Guardian Ad Litem

What is the name of your state? South Carolina

When our daughter's ex-boyfriend decided he wanted to be involved in her son's life, the court appointed a private guardian ad litem. She was not informed that it would be such an astronomical fee and at the final hearing the judge told her to pay 2/3 of the fee because the father had to come into court to be able to spend time with his son, which was totally false. But anyway, she got the bill and being a single parent she could not pay all of it. She and I together tried to document all of the time that the guardian put into the case and just could not make the time equal the service. So she tried to make small payments but the guardian threated contempt and we the parents borrowed money and paid the fee. I asked twice for a reciept with an itemized bill and have not received anything as of today. We do not agree with her business actions and know that this is probably a lost cause . Do any of you have any suggestions about how we could let someone know how dissatisfied we are and how the GAL handled things.

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This is my first time here, I live in California and went to court and was granted Guardianship of my Grandson 2yrs ago. My question is this what is
the difference between Guardianship and Custody?? The father always uses
the term "you just have guadianship" he saids this like it's really nothing. But
the court said we have him till he's 18yrs. Please will someone explain the difference to me... Thank You faymoorr.

When we were assigned a law guardian in NY (essentially the same as a GAL elsewhere), it was a set fee that she received - it was in no way based on how much time she spent on the case.

stealth2 said:

When we were assigned a law guardian in NY (essentially the same as a GAL elsewhere), it was a set fee that she received - it was in no way based on how much time she spent on the case.

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Its very state specific. In many states its a set fee...in other states the GAL is paid by the hour, just like an attorney....and I have seen some doozies of cases where the GAL has seriously abused the billing. One GAL even refused to stay out of an appelate case even when BOTH parents attempted to terminate her services.....and racked up over 10 grand in "billable" hours. Luckily the trial court judge struck her down eventually, but not until she had actually taken the parents to collections.

I believe you are confused as to what the GAL does and who they represent.
The GAL was appointed because there was a problem and it affects the best needs of the child. The GAL represents the child, not the parents. They do many things of which you are not aware. If you and your daughter had followed the court's orders re visitation then she would not have been in the place of a GAL being appointed. There is nothing wrong with the father exercising his rights to visitation and for that visitation to be without interference. You and your daughter are under the impression, based upon your previoust posts, the her rights, then your rights come first and that there is something wrong because the father wants to have a relationship with his child. It isn't a place for playing games and apparently the judge is trying to make a point by billing 2/3 to your daughter because it is her fault that visitation became a problem. She doesn't get a free ride because she is a single mother, there are consequences to interfering with visitation.

Back in August you first wrote in because custody was an issue with your daughter working nights and you basically were raising her child, no wonder the father is saying he wants his child more. Why should he be third after you? https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=192430 same for the vacation issue. There is a set schedule now everyone can make their plans well in advance, if this year your grandchild can't go with you on vacation because it's his Dad's time, you don't make him sad because he's not going with his Papa, you let him be excited because he's going on Vacation with his Daddy. Is that a part of why the GAL was appointed?

south carolina

I guess I haven't made myself very clear on this subject. First of all, the father has always had visitation rights since he decided he wanted them. He has actually had as much or more than a father who was married to the mother and was there from day one. My daughter and I don't see this as our rights first, we only do what is best for the child. The GAL was appointed from the court because of a name change issue. The father began to use this as a game against the mother, with custody threats everytime she didn't do exactly what he requested. The GAL was not appointed for vacation issues, as a matter of fact, our daughter has not even told her son about any vacation time with us, the grandparents, because she knows he cannot go.

Vistation was never a problem, the problem was that the father did not want to work slowly with the little boy to build a relationship with him before taking him off to strange places and to strange people. My grandson had a problem with stranger anxiety when all of this started but no one seemed to really care about that as long as the father's rights were recognised.

My daughter has not had a free ride in anything, she works nights and tries to go to school and spend time with her son. That is a pretty heavy load to carry single or married.

I'm not confused about GAL because I have had the training myself and I know that this GAL did not do everything that she should have done for $200/hour .

It doesn't matter if he was married or not to determine the amount of visitation. If he was there from the begining, why are you claiming that he should be introduced to the child at the begining? For someone who claims to have had training as a GAL you don't understand the basic concepts. Yes you have issues and see the father's rights as coming last, you have had questions here about those issues and received advice, so don't claim that you and your daughter had no issue with vacation.

Was that you or your daughter posting then? https://forum.freeadvice.com/showthread.php?t=215838

mommom1 said:

south carolina
Thanks but guess what? He is being a jerk. My son and I have to go on vacation with my parents because of my income. They pay for their week a year in advance, my son loves this vacation and the father knows that, so he is bucking it by saying that "it clearly states he has first choice this year" I don't think it is that clear. I don't know how to explain to my son that he can't go to the beach with his papa if the father bucks it. Any suggestions? I just cannot afford another court battle.

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Why do you feel the need to try to deceive us? Now you claim, "The GAL was not appointed for vacation issues, as a matter of fact, our daughter has not even told her son about any vacation time with us, the grandparents, because she knows he cannot go." So are you telling the child they cannot go with you? You and his mother need to encourage the child to have a good relationship with his Daddy and quit taking advantage of your time with him to influence him.

The GAL was appointed because the parents could not cooporate in the child's best interest, you don't like the fact that your interference is all to obvious. You are not the first person to interfere with the relationship between parent and child, you won't be the last. If you care about your daughter and grandchild, you will start being less possessive and think about the child best interest.


Your daughter is still working nights and the child living with you, don't you think that may have some bearing on what the judge rules? You don't like the judges ruling and have no respect for the court, that's too bad that your beliefs and lack of objectivity adversley affect your grandson. There is a real possiblity his father could eventually win custody and your daughter have visitation and pay him child support if you continue to interfere with the father's rights or relationship with his child.

south carolina

no deception, my daughter used my user name for some information. She and the father resolved the vacation problem. There was never a court issue about vacation, she just misunderstood the wording on the document but after she understood it better she called him back and apologized.

I do understand the guidelines for a GAL.

The father was NOT in the picture in the beginning. The GAL was appointed for a name change issue that was resolved. I am a caregiver for my grandchild, she pays me to keep him when she is working.

I do not get involved with the father and mother on decisions. I was just asking some questions. I don't even talk to the man. Our daughter will ask us from time to time for advise or help and we try to do what we can.

Thanks but no thanks for anymore advise or comments, we are doing just fine.

Nice try, but no cigar,

mommom1 said:

south carolina

no deception, my daughter used my user name for some information. She and the father resolved the vacation problem. There was never a court issue about vacation, she just misunderstood the wording on the document but after she understood it better she called him back and apologized.

I do understand the guidelines for a GAL. NO you do not and that is affecting your daughter and grandchild.

The father was NOT in the picture in the beginning. Really, that's not what you said earlier in this thread, now how do explain that other than you are being deceptive!

mommom1 said:

south carolina
... First of all, the father has always had visitation rights since he decided he wanted them. He has actually had as much or more than a father who was married to the mother and was there from day one.

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That would be at least 50/50, now you change your story, THAT IS WHY THE GAL IS INVOLVED NOT JUST FOR THE NAME ISSUE! You have been writing this forum for months complaining about how unfair all this is to your daughter and you and how she is geting an unfair deal because she is a single mother.

The GAL was appointed for a name change issue that was resolved. I am a caregiver for my grandchild, she pays me to keep him when she is working.

I do not get involved with the father and mother on decisions. I was just asking some questions. I don't even talk to the man. Our daughter will ask us from time to time for advise or help and we try to do what we can.

Thanks but no thanks for anymore advise or comments, we are doing just fine.

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NO you are not just fine and you are overinvolved and interfering with your grandchild's relationship with his father whether or not you speak with him.

I am ending this discussion, it is going nowhere. The GAL has been paid off and is not involved anymore.