it was a reaction and he probably did not hear as I was turning the corner atht time. Later, when I came back from the store he and the children were gone or at least not in the yard.
Now for some background. I first really became aware of this man as I was showing the house to my parents, after we had closed on the house but before moving in. He was sitting in his pickup truck, in the driveway by the road and he had several pornographic or nearly pornographic (one was clearly a Victoria's Secret catalogue) magazines arranged on his windshield opened and facing out. There were no children around at the time. I called the police (not knowing if this was actually illegal) and found out that several people had already called and that they had sent an officer.
Since we moved in he has not had the magazines out but he does do other strange things. He's often in his yard or driveway. Whenever I drive by I try to be friendly and wave or nod. He has a habit of putting hand-written cardboard signs in his yard, house and trees. Examples are: “No child support”, “No Nuts”, “I Don't Care”, “Hunt Club” (there is a condo/apt complex down another road a bit called Hunt Club but I'm not sure if it the same), and a few other longer and/or unreadable signs I either couldn't make out or understand. Usually there are 2-3 signs at a time. This morning he has a new long one that says something about him having a real woman now, something about honking and a reference to "crack" and it ends by saying to leave him alone – beyond that the rest didn't seem to make sense. Although "crack" refer to the drug it seemed more likely part of an expression of some sort.
One day he also had a strange doll in the yard (I think it was the scarecrow from Bob the Builder cartoon) in what appeared to be an obsene position (it looked to orally pleasuring itself by means of a black rod placed between its legs).
The children seem to only be there on some weekends so I'm assuming he has partial custody. Also, he has a large pit bull type dog (which in fairness seems well behaved and trained), and if it matters he often dresses like a drug dealer or pimp (he is about 50 years old) but a lot of people dress that way. I'm not sure what he does or if he has a job but he has a pretty nice new larger pickup truck and his house cost more than mine at $147k so he has to have some job to secure a mortgage. He moved into the house a month or so before I moved into mine so he's been there about 4 months.
My question is how I should react to his yelling at me. What worries me is that he seems to recognize me and/or my vehicle enough to accuse me of not living on the street. I do live on the street and I have two small boys and a wife. I do live about a quarter mile down from him so we can't see each other from our respective yards, only when I drive to work or on numerous trips to the hardware store (I'm fixing up the house). Besides this guy, this is fairly modest yet still pretty decent neighborhood (most homes are in the $120k - $180k range with a lot of retirees). This sort of thing was certainly not something I would expect here, but I suppose mental illness can effect all income levels.
So do I go down and introduce myself, tell him I do live on the street and somehow try to alleviate his apparent fear of me? If he seemed a little less scary I would assume this to be the correct way to go. He's just scary enough (esp. w/ the dog) to make me hesitate.
Another option is to just avoid him for awhile. There are alternative routes to my house that do not take me by his. This seems the easy solution but I don't want to have to hide on my own street.
I could also continue the way I am, perhaps not waving/nodding to him anymore. Maybe then he'd figure out I simply live on the street rather than watching him or whatever else he thinks. The problem with this or avoiding him is it might allow his paranoia of me to grow.
One thing I thought of doing is talking to someone at the police dept. I'm not sure if this is really their job, but I figure they probably deal with people like him more than anyone most of us and they might be able to advise me. Also, it makes them a little more aware of him and perhaps it will make them drive by once in a while.
My main concern is that he either follows me home one day or otherwise recognizes my vehicle in my own driveway. Not knowing how his mind operates or what strange connection he makes, I'm more than a little concerned about my family's safety. I've done nothing to precipitate his actions besides drive by his house and occasionally wave/nod.
Any advise on this will be most appreciated.
Thank you.
I am looking for the best way to avoid problems with a man who lives down the street and whom I believe to be paranoid and potentially dangerous. I doubt that any legal action is yet necessary or even possible; I'm hoping very much to keep things from ever getting to that level.
Let me begin with the immediate cause for my concern and then I will fill in some background. I'll try to be as brief as possible but please bear with me.
Yesterday, as I drove past this man's house on my way to the store, I had to slow down, almost to a stop because two small children had run out from his driveway and into the road. He was in the driveway but close to the house. I waved or nodded to him and then as I started to pull away he began yelling at me. I was able to hear him say “you don't even live on this street” and then he went on to accuse me of trying to get (in a sexual way) the little girl who couldn't be more than 3 or 4 years old. I cannot remember his exact words and I was driving away but I'm pretty sure he said something about me trying to “get a piece of that thin a**” and pointing at her. Not thinking through my reaction (I was quite surprised by this after all) I said something like “the hell I don't” -- referring to my living on the street (which I do, since about 2 months ago) -- and I drove off. Not the best reaction, I know, but it was a reaction and he probably did not hear as I was turning the corner atht time. Later, when I came back from the store he and the children were gone or at least not in the yard.
Now for some background. I first really became aware of this man as I was showing the house to my parents, after we had closed on the house but before moving in. He was sitting in his pickup truck, in the driveway by the road and he had several pornographic or nearly pornographic (one was clearly a Victoria's Secret catalogue) magazines arranged on his windshield opened and facing out. There were no children around at the time. I called the police (not knowing if this was actually illegal) and found out that several people had already called and that they had sent an officer.
Since we moved in he has not had the magazines out but he does do other strange things. He's often in his yard or driveway. Whenever I drive by I try to be friendly and wave or nod. He has a habit of putting hand-written cardboard signs in his yard, house and trees. Examples are: “No child support”, “No Nuts”, “I Don't Care”, “Hunt Club” (there is a condo/apt complex down another road a bit called Hunt Club but I'm not sure if it the same), and a few other longer and/or unreadable signs I either couldn't make out or understand. Usually there are 2-3 signs at a time. This morning he has a new long one that says something about him having a real woman now, something about honking and a reference to "crack" and it ends by saying to leave him alone – beyond that the rest didn't seem to make sense. Although "crack" refer to the drug it seemed more likely part of an expression of some sort.
One day he also had a strange doll in the yard (I think it was the scarecrow from Bob the Builder cartoon) in what appeared to be an obsene position (it looked to orally pleasuring itself by means of a black rod placed between its legs).
The children seem to only be there on some weekends so I'm assuming he has partial custody. Also, he has a large pit bull type dog (which in fairness seems well behaved and trained), and if it matters he often dresses like a drug dealer or pimp (he is about 50 years old) but a lot of people dress that way. I'm not sure what he does or if he has a job but he has a pretty nice new larger pickup truck and his house cost more than mine at $147k so he has to have some job to secure a mortgage. He moved into the house a month or so before I moved into mine so he's been there about 4 months.
My question is how I should react to his yelling at me. What worries me is that he seems to recognize me and/or my vehicle enough to accuse me of not living on the street. I do live on the street and I have two small boys and a wife. I do live about a quarter mile down from him so we can't see each other from our respective yards, only when I drive to work or on numerous trips to the hardware store (I'm fixing up the house). Besides this guy, this is fairly modest yet still pretty decent neighborhood (most homes are in the $120k - $180k range with a lot of retirees). This sort of thing was certainly not something I would expect here, but I suppose mental illness can effect all income levels.
So do I go down and introduce myself, tell him I do live on the street and somehow try to alleviate his apparent fear of me? If he seemed a little less scary I would assume this to be the correct way to go. He's just scary enough (esp. w/ the dog) to make me hesitate.
Another option is to just avoid him for awhile. There are alternative routes to my house that do not take me by his. This seems the easy solution but I don't want to have to hide on my own street.
I could also continue the way I am, perhaps not waving/nodding to him anymore. Maybe then he'd figure out I simply live on the street rather than watching him or whatever else he thinks. The problem with this or avoiding him is it might allow his paranoia of me to grow.
One thing I thought of doing is talking to someone at the police dept. I'm not sure if this is really their job, but I figure they probably deal with people like him more than anyone most of us and they might be able to advise me. Also, it makes them a little more aware of him and perhaps it will make them drive by once in a while.
My main concern is that he either follows me home one day or otherwise recognizes my vehicle in my own driveway. Not knowing how his mind operates or what strange connection he makes, I'm more than a little concerned about my family's safety. I've done nothing to precipitate his actions besides drive by his house and occasionally wave/nod.
Any advise on this will be most appreciated.
Thank you.
Here in CA, The Housing & Urban Development Dept via Section 8 housing codes moves large numbers of people like your neighbor into ALL OF our middle class neighborhoods. We peaceful, neighborly, law-abiding citizens have learned our legal recourse: