Will be 7 in September.
If you pull a 7 year old in to court to make him choose between his parents, a judge will STOMP on you or your attorney. What kind of parent puts their child in that situation? Not a very good one so look for a judge to be entirely ticked off. If you want someone to protect your son's interests, get a GAL appointed.
If they wind up living together, or even get married, then yes wouldn't the child's life be in danger?
No. YOu said this man had PAST problems. Prove he is doing drugs now. Prove he is drinking now. Prove that those habits harm your child directly. Prove that he is an imminent danger to your child. Being around him is not putting your child in danger. You can't draw that line. YOu are angry at your wife for hooking up with this man but you can't use your child to exact revenge.
Also, the child knows the man, wouldn't that phycologicvally mess the child up?
No. Knowing this man won't psychologically mess the child up. Being torn between mom and dad could. Being made to feel guilty for wanting to love mommy could because daddy is mad at her. Being placed in that situation could screw the kid up. Knowing a man other than you is not going to mess the child up. If mom is introducing said man as the kid's new daddy -- that is a problem. With mom, not the man. If they are having sex in front of junior -- that is a problem. But the sheer knowing this man -- not going to psychologically mess up junior.
Also, doesn't the court look at the parent commiting the audultery, what kind of role model would that parent be?
Nope. That is not the important thing. The court looks at the best interest of the child. Who is more likely to promote a relationship with both parents. Who is the primary caregiver of the child handling the child's day to day needs. Who is the person most likely to continue facilitating strong bonds and nurturing the child. Not adultery. Again if mom is having sex with anyone in front of junior that is taken into consideration. But mom walking out on you -- no. Morals do not dictate the courts. the law dictates the court.
We also own a house, and my son and I want to live in the house, do I have to sell it?