adopting my stepchildren

What is the name of your state? Ohio
AT THE RISK OF SOUNDING LIKE A HOMEWRECKER, MY HUSBAND AND I GOT TOGETHER AHILE HIS WIFE WAS PREGNANT. SHE GAVE US CUSTODY OF THE THREE GIRLS AND GAVE ME THE BABY WHEN SHE WAS 4 WEEKS OLD. SHE HAD SUPERVISED VISITS- PER CHILDRENS SERVICES- BECAUSE SHE WAS UNFIT TO PROVIDE FOR THEM. SHE THEN MOVED TO LOUISIANNA AND AFTER TWO YEARS SHE HASNT HAD ANY PHYSICAL CONTACT WITH THE FOUR GIRLS. THE YONGEST TWO DO NOT EVEN KNOW HER BECAUSE THEY WERE SO YOUNG. SHE DOES CALL FROM TIME TO TIME AND TELL THEM SOME LIES, BUT REFUSES TO PAY SUPPORT AND HAS NO INTEREST IN THEIR LIVES. I WANT TO HAVE HER PARENTAL RIGHTS TERMINATED ON THE GROUNDS OF ABANDONMENT AND EXTREME DIS-INTEREST. CAN I DO THIS WITHOUT AN ATTORNEY IF I HAVE THE PROPER PAPERWORK? I KNOW THE GROUNDS ARE THERE AND EVENTUALLY I WILL ADOPT THEM, BUT RIGHT NOW THAT WOMAN COULD POP INTO OHIO AND TAKE CHILDREN OUT OF MY HOME ANDPUT THEIR LIVES IN LIMBO, ALONG WITH MINE. AM I BEING SELFISH OR IS THIS REALLY IN THE KIDS BEST INTEREST? THE OLDEST TWO WANT ME TO ADOPT THEM. HELP ME.
WANTING IT ALL

The calls do count as contact but some states have laws set up to be able ignore superficial contacts. I don't know about Ohio laws. You'll need to contact an attorney.
Do you think that she would be willing to give up custody of them? If so, she just needs to give her consent and the children can be adopted. If not, you'll have to prove her unfit which doesn't sound to hard. Also if the two oldest are old enough a judge can take their wants into account as well.

It would be in your best interests to get an attorney and find out the laws there.

Sarah

The first step is to have your husband file for SOLE CUSTODY if the current custody arrangement is based on their agreement, due to the circumstances he is likely to be granted that even if she shows up in court, her history of abandonment would be hard to overcome. That should ease your mind about her showing up and taking the children if they have joint custody. If she has failed to pay court orderd child support, she is unlikely to contest the matter and risk going to jail.

I WANT TO HAVE HER PARENTAL RIGHTS TERMINATED ON THE GROUNDS OF ABANDONMENT AND EXTREME DIS-INTEREST. CAN I DO THIS WITHOUT AN ATTORNEY IF I HAVE THE PROPER PAPERWORK?

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You can't do this even with an attorney, even after all of the other posts.