Cohabitation with a 17 year old

What is the name of your state? North Carolina.

For the record, this is not a question on statutory rape, dating a minor, or any other sexually related offense.

As of two weeks from now I will be 20 years of age.
as of one and a half weeks from now my potential house-mate will be 17.

I know that this line is in every post, but we do not plan on having sex...I say this with near certainty as we are not in love, dating, friends with benefits, or otherwise romantically involved. However, stuff happens and even if we were to become sexually active, NC's Age of Consent is 16.

The situation is as follows.

We are co-workers. She has obtained a G.E.D., therefore our cohabitation can not be seen as detrimental to her education.

She currently is working part-time, and living with her parents.
Her Parents do not want her to grow up, so they permit her to leave the house unaccompanied to go to work, period. If it takes longer than 15 minutes after closing time to clear the store of customers so we can close, they call the store demanding to speak to her.

I am also working part time as well as carrying 9 credit hours in college, and have been living at home while in school. Recently my mother, brother, and I have been butting heads due to having 3 dominant personalities in an enclosed space.

While both of us feel we need to alter our living arrangements, but neither of us have the resources to go it alone.
We came up with a perfect solution... or perhaps not...

So this is the question. Are there any laws in the state of North Carolina that would prohibit the cohabitation of a male, age 20, and a female, age 17, while maintaining a non-sexual/non-romantic relationship.What is the name of your state? North Carolina.

I will clarify any points that I need to... this is a true scenario, and I have been completely honest and will answer any (non-identifying) questions with complete honesty. After all, how could the advice be of any value if I withheld info that voids it?

Thanks for any help you can offer,
Mega

P.S. since 'google it' seems to be a standard answer, I have, and I ended up here, so perhaps we can skip that nugget of wisdom and move to more relevant solutions.

The girl is a minor and until she is 18 she is under the care and control of her parents. If she were to leave her home without her parents permission and move in with you, that would be viewed as running away and you would be up on several charges. Among them parental interference, harboring a runaway and contributing to the delinquency of a minor.

baystategirl said:

The girl is a minor and until she is 18 she is under the care and control of her parents. If she were to leave her home without her parents permission and move in with you, that would be viewed as running away and you would be up on several charges. Among them parental interference, harboring a runaway and contributing to the delinquency of a minor.

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Thanks for the input, do you know of any NC statutes, or Federal law that i can check on this?
I can see harboring a runaway, and parental interference as remote possibilities, but considering that under their care she has already dropped out of school in favor of a G.E.D., experimented in drugs on a few occasions, and alcohol often, and we would be living in a Drug Free apartment complex with a one strike you're out policy. I can't see how contributing to delinquency applies.

megamaster87 said:

Thanks for the input, do you know of any NC statutes, or Federal law that i can check on this?
I can see harboring a runaway, and parental interference as remote possibilities, but considering that under their care she has already dropped out of school in favor of a G.E.D., experimented in drugs on a few occasions, and alcohol often, and we would be living in a Drug Free apartment complex with a one strike you're out policy. I can't see how contributing to delinquency applies.

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You can use google to pull up the relevant Statutes for North Carolina. CTD is helping a runaway minor. When you help (aide) a minor in the committal of a crime (running away) that is contributing. See how it applies now?

megamaster87 said:

Thanks for the input, do you know of any NC statutes, or Federal law that i can check on this?
I can see harboring a runaway, and parental interference as remote possibilities, but considering that under their care she has already dropped out of school in favor of a G.E.D., experimented in drugs on a few occasions, and alcohol often, and we would be living in a Drug Free apartment complex with a one strike you're out policy. I can't see how contributing to delinquency applies.

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Tell you what - why don't you contact CPS if things are so bad. Or, you could seek custody of the child. (That's sarcastic - you would never get it)

My new confusion is this... i know several people who at 17, left home to live on their own. So basically it is fine for her to start her own life, but anyone 18 or over who helps her start her own life may face jailtime... got it.

megamaster87 said:

My new confusion is this... i know several people who at 17, left home to live on their own. So basically it is fine for her to start her own life, but anyone 18 or over who helps her start her own life may face jailtime... got it.

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Those several may have had permission from their parents. This girl has shown that she is irresponsible and the parents are taking measures that she stay out of trouble. Per your post I would believe they WILL file a complaint with the police. To assume that you, at the tender age of 20, know more about raising a child than her parents is pure arrogance. The girl quit school, so parents said "Get a job"....girl did/does drugs so parents said " As long as you live under our roof you will not have any "freedom" as you have proven that you can't be trusted"....

These parents are trying to maintain control over a girl that is headed for trouble. You are too young to understand this...but the parents are desperately trying to keep her safe until she gains the maturity to make decent life choices.

1 her parents are the ones who encouraged her toward the G.E.D.
2 her father provided her with the alcohol

And before you recommend it, social services has visited twice based on 'anonymous tips'. I only called in one, so apparently i am not the only one who saw a problem.
Our local office is undermanned, and unless they see obvious bruising, it usually gets overlooked.

Does anyone have constructive recommendations?

Another thing that was suggested to her was emancipation, what could anyone productively tell me about this option and how it would or would not apply?


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I did not come here to get into a pissing contest with anyone.
I came here because she wanted to know her options, and they monitor her internet use, emails, etc. the primary option we saw was the option I posted about originally. I will except any constructive advice you could give me... this girl needs a way out, and while she may not be the most mature person I know, she has been able to help me and several of her other friends through an emotional hell. I feel I owe it to her to find any way I can to help her with this.

megamaster87 said:

1 her parents are the ones who encouraged her toward the G.E.D.
2 her father provided her with the alcohol

And before you recommend it, social services has visited twice based on 'anonymous tips'. I only called in one, so apparently i am not the only one who saw a problem.
Our local office is undermanned, and unless they see obvious bruising, it usually gets overlooked.

Does anyone have constructive recommendations?

Another thing that was suggested to her was emancipation, what could anyone productively tell me about this option and how it would or would not apply?


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I did not come here to get into a pissing contest with anyone.
I came here because she wanted to know her options, and they monitor her internet use, emails, etc. the primary option we saw was the option I posted about originally. I will except any constructive advice you could give me... this girl needs a way out, and while she may not be the most mature person I know, she has been able to help me and several of her other friends through an emotional hell. I feel I owe it to her to find any way I can to help her with this.

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**A: ok, then hire a good attorney to protect her.

Does anyone have constructive recommendations?

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Call CPS if she is being abused. There is nothing more YOU can do.

Another thing that was suggested to her was emancipation, what could anyone productively tell me about this option and how it would or would not apply?

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Emancipation does not apply in this case. The girl would have to be IN SCHOOL (no GED) working, have her own health insurance and be able to live completely on her own. There are about a dozen emancipations granted each year in the whole COUNTRY. These are very exceptional cases. You are getting one side of this story, there is another.

Ummm... perhaps CPS didn't remove her because her parents encouraged her to get a GED after she dropped out of school, and they keep a rather tight leash on her after she decided drugs might be a good idea?

Why would you want to live with an alcohol/drug abusing high school drop-out who JUST turned 17 anyway? Bleh.

I was 17 when I left home. Moved a few hours away, different state, got an apartment with a roommate, etc. But I had my mom's blessing to do-so. At any point between the day I moved out and when I turned 18, if my mom had said that I needed to get my a$$ home, I would have had no choice but to do exactly that.

I wish to thank you all for your helpful (and not so helpful) remarks on the situation at hand. I spoke to a friend who is an attorney in my hometown. He was able to give me the advice and information that we were seeking. While his primary advice was for me to run, fast, and separate myself from the whole situation... he was also able to tell me that he thought that she had a good case for emancipation, that in our state a G.E.D. DID indeed replace a high school diploma, and that there was still the chance, though ever so slim, that her parents may permit such an arrangement.

to CJane:
1. I said she had experimented- past tense- with the drugs... and while, yes, she does enjoy alcohol, she is not an alcoholic, and in the past 4 months she has kept it out of her system... part of the point i was trying to make was faulty, but part of it still stands-her father provided the alcohol.

2. Perhaps i did not convey the G.E.D. point clearly. Her parents encouraged her to take the G.E.D while she was in high school, not to redeem her after she dropped out.

I despise drug users, I am not going to defend her for having used them, she tells me she has been clean nearly a year, I can say that she most certainly hasn't used them in 6 months, as our employer does drug testing as part of employee screening, and at random intervals.

To Bay State
She has been gainfully employed for 6 months, in this state a GED replaces a H.S. diploma, while she does not currently have her own medical coverage, she is eligible through our employer.

she may or may not be able to achieve Emancipation, but my attorney thought so.

in any case, It is out of my hands.

When I came here i was not necessarily looking for anyone to tell me i was right, but to tell me why I was wrong in the eyes of the law. while partly i did receive that, i do not see how people making assumptions or accusations about her character or mine could have aided in that advice in any way.