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garren

Guest
What is the name of your state? idaho
seperated from my husband May of 04, we were agreed on property div.
and child custody. I met a man in June of 04, I did move in with him.
My estranged husband, is now wanting everything including the children.
I lost my job in July. A tempory custody order was done in August. I have
the children with me for now. I have to drive them to school in another town
40 miles away, due to the judge in the case did not approve of me with
another man. I cannot get a job working any real hours due to I have to
drop and pick up my boys from school. The husband will not cooperate
at all, I have proposed many parenting plans and property div. He doesn't
want to pay child support at all. We were to have a home evaluation done
but the evaluator declined the case due to busy work schedule. Now we
are both out of money, our lawyers pretty much state that until they get
some money, we are doing the waiting game, or until someone bends
and agrees to something. I have hardly any of my things from the house
we once owned, I have a vehicle that does not run, that he owned when
we got married. I am living with another man, my children are safe and happy
for the first time in a long time. I am also happy after many years of abuse and horrible experiences. I have no other place to go and no
money at this time. I need some advice on if there is a way to get this
thing done, or if I can get some of my property. Also, about a vehicle,he has the one we purchased during the marriage. I cannot afford my
lawyer any longer, but I do not want to mess up and lose my children.
What options do I have in this state and how do I go about it? It is going on
6 months now, and I want my children in a school closer to home and have
stability in their lives.
 


S

stevewilson

Guest
Children first!!!

Why are you subjecting your children to another man 1 month after the fact.
Forget the men untill your children grown and raised. Not a good example to set. :confused:
 

stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Do you have family that could help you? I would look into what sort of state aid you might have available, including for housing. Look into afterschool care for your kids - most school districts have some type of program available. If that's not available, look into part-time work during their school hours. You absolutely need to find a stable situation for yourself and your kids if you hope to maintain custody. And I have to agree with the previous poster that moving in with another man a month after separating (and it sounds as though there is yet ANOTHER that you're now living with?) isn't the most stable of situations.
 
I don't mean to sound like I'm repeating but you need to be very careful right now in what you do as it will effect your divorce and the custody of your kids. You need to move out and be on your own, period. Your kids need both you and your husband right now (regardless of how much pain you feel they feel as much or more as they're caught in the middle - don't forget that!!!!) The best thing for you is living on your own, BE SINGLE and show that you can be stable providing for your kids financially, physically and EMOTIONALLY. Separating and moving in with another guy a month later, whether you like it or not, makes you look like a cheap tramp that only cares for yourself and not your kids. It also screams of the possibility that you were cheating on your husband. Regardless of the kind of the person you actually are doesn't matter to the judge as he/she is looking at your actions now. The judge doesn't know you and doesn't care. The judge's job is to decide who gets what and what is best for the kids. It doesn't take a rocket scientist to know that parent's splitting up is extremely tough on the kids (no matter how good or bad their dad is) but it's just down right cruel to then expose them to a live in when their foundation has just crumbled. Along those same lines, don't forget about yourself - your world has just crumbled as well. As you're not a horse, I don't think the best way to approach it to 'get right back on'. As far as the custody of your kids go the only thing the judge can do is to look at what you're doing now. What he'll see at this point is separating from your kid's father, meeting another man and moving in with him a month later. Any way you slice it, it wasn't a smart decision to make for the sake of your divorce, you or your kids.
 

VeronicaGia

Senior Member
When and if the judge changes his decision, you can change the childrens school. Until then you are obligated to follow the court order. If you go ahead and change their school anyway, a judge may decide to change custody to your soon to be ex.

You seem to be more worried about his car and your new beau than anything.
 

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