Alimony for a 4 year marriage in New York.

I have been married for 4 years - no assets to talk of (we rent apt, have no car or kids), a bit of debt. I earn $110,000 she earns $45K I've offered to pay of the remaining 'joint' debt (approx $10K) but she's claiming she wants $1200 a month for 3 years. I wanted to agree an amount before lawyers get involved - but it's quite obvious that's not going to happen. Will her lawyer try and get that much from me or will he advise her not to bother and take what I offer.

Generally, alimony is only awarded in a marriage that lasted 10+ years. Try googling NY alimony -- there are other factors to consider, like disability that occurred during the marriage. I wouldn't agree to pay her a cent in alimony.

No one could possibly divine what her lawyer will advise her to do.

Each party can make a claim. The judge will decide. Alimony is different then dividing the assets or liabilities fairly. Your being gracious in paying off all debts. Sounds like your being quite civil in this matter. Consult with a Lawyer if and when the alimony issue is addressed. So often folks want to settle out of court and without the legal documentation to back them up in later years. Protect your rights.

UK_NewYork said:

I have been married for 4 years - no assets to talk of (we rent apt, have no car or kids), a bit of debt. I earn $110,000 she earns $45K I've offered to pay of the remaining 'joint' debt (approx $10K) but she's claiming she wants $1200 a month for 3 years. I wanted to agree an amount before lawyers get involved - but it's quite obvious that's not going to happen. Will her lawyer try and get that much from me or will he advise her not to bother and take what I offer.

Click to expand...

Tell her to stick it where the sun don't shine then file for divorce and alimony from HER.

UK_NewYork said:

I have been married for 4 years - no assets to talk of (we rent apt, have no car or kids), a bit of debt. I earn $110,000 she earns $45K I've offered to pay of the remaining 'joint' debt (approx $10K) but she's claiming she wants $1200 a month for 3 years. I wanted to agree an amount before lawyers get involved - but it's quite obvious that's not going to happen. Will her lawyer try and get that much from me or will he advise her not to bother and take what I offer.

Click to expand...

I have one bit of info to give you to keep in mind in your negotiations. Alimony is an above the line tax deduction to you, and taxable income to her.
If your marginal tax rate is 28%, then 1200.00 worth of alimony only costs you 864.00....taking into account federal taxes, and would cost you even less taking into account state and local taxes.

Please don't construe that as an opinion as to whether or not you should pay alimony....I just thought that the information would be useful.

LdiJ said:

If your marginal tax rate is 28%, then 1200.00 worth of alimony only costs you 864.00....

Click to expand...

So his STBX wants him to pay her alimony that will effectively. cost him over $800.00 month for only a FOUR year marriage! And that's after assuming financial responibility for JOINT debts.

UK_NewYork said:

I have been married for 4 years - no assets to talk of (we rent apt, have no car or kids), a bit of debt. I earn $110,000 she earns $45K I've offered to pay of the remaining 'joint' debt (approx $10K) but she's claiming she wants $1200 a month for 3 years. I wanted to agree an amount before lawyers get involved - but it's quite obvious that's not going to happen. Will her lawyer try and get that much from me or will he advise her not to bother and take what I offer.

Click to expand...

I only have one thing to offer: if you do agree to the three year alimony (which I wouldn't) make sure it ends after three years OR if she remarries or cohabitates with an unrelated member of the opposite sex or dies. Recently, someone here did not have that in his court order and is still paying his newly married wife until July of 2006.

LdiJ said:

I have one bit of info to give you to keep in mind in your negotiations. Alimony is an above the line tax deduction to you, and taxable income to her.
If your marginal tax rate is 28%, then 1200.00 worth of alimony only costs you 864.00....taking into account federal taxes, and would cost you even less taking into account state and local taxes.

Please don't construe that as an opinion as to whether or not you should pay alimony....I just thought that the information would be useful.

Click to expand...

Really? And what of the price of her self respect that she wants alimony after a 4 year marriage? Why would you ever encourage women not to stand on their own two feet and encourage men to somehow see the bright side of paying another adults way through life?

nextwife said:

So his STBX wants him to pay her alimony that will effectively. cost him over $800.00 month for only a FOUR year marriage! And that's after assuming financial responibility for JOINT debts.

Click to expand...

Like I said, I wasn't expressing any opinion on the validity...just giving him some info that I thought he should have.

VeronicaGia said:

I only have one thing to offer: if you do agree to the three year alimony (which I wouldn't) make sure it ends after three years OR if she remarries or cohabitates with an unrelated member of the opposite sex or dies. Recently, someone here did not have that in his court order and is still paying his newly married wife until July of 2006.

Click to expand...

Yes, that would be me she is referring to. But there are lots and lots and lots of differences between your situation and mine. My ex took me back to court recently to try and end his spousal support obligation. He lost. He has to continue to pay the remainder of his obligation. I have been remarried almost 4 years when he took me to court. My marriage to my ex lasted almost 12 years. And my ex took early withdrawals from his IRA to fund his philandering ways during the last 1 1/2 years of our marriage. There were reasons for his spousal support obligation. But no, he did not stipulate remarriage as termination factor in divorce decree. All things considered, I would not have signed the divorce decree if he had. So if none of the above reasons for spousal support apply to you, and your wife is capable of supporting herself I see no reason for spousal support being paid.

VeronicaGia said:

Really? And what of the price of her self respect that she wants alimony after a 4 year marriage? Why would you ever encourage women not to stand on their own two feet and encourage men to somehow see the bright side of paying another adults way through life?

Click to expand...

I agree, after 4 years hardly seems worth it, and SHE does not get to "dictate" how much she wants........ the judge will ultimately decide how much, IF ANYTHING you give her.

I doubt in such a short marriage she'll get a penny - I was married 5 years and not only did I not ask for it, my lawyer chimed in with that I would not be eligible, and I said I don't care if I am or not, I don't want his money..... just the marriage to be over was enough for me.

Thanks everyone for you're advice and comments - it's put my mind at rest. This isn't a pleasant time, especially as she's not exactly the most easy going person in the world.

I do have one more question if anyone can help - apparently her lawyer has told her that if I 'tamper' with the joint bank account (ie: put my wages into a separate account) or try to freeze it I could be held in contempt of court? Doesn't sound right - is this true?

Thanks.

Not true.
Ignore her remark. Have you tried to get proper advisal of your own? Most lawyers would caution you in even speaking to the ex until settlement has transpired.

You don't have a separate account yet? You better get moving to protect yourself. Half of whatever is in that account belongs to you. Take your half and get your name off the account. Get your name off any credit cards or anything else she can run up debts on. Don't be naive here. it could cost you tens of thousands of dollars and ruin your credit. She has no claim to any more than half the assets you both built during your marriage (unless you comingled prior funds and assets and made them half hers too).