Lots of Questions

What is the name of your state?Massachusetts

I have a son that I had out of wedlock. His last name is my maiden name (I am now married). His father was ordered in 1996 to pay child support and has not done so since 1999. In our conversations he has said that he is willing to relinquish his rights for my husband to adopt him. How do I get this done without a lawyer?

Is it possible to change my son's last name without having my husband adopt him?

I would not recommend doing an adoption without a lawyer, too much fine print and in the end it is worth paying the money. I would check around for Mass. laws but I know that in Kansas you can change a childs name without the bio's consent (stipulations do apply here) and without an adoption. I changed my childs last name to that of my married name and childs stepfather's name without a lawyer and without bio's consent and without adoption. So that can easily be done (once again certain stipulations do apply) but as for the adoption, seriously recommend getting a lawyer. Hope this helps. Good luck.

California

I know in my state if you have consent you do not need a lawyer to adopt as a stepparent. It's really rather easy. You should get the book "How to adopt your stepchild". I bought it and it tells you how to do it step by step.