Stepparent Adoption

What is the name of your state? NC

Hello, me and my husband have been married for 3 years and he would like to adopt my son who is 5 years old. The Bio dad has never had anything do to with my son he wouldnt even show up for the DNA tests. I have given him plenty of chances but he does not want to be in his life. How can we go about this? Can we file the papers ourselfs? The bio father is not on the birth certificate. Any advice?

Thanks
Chirstina

lilpebbles said:

What is the name of your state? NC

Hello, me and my husband have been married for 3 years and he would like to adopt my son who is 5 years old. The Bio dad has never had anything do to with my son he wouldnt even show up for the DNA tests. I have given him plenty of chances but he does not want to be in his life. How can we go about this? Can we file the papers ourselfs? The bio father is not on the birth certificate. Any advice?

Thanks
Chirstina

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You really should consult with an attorney. Since the bio-dad is not legally the father and has never been in the picture it may not be so difficult to do.

Please disregard the previous post.
You say the bio-dad failed to show for the DNA tests, were these court ordered tests? Was he made the legal father by default? He doesn't have to be on the BC if he was court ordered to do DNA and failed to do it and found to be the father by default.
How old is your child?
Is there a child support order and does he pay child support?
Answers to these questions will be needed to provide more specific advice as to whether or not you will require an attorney, but most likely you will.

The welfare dept. was the one trying to get the bio dad to take the test but he wouldnt. He has not been proven to be the father. Althought I do know he is. He has never payed child support and there is no order. My son is now 5 years old.

It is possible to do it yourself. However, you have a twist in there about establishing who the legal father is. If the alleged father can not be located, I'm not sure how they go about handling that. That is the part you really need to consult an attorney about.

Otherwise, all the other forms you will need, you can go to the courthouse to get or download and print them. You'll need adobe/acrobat reader to open them because they are pdf files.

You'll just have to pay the filing fees if you do it yourself. Also, you'll have to do a home study with DSS and that costs $200. However, I read in the statutes if the child has resided with the petioner for 2 yrs or more that it can be waived.

http://info.dhhs.state.nc.us/olm/forms/dss/

Please consult an attorney. Since the child has no legal father the steps you need to take may be very different than what is being outlined here. I am familiar with a large number of stepparent adoption cases where there was no legal father and where the process was relatively simple.

However the laws in each and every state are different when it comes to this issue, therefore you are going to get your best advice from a local attorney.

I would strongly recommend that you don't listen to any advice on this issue that doesn't come from a local attorney.

Um exuse me but I live in the same state as the poster, I've had close personal experience with stepparent adoptions and probably know more about them in NC than anyone else on this forum. I'm not saying I know EVERYTHING but probably more than anyone else on here. I've also worked closely with attorneys on one. The ONLY thing that will be different in this process is how to go about locating the father and establishing who the father is, otherwise the process is the exact same. Nothing changes that. I also told her she should speak with an attorney. And some of the advice that I give on here, I have been given in the past by NC attorneys.