What is the name of your state? Wisconsin- Husband of 25 yrs wants a divorce. He is 47 and I am 52. (Has a 35 yr old girlfriend). I just found out a week ago and am devistated. He did this same thing 10 yrs ago but we stayed together because I got very sick and almost died because of the stress. I couldnt deal with it. But this time its different. I am dealing with it. (I hope ). We know we have to split 50/50. But he is not being fair about his 50. He makes over $12,000 more than I do. I cannot afford to buy another house nor even rent. We have no minor children. He has turned off the satellite, and now has purchased a new cell phone for himself. Can he do that? He refuses to leave the home because he says he cant afford a house and rent payment. He goes out for dinner almost every night while I stay home. He plans on getting a lawyer but I cannot afford one . Am I going to get nothing out of this ? What are my rights? What am I entitled to? Please help me!!
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questions galore
- Thread starter marik
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First, what's the big deal about a cel phone? I just went back under contract and got a VERY nice new cel phone this week and it cost me about $20 after rebates. A cel phone is NOT usually considered a major purchase.marik said:
Until there is a court order, neither you nor he must leave the home.
There are retirement plans you both have? Equity in the home? Savings accounts? Marital debt and assets will be split. You may be entitled to spousal support, as well.
You have your own income? Then WHY do you stay home everynight? I'm 50. Take a class, exercise by walking the mall, GET A LIFE. My mom was 47 when my dad died. She's 75 today and still goes out frequently to do things herself or with her friends. She certainly doesn't depend on a man being around in order to have something to do.marik said:
LdiJ
Senior Member
You really need to get an attorney. If he is going out to dinner every night its possible that he could be racking up some serious credit card debt that would just make your property settlement more complicated. The sooner you get an attorney the safer things are going to be economically.
If you cannot afford the house on your own then you will eventually get half of the equity in the house. You WILL be able to afford an apartment at that point....or perhaps even a small house of your own.
Please don't be foolish...find a way to get an attorney even if you have to get help from family.
If you cannot afford the house on your own then you will eventually get half of the equity in the house. You WILL be able to afford an apartment at that point....or perhaps even a small house of your own.
Please don't be foolish...find a way to get an attorney even if you have to get help from family.
wisconsin- I think your missing the point here Senior, I have not had a life outside the home in 25 yrs. My life has been here and I know nothing else. He has seen to that. I had to be home right after work. His rules! I have no friends to speak of. I have NO money because what I did make was paid on MY share of the bills. He makes alot more than I do. I never saw any of his money nor was I ever allowed to ask him what he does with it. As far as the cell phone? Well he turned off our satellite, then when out and bought the new cell phone for himself. When I asked him why he said because I wouldnt let him call his girlfriend from our home phone so he needed it. That hurt!!! He knows I cannot afford an attorney. He can and is getting one. So what is going to happen if I dont have an attorney? He says I will be served papers but I wont know what to do with them. My family has less money than I do. He has already cleaned out the savings. Have no clue where it went.I cant buy his half of the house because I cant afford the payments which would be over 500.00 a month. Rent in this area is at least that much or more plus utilities and he says I will NOT get any maintainence. So help me figure this out. Thank you
LdiJ
Senior Member
Having been married for 25 years its VERY likely that you WILL get maintenance. IF you have a good attorney to protect your rights. If he makes a lot more than you do its very likely that he will be ordered to pay your attorney fees. AT LEAST get a consult with an attorney. Many of them will give free or low cost initial consultations. You may find an attorney who is willing to work with you.marik said:
You also should STOP putting any money towards the bills (or at least only pay your personal ones). Let him worry about the bills.
Why you'd put up with that for 25 years, I have no idea.
And if he's not home, go DO something. You DO need to develop a life outside of your home. WE are the same age, there's plenty for women our age to do here in WI.
Are you in SE WI? I can PM you the name of a bulldog divorce Milwaukee attorney I know who is considered one of the best (and listed that way in Milwaukee Magazine). Or I have some smaller, low profile attorney offices as well. And check the attorneys listed in the FA referral site. But YOU have to start looking out for yourself, no one else but you can do that.
And if he's not home, go DO something. You DO need to develop a life outside of your home. WE are the same age, there's plenty for women our age to do here in WI.
Are you in SE WI? I can PM you the name of a bulldog divorce Milwaukee attorney I know who is considered one of the best (and listed that way in Milwaukee Magazine). Or I have some smaller, low profile attorney offices as well. And check the attorneys listed in the FA referral site. But YOU have to start looking out for yourself, no one else but you can do that.
im lost
nextwife, I really do appreciate the help your trying to give me but I just dont know how to take it. Im lost in this whole mess. I dont know if Im coming or going. I dont have any of the messenger services from the internet because Im not very good on computers. I had to get written instructions on how to use this site. I will give you an email address of a friends and you can email me the info if you would please. I live near Portage Wisc. Thank younextwife said:
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