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why can't i see my grandson

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chandlersgramma

Junior Member
What is the name of your state?MI I have a 18 mos old grandson that i have seen just once. The parents (my son) had decided to tell me about him after he was 5 mos old. I feel they used him to dangle in front of me like a puppet and let me be aware of his presence and then tell me I may not see him. My son has not spoke to me in three years, why I don't know, he will not say and chooses to not resolve what ever issues there are between us. I do know he holds the divorce of me and his father over my head. That was 10 years ago and he was fine up until three years ago when he became involved with the mother of the baby. They are not married and live together. I communicate occasionally with the mother, but she acts like she knows everything and is very judgemental of me and the mistakes I have made, (divorcing my son's father is the cause of all of this). Although she only hears his side of the story, she acts for him, thinks for him and speaks for him because he is not man enough to face me and tell me why we don't speak. I have begged him to forgive me and act like an adult now that he is 22 and resolve this issue. He refuses, and has his fathers characteristics as far as not facing problems and dealing with them. His attitude was leave it alone it will be there tomorrow.
 


ENASNI

Senior Member
Look Nana

I am sorry to say this, but just read your post, you still sound bitter.
It is their choice, you basically don't have any rights.

Someone might waltz in here and tell you can try to file for some, but
they have a choice who they want around their child.

And a bitter woman wouldn't be mine.
Sorry, but thats how you sound.
 

chandlersgramma

Junior Member
Who are you to judge me, saying I am bitter. What does that mean. I don't see my grandson but my ex husband does because he is the bitter one on the divorce and has not gotten on with his life like I have. My son is denying me to see my grandchild, wouldn't you be bitter about that. It is a sad situaion and you don't know the half of it so please don't judge!
 

MandyD

Member
Regardless of all the extraneous stuff you wrote, your question was why can't I see my grandson? The answer is because his parents say so. You have NO rights.
 

Ambr

Senior Member
Hope this is helpful......

Grandparent Visitation
Michigan's New Grandparent Visitation Law
On January 3, 2005, Governor Granholm signed into law a new grandparent visitation law which takes effect immediately and creates new rights for grandparents and grandchildren in the State of Michigan to be able to have contact with each other under certain circumstances, if that relationship has been denied following the death, divorce, children born out of wedlock, or other family dysfunction.

This law will creates new rights for grandparents, following the Michigan Supreme Court decision of Derose v. Derose decided July 31, 2003, which held Michigan's old law unconstitutional. In that Michigan Supreme Court decision, the high court asked the Michigan legislature to redraft Michigan¹s law and insert new provisions in order to make Michigan's law constitutional so that grandparents and grandchildren would have access to see each other under these circumstances.

This new law provides the safeguards required by the Michigan Supreme Court, which would protect parental rights, as guaranteed by the Constitution, while setting in place standards for grandparents who have been denied seeing their grandchildren and gives them an opportunity to come to court and show why they should have a right to see their grandchildren, if that request has been unreasonably denied.

Standing
The new law provides grandparents, in the following circumstances, rights to request relief from the courts to see their grandchildren, if they have been denied visitation by a parent:

If there is a divorce, separate maintenance, or annulment action pending between the child¹s parents, or such an action has already been finalized.
The grandchild was born out-of-wedlock and the parents are not living together. However, this only applies, to grandparents of the alleged father if he has been declared legally to be the father of the child by a proper court proceeding and the child's father provides child support in accordance with his ability to provide sup-port or care for his child.
Legal custody of the child has been given to a person other than the child's parent or the child does not live in the parent's home (other than a child who has been adopted by a person who is not the child's stepparent).
A grandparent has taken care of a grandchild during the year before they request visitation, whether or not they have done so by a valid court order.
The child's parent, who is a child of the grandparent, is deceased. If a grandparent falls into any of the above categories and has been denied visitation, they would have a right to bring an action in the court that has heard a prior action (such as a divorce or paternity action). If there has been no prior action filed in the court, then a new action would have to be brought in the circuit court in the county where the grand-child resides. Any person, who has legal custody, or an order for parenting time of the child, must be given notice of the grandparent visitation request.
Hearing
A hearing will be granted on a grandparent's request in the circuit court/family division assigned to the case. At the hearing, the court will presume that a "fit" parent's decision to deny a grandparent visitation request does not create harm to the child (mental, physical or emotional health). The grandparent who is requesting visitation has the duty to show the court by a preponderance of the evidence (51% or more) that the parent's decision to deny visitation to the grandparent does create harm, either mental, physical, or to the emotional health, of the child. If the grandparent does not prove this to the court, by a preponderance of proof, the court will dismiss the grandparent's petition. But, if the court is convinced that the denial of visitation has the potential to create a risk of harm either to the physical, mental or emotional health of the child, then the court will follow a set of factors in determining what amount of grandparent visitation would be in the child's best interest.

Standards the Court Will Follow in Determining The Amount of Grandparent Visitation
In determining the amount of and duration of grandparenting time that a court will allow, if the court believes the grandparent has overcome the presumption of a fit parent, the court will look to the following set of factors and consider all of them in making its decision:

The love, affection, and other emotional ties existing between the grandparent and the child.
The length and quality of the prior relationship between the child and the grand-parent, the role performed by the grandparent, and the existing emotional ties of the child to the grandparent.
The grandparent's moral fitness.
The grandparent's mental and physical health.
The child's reasonable preference, if the court considers the child to be of sufficient age to express a preference.
The effect on the child of hostility between the grandparent and the parent of the child.
The willingness of the grandparent, except in the case of abuse or neglect, to encourage a close relationship between the child and the parent or parents of the child.
Any history of physical, emotional, or sexual abuse or neglect of any child by the grandparent.
Whether the parent's decision to deny, or lack of an offer of, grandparenting time is related to the child's well-being or is for some other unrelated reason.
Any other factor relevant to the physical and psychological well-being of the child.
If the court has determined that a grandparent has met the standard for rebutting the presumption, the court may refer the grandparent's request for visitation to mediation or to the friend of the court to attempt to resolve any dispute. Otherwise the court will decide the issue itself.

Agreement of Two Fit Parents to Deny Visitation
The law sets forth a provision that if two "fit" parents (not including a stepparent) sign an affidavit opposing a grandparent visitation request, then the court shall dismiss a grandparent's request for visitation.

Attorney Fees
The law sets forth that the court may order reasonable attorney fees to a prevailing party in any grandparent visitation request. This would be for either the parent or the grandparent, depending on the discretion of the court hearing the case.

Alternative Standard of Proof
The law indicates that in the event a challenge to this law is ever made regarding the standard which the Michigan legislature sets forth (preponderance of the evidence) through any appellate court challenge, and the Michigan Supreme Court later determines that the burden of proof should be made greater than preponderance of the evidence (such as clear and convincing evidence) then the statute would automatically revert from preponderance of the evidence to clear and convincing evidence. This section was intentionally put into the law by the Michigan legislature in order to make sure that Michigan's law will never be ruled unconstitutional again, and that grandparents will always be able to maintain their right to see their grandchildren, even if the burden of proof is changed from preponderance of the evidence to clear and convincing evidence.

For more information regarding this law or grandparents rights to visitation in the State of Michigan, please contact Nichols & Eberth, P.C. at 313-561-5700 or email us at [email protected].



NICHOLS & EBERTH, P.C.
22374 Garrison, Dearborn, MI 48124
401 S. Woodward, Suite 430, Birmingham, MI 48009

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Call Dearborn office at (313) 561-5700 or
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stealth2

Under the Radar Member
Since you have seen the child only once, you're not going to meet the criteria of having a close and loving relationship that a court will want to see continue. Your son is allowed to decide that he does not want you in the child's life. You can talk to a local lawyer, but your chances of gaining visitation are pretty well nil.
 

rmet4nzkx

Senior Member
While the new MI law will be a boon to grandparents wishing visitation, the circumstances you stated, do not meet the standard required. Since you fail to state the reason for your divorce or how you moved on, your son may have some valid reason behind his wishes that you don't understand or agree with. Since the parents don't want you in their child's life, you might want to do some soul searching and repair your relationship with your son.
 

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