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Being accused of Sexual Harrasment

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weplus3

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? North Carolina

I am 40% business owner of a company and had an affair with one of my employees (a manager). She is the one who prusued me and made advances toward me for 2 years before I finally caved in. What a mistake that was! I am married and so is she. We had an on-going relationship for about a year. She wanted me to leave my family and I said no and ended the relationship. After that she ressigned from the company on 2 different occasions and came back and said that she didn't want to leave so we accepted her back because she was a good employee. After she came back her job performance started going down and we were getting alot of complanints from other employees about her. After several months of complaints my other 2 partners decided that we fire her as she is bringing morale down and we have already lost one employee due to her. Unfortunanlty, I am the one who was ask to let her go (noone knew about the affair). After I fired her she told me that she would "ruin" me and that she was going to get me for Sexual Harrasment if I didn't pay her $70,000. Of course, I told her that I wasn't going to pay her anything because harrasement didn't occur. If anything, she harrased me in the beginning. She has now called one of my employees asking him if he would sign an affidaved saying that all sexual harrasment cases were to be reported directly to me, therefore, I was harrassing her and got away with it. My employee said no, as this isn't true. There was NO harrasment. It was a consinsul relationship and she is trying to take the business down and make some extra money because I would not leave my family for her and on top of that she was fried due to work related issues. Does she have a case? This is a true to life "FATAL ATTRACTION". Please help me.
 


S

seniorjudge

Senior Member
weplus3 said:
What is the name of your state? North Carolina

I am 40% business owner of a company and had an affair with one of my employees (a manager). She is the one who prusued me and made advances toward me for 2 years before I finally caved in. What a mistake that was! I am married and so is she. We had an on-going relationship for about a year. She wanted me to leave my family and I said no and ended the relationship. After that she ressigned from the company on 2 different occasions and came back and said that she didn't want to leave so we accepted her back because she was a good employee. After she came back her job performance started going down and we were getting alot of complanints from other employees about her. After several months of complaints my other 2 partners decided that we fire her as she is bringing morale down and we have already lost one employee due to her. Unfortunanlty, I am the one who was ask to let her go (noone knew about the affair). After I fired her she told me that she would "ruin" me and that she was going to get me for Sexual Harrasment if I didn't pay her $70,000. Of course, I told her that I wasn't going to pay her anything because harrasement didn't occur. If anything, she harrased me in the beginning. She has now called one of my employees asking him if he would sign an affidaved saying that all sexual harrasment cases were to be reported directly to me, therefore, I was harrassing her and got away with it. My employee said no, as this isn't true. There was NO harrasment. It was a consinsul relationship and she is trying to take the business down and make some extra money because I would not leave my family for her and on top of that she was fried due to work related issues. Does she have a case? This is a true to life "FATAL ATTRACTION". Please help me.
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So, just to get this straight, all she has done is a lot of talking. Is that right? No knives, no play Misty for me, nothing like that?
 
W

weplus3

Junior Member
No knives. Just one of the biggest mistakes that I have ever made. #1 - commiting adultery and #2 hurting the people that I care most about. This person is a vengful person. She has told her husband that the affair didn't happen and that I was just sexually harrassing her. She is covering her butt now with her husband. I have since come out to my family and am working to mend my relationship with them.
 
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mitousmom

Member
She can always allege sexual harassment and can file a complaint with EEOC or a governmental human rights agency. Whether she prevails depends upon the evidence obtained and whether it shows that she was terminated because she rejected your sexual advances.
 
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BelizeBreeze

Senior Member
Have your company legal rep write her a cease and desist letter and have your employee provide the attorney an affidavit of what occurred.

then file for a no-contact order against her. and the next time she contacts anyone at the company call the police.
 
W

weplus3

Junior Member
mitousmom said:
She can always allege sexual harassment and can file a complaint with EEOC or a governmental human rights agency. Whether she prevails depends upon the evidence obtained and whether it shows that she was terminated because she rejected your sexual advances.
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It was a mutal relationship and for the record, she made advances toward me. That is how this got started. She was fired because of her poor performance of her work and how she treated other employees. We have had a couple of employees quite because of the way she treated them and a handful of others who have complained about her during the last year. The relationship was over months before she was fired. She point blank told me that if I didn't pay her 70K then she would make up stuff and ruin me. She isn't a good person.
 
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BelizeBreeze

Senior Member
and what is stopping you from calling her and asking why she is asking for the $70,000 and recording the conversation? THEN handing it over to your attorney?>
 
W

weplus3

Junior Member
BelizeBreeze said:
Have your company legal rep write her a cease and desist letter and have your employee provide the attorney an affidavit of what occurred.

then file for a no-contact order against her. and the next time she contacts anyone at the company call the police.
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Thank you for your advice. What is a cease and desist letter? We haven't contacted our attornery as we are not 100% sure that she has contacted an attorney. This all happened about 3 months ago and just the other day is when she called one of my employees asking them to sign an affidavied saying that I was the one that people went to complain about sexual harrasement. That is why she couln't complain to anyone. The employee said NO that this isn't true so he isn't going to sign anything. I will mention what you said about the no-contact order to my partners.
 
W

weplus3

Junior Member
BelizeBreeze said:
and what is stopping you from calling her and asking why she is asking for the $70,000 and recording the conversation? THEN handing it over to your attorney?>
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That is my next step. However, I have been told that a taped conversation is not allowed in court.
 
B

BelizeBreeze

Senior Member
weplus3 said:
That is my next step. However, I have been told that a taped conversation is not allowed in court.
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I didn't say court, and what you have beed "told" is not the reality. it depends ENTIRELY on the contents of the taped conversation, the means of securing it and it's relevance to the proceedings.

I SAID, turn it over to your attorney so HE/SHE can decide whether or not to turn it over to the police for blackmail proceedings.
 
W

weplus3

Junior Member
BelizeBreeze said:
I didn't say court, and what you have beed "told" is not the reality. it depends ENTIRELY on the contents of the taped conversation, the means of securing it and it's relevance to the proceedings.

I SAID, turn it over to your attorney so HE/SHE can decide whether or not to turn it over to the police for blackmail proceedings.
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Thank you. This is what I will do. If she does go through with this, do I have any recourse to counter sue for defamation of charater as this will hit the headlines of this gets to court and ruin my business and she knows that. I hope everyone that reads this learns from my mistake!
 
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Beth3

Senior Member
You're getting way ahead of yourself. What you need to do NOW is consult with an employment law attorney. He/she can make sure you and your company are taking all the necessary steps at present to ensure that he/she can mount a good defense if she files an EEOC complaint. Could be all this will come to nothing she she'll just drift off into the mists but you want to be prepared in case she's as vengeful as you believe she is.

You should speak to an employment law attorney immediately.
 
xylene

xylene

Senior Member
Some fries with that...

And enjoy the special sauce of knowing that, since you rehired her after the affair, this is all your fault for the lack of good judgment.

A kid with a lemonade stand knows you don't hire an ex.

Follow Beth3's sensible advice.
 
M

mitousmom

Member
Have you informed your co-owners of your relationship with this employee and her threats? You may want to do so, and do so certainly before you contact an attorney on behalf of the company. I would also recommend that you allow one of the co-owners to handle this matter on behalf of the company, instead of continuing to respond to or interact with this ex-employee.

How many employees does your company have?
 
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W

weplus3

Junior Member
mitousmom said:
Have you informed your co-owners of your relationship with this employee and her threats? You may want to do so, and do so certainly before you contact an attorney on behalf of the company. I would also recommend that you allow one of the co-owners to handle this matter on behalf of the company, instead of continuing to respond to or interact with this ex-employee.

How many employees does your company have?
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We have about 30 employees. My business partners along with a couple of employees know and I am sure that others know but haven't said anything. My business partner is handling the matter as I haven't talked to her since she was fired. By the way, the relationship was over months before she was fired. She has called me a couple of times and left messages but I haven't and will not return her calls. As far as being charged with this, I am confident that I will not be because there was NO sexual Harrasement so she has no evidence. What is bothering me the most is that she is lashing out to hurt me by hurting my business and family. I have to believe in that saying "The truth shall set you free".
 
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