Memah,
I do STRONGLY feel that you were treated badly (railroaded!). The Judge was an idiot. He treated the proceeding as tho it was a FL hearing ... it was a criminal hearing & it was vital that your constitutional rights be accorded all due respect & protected to the nth degree.
This Idaho case is worth reading regarding the 'willfull' standard (re your act).
http://www.isc.idaho.gov/rules/ircp75.rul
If nothing else, if I were you, I would do a quick Motion For Reconsideration, stressing that you filled out a written request for a PD, spoke with the PD and believed he would be in court and you waived your right to that PD because you felt pressured by the Judge's conversation with Plaintiff's atty (your waiver must be knowing and voluntary - how voluntary is it, when the Judge is speaking to atty as tho you caused a problem ... your call)
I would make a paragraph regarding your not being aware that you did not have to testify against yourself, and you did not realize that you could exercise your 5th amendment right not to testify/incriminate yourself.
Another issue is the question of your act(s) which prompted the contempt charge. If a Judge previously ruled in a manner which you believed gave you permission to do the act, the standard of accusing you of contempt may be deficient. Please read the case cited above - only you know if your act fits the standard.
Memah, you don't have to file a slick, well-formatted motion. In fact, the more 'disengenious' it is, the more effective for a pro per stating 'I didn't know my rights, I was worried about delaying the court waiting for an atty; I thought I had to testify, etc
Read the Rule; see what the court was required to advise you of; if the Judge really didn't do what the law requires, then list it. You don't have to write a book, just state the fact.
And, after you read through everything and consider all, make your own decision (not what someone like me says - do what's right for you).
I'm sorry for how you were treated. I feel badly that the system let you down.
Whenever anyone's constitutional rights are not accorded the utmost respect, we all lose.
