help in South caroina

my wife and I had a verbal agreement

What is the name of your state? South Carolina
my wife and I had a verbal agreement that I would pay the insurance on the car she drives for 3 year and with that she was going to take her name off the house we own. well now she has changed her mind, and she wants $4000 before she will sign her name off. Now I know it could be worse, but I have for the past year and 1/2 held to that agreement and paid the car insurance. I don't know if I have a leg to stand on here if it goes to court, with the verbal agreement that is? also she has a child from before we met, for the past 7 years I have helped raise him, he sees me as his dad and I see him as my son. I pay child support each week for him, if I am paying with a check will a check stub work as record in S.C? Oh and I found her with another man that is the reason we are done! Does S.C law look down on that or is the same 1/2 of ours is 1/2 of hers.What is the name of your state?

onebat4u said:

What is the name of your state? South Carolina
my wife and I had a verbal agreement that I would pay the insurance on the car she drives for 3 year and with that she was going to take her name off the house we own. well now she has changed her mind, and she wants $4000 before she will sign her name off. Now I know it could be worse, but I have for the past year and 1/2 held to that agreement and paid the car insurance. I don't know if I have a leg to stand on here if it goes to court, with the verbal agreement that is? also she has a child from before we met, for the past 7 years I have helped raise him, he sees me as his dad and I see him as my son. I pay child support each week for him, if I am paying with a check will a check stub work as record in S.C? Oh and I found her with another man that is the reason we are done! Does S.C law look down on that or is the same 1/2 of ours is 1/2 of hers.What is the name of your state?

Click to expand...

I sincerely doubt that 3 years of car insurance is equal to her share of the equity in the home.

Why are you paying child support for a child that is not yours? Did you adopt the child?

If your property settlements goes to court, everything that accrued during the marriage is going to pretty much get divided in half, assets and debts.

That includes, but is not limited to home equity, bank accounts, and other types of accounts, retirement funds, cars and all debts.

If you end up with the home, not only does she have to sign off....but you also have to refinance to remove her from the mortgage.

regardless of the insurance being less than the house she walked out of this marriage and said she wanted nothing at all! I have been nice about the way she screwed me and our family over because she could not keep her pants on. she has debt that was caused by her ex before me (the bio father) and she wants me to pay it off for her, along with (I think) some doc bills that are for her and her son and I don't have a problem with that part I am willing to pay 1/2 of that. Her sons bio father has done nothing for him at all, and she has not tried to make him do anything at all. but I have always been the "nice guy" and I feel like I am getting the short end of the stick here. I have not adopted the child, I have raised him for the past 7 years and there are to many dead bet parents in this world and my mother and father did not raise one.
So i take it that in S.C. it does not matter what the reason for divorce is she can still get 1/2?

onebat4u said:

regardless of the insurance being less than the house she walked out of this marriage and said she wanted nothing at all! I have been nice about the way she screwed me and our family over because she could not keep her pants on. she has debt that was caused by her ex before me (the bio father) and she wants me to pay it off for her, along with (I think) some doc bills that are for her and her son and I don't have a problem with that part I am willing to pay 1/2 of that. Her sons bio father has done nothing for him at all, and she has not tried to make him do anything at all. but I have always been the "nice guy" and I feel like I am getting the short end of the stick here. I have not adopted the child, I have raised him for the past 7 years and there are to many dead bet parents in this world and my mother and father did not raise one.
So i take it that in S.C. it does not matter what the reason for divorce is she can still get 1/2?

Click to expand...

The reason for the divorce pretty much doesn't matter in ANY state. Its not 100% guaranteed that she would receive a full half, but that is pretty much the norm. However, there are many different ways to divide things in order to come to a 50/50 share of marital assets and debts.

In some cases, if the total debts and total assets are relatively equal, one party might keep all of the assets and all of the debts....because in the end, that is still 50/50.

I some cases the marital home is sold and the equity used to pay the marital debts, and any remainder is divided, along with any other assets.

In some cases someone might give up their share of the marital home in order to keep their full retirement fund.

In other words, what matters in the end, is that each person has been debited or credited for both their share of the marital assets and their share of the marital debts...however you end up chopping things up.

So...draw up a joint net worth statement so that you have a full picture of the marital debts and assets....and then figure it out from there.

However, no, your verbal agreement isn't going to hold up...sorry.

LdiJ said:

In some cases, if the total debts and total assets are relatively equal, one party might keep all of the assets and all of the debts....because in the end, that is still 50/50.

Click to expand...

onebat4u said:

she has debt that was caused by her ex before me (the bio father) and she wants me to pay it off for her, along with (I think) some doc bills that are for her and her son and I don't have a problem with that part I am willing to pay 1/2 of that. Her sons bio father has done nothing for him at all, and she has not tried to make him do anything at all. but I have always been the "nice guy" and I feel like I am getting the short end of the stick here. I have not adopted the child, I have raised him for the past 7 years and there are to many dead bet parents in this world and my mother and father did not raise one.
So i take it that in S.C. it does not matter what the reason for divorce is she can still get 1/2?

Click to expand...

But much of this debt is NOT marital debt, so it is NOT automatically 50/50. It's medical costs for HER son with another guy, and other premarital debt.

That would be treated, in court, as SOLELY her (well, her and her ex) responsibility. POster would NOT be ordered to pay her premarital debt or HER kids medical bills.

onebat4u said:

What is the name of your state? South Carolina
my wife and I had a verbal agreement that I would pay the insurance on the car she drives for 3 year and with that she was going to take her name off the house we own. well now she has changed her mind, and she wants $4000 before she will sign her name off. Now I know it could be worse, but I have for the past year and 1/2 held to that agreement and paid the car insurance. I don't know if I have a leg to stand on here if it goes to court, with the verbal agreement that is?

I don't believe you have a leg to stand on because no recorded matrimonial action has taken place.

also she has a child from before we met, for the past 7 years I have helped raise him, he sees me as his dad and I see him as my son. I pay child support each week for him, if I am paying with a check will a check stub work as record in S.C?

As a record of what? You being an idiot to pay "child support" for a kid that someone else should be paying the support?

Don't expect that "gift" to influence the court.

Oh and I found her with another man that is the reason we are done! Does S.C law look down on that or is the same 1/2 of ours is 1/2 of hers.What is the name of your state?

Click to expand...

What's hers is hers and what's yours is "ours".

As a record of what? You being an idiot to pay "child support" for a kid that someone else should be paying the support?

Don't expect that "gift" to influence the court.

Bali Hai, YOU are the reason I don't like posting on this forum, I have in the past and I have read other post, and people like you who want to call other people names for what they do or ask. I didn't for any reason come here for your dumb a$$ comments about me caring for a child who’s crappie father walked out on him when he was 3 years old and I am the Father/ daddy that he has now who DOES Care about him as if he is my own! And you are 100% right the $ is a gift, from my heart and by the sounds of it that is some thing YOU do not have. I see him EVERY day, How about you post a reply after this one and I will make sure he reads it and tell him he is not my son and if he agrees with you, I will stop giving my "gift" and quiet seeing him as my son! I am here for Help just like everybody else and NOT here for smart a## answers so please keep them to your self.

onebat4u said:

regardless of the insurance being less than the house she walked out of this marriage and said she wanted nothing at all! I have been nice about the way she screwed me and our family over because she could not keep her pants on.

Saying that is one thing, proving it in court is much more difficult.

she has debt that was caused by her ex before me (the bio father) and she wants me to pay it off for her, along with (I think) some doc bills that are for her and her son and I don't have a problem with that part I am willing to pay 1/2 of that. Her sons bio father has done nothing for him at all, and she has not tried to make him do anything at all. but I have always been the "nice guy" and I feel like I am getting the short end of the stick here. I have not adopted the child, I have raised him for the past 7 years and there are to many dead bet parents in this world and my mother and father did not raise one.
So i take it that in S.C. it does not matter what the reason for divorce is she can still get 1/2?

Click to expand...

Yes of course. And she may get more than half. That is called "equitable distribution". If the divorce is contested the court will decide what is equitable.

Has she worked during the marriage? What is the disparity in your incomes? How much alimony are you willing to pay her?

nextwife said:

But much of this debt is NOT marital debt, so it is NOT automatically 50/50. It's medical costs for HER son with another guy, and other premarital debt.

That would be treated, in court, as SOLELY her (well, her and her ex) responsibility. POster would NOT be ordered to pay her premarital debt or HER kids medical bills.

Click to expand...

Oh...I agree...her premarital debt and her son's medical expenses are her problem...not his....assuming that they didn't refi the house and pay off some of it or something of that nature.

when we split up I did refi the house, H/O insurance dubbed so I needed to lower the house payment and she got 1/2 of what money we got back from it. and she didn't pay off any of the debt she is asking money for now.

onebat4u said:

when we split up I did refi the house, H/O insurance dubbed so I needed to lower the house payment and she got 1/2 of what money we got back from it. and she didn't pay off any of the debt she is asking money for now.

Click to expand...

Let me make sure that I understand....after you split up you refied the house and she got half of the equity at the time....correct?

If so...then you are home free as far as the house is concerned....however, if she didn't get 1/2 of the equity, but only 1/2 of whatever the two of you chose to take from the equity in excess of whatever bills you were attempting to cover...then its not the same.

However, she is still responsible for half of the non-paid off marital debt....and still entitled to 1/2 of any marital assets other than the house.

no I just refi to lower my house payment, and only got about $1600 back, and she got 1/2 of that. when you say "non-paid off marital debt" we had credit cards but only in my name and 2 cars both in my name she didn't pay anything other that the car she drove I paid for all the rest, she held and still does a full time job that pays well but still less than me (maybe 1/2 of what I bring home) and when we were together we used her money to buy food and paid for daycare and she made the payment (and still does) on the car she drives, I fill that even if the car is in my name she has made all the payments so it's her car. we really are not "in debt" together. So I am lost.

onebat4u said:

no I just refi to lower my house payment, and only got about $1600 back, and she got 1/2 of that. when you say "non-paid off marital debt" we had credit cards but only in my name and 2 cars both in my name she didn't pay anything other that the car she drove I paid for all the rest, she held and still does a full time job that pays well but still less than me (maybe 1/2 of what I bring home) and when we were together we used her money to buy food and paid for daycare and she made the payment (and still does) on the car she drives, I fill that even if the car is in my name she has made all the payments so it's her car. we really are not "in debt" together.

Yes you are really "in debt" together.

So I am lost.

Click to expand...

Yes that is obvious. Get a lawyer and don't make the same mistake again.

onebat4u said:

no I just refi to lower my house payment, and only got about $1600 back, and she got 1/2 of that. when you say "non-paid off marital debt" we had credit cards but only in my name and 2 cars both in my name she didn't pay anything other that the car she drove I paid for all the rest, she held and still does a full time job that pays well but still less than me (maybe 1/2 of what I bring home) and when we were together we used her money to buy food and paid for daycare and she made the payment (and still does) on the car she drives, I fill that even if the car is in my name she has made all the payments so it's her car. we really are not "in debt" together. So I am lost.

Click to expand...

Assets acquired together during the marriage are MARITAL. You would have a marital interest in the car, she in the house.

The debt she left in place and did not pay off from before the marriage is NOT a marital debt. You would likely be successful in having that debt totally removed from any settlemnt discussins. Same with HER child's med expenses. These are NOT marital. Assets and debts acquired together during the marriage are marital.