Domestic Violence

California

We have an employee who we "suspect" is involved in a Domestic Violence situation at home. She comes to work with bruises on her forhead and throat. She has called in sick and comes into work and leaves because she is feeling "ill". She has told co-workers that she is wanting to leave her homelife, but doesn't say why...

As an employer, do we have the right to ask her about it and refer her to the agencies that we would normally? Usually employees come to me, but this one hasn't come to me, and we don't want to wait until its too late.

Well, yes, you have the "right" to tell an employee just about anything but I suggest you tread very carefully here. She could be in a very dangerous situation and you don't want to do anything to make things worse for her.

I've served on the Board of a DV agency for many years, as well as have dealt with this as an HR practitioner. What I suggest you do is find a way to meet with this employee very privately, express your concern about her well-being, and tell her if there are problems at home, you'd be more than happy to provide her with any referral information to agencies that might assist her. (Stop shy of "diagnosing" her situation. Victims of DV are usually ashamed of the situation they're in, even if it's no fault of their own plus you don't know what is actually going on with her.)

After you have that discussion, the ball is in her court to ask for the information and follow-up. Even having the name and phone number of a DV agency on her person, if her SO finds it, could result in escallated violence. You can also offer to make a private office and phone available to her at work to make any calls to your EAP or a DV agency.

Lastly, if she does decide to seek help or counseling, you might also offer to flex her hours so that she can do so without her significant other being aware. She very likely has to explain her whereabouts to the minute to her SO so she has no opportunity to get counseling without his being aware of it. I did the latter for an employee on one occasion and it worked very well.

When a victim of DV decides to leave her spouse/partner, that is by far the most dangerous time for her. She needs a DV agency to assist her in creating a safe exit strategy. Don't try to help her with that yourself.

Lastly, if you would like some expert advice on how to assist this employee and help keep her safe, you may want to call your local DV agency yourself and speak with them.