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Parents controlling trust, not working out.

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LOST IN LAW

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? CA
I was in a car accident when I was 19 years old (about 3.5 years ago) and was paralyzed from about the mid chest, down. It was not my fault and I was compensated by the responsible's insurance company. When the financial end of it happened, it was put into a trust account where my parents, sister, and uncle are trustees. Well, since then, my parents have proven that they cannot manage this properly for me. When I have a bill due, I give them a request form which gets backburnered because "they don't feel like dealing with it." I call to find out the status since at that point, my bills are late, I have late charges, finance charges and other issues come out of this (credit line decreases, finance charges going to "default rates" etc). When I call them to find out status, they avoid my calls, NEVER return my calls and when I DO get a hold of them, they say they have been busy. I know this is not true as I know their lifestyle. Keep in mind that they have not exactly been responsible with their own finances. Their credit is not fantastic by any means. They have been on a huge power trip ever since. I have expressed that I would like them to remove themselves from the trust and they refuse. They also have said that if I do remove the money from my trust I will have to repay what medical paid for my injuries when I went to the hospital. I dont know if thats true or how much I would have to pay. I have spoken to my trust manager and he has been little help as well. He has listened to the BS my mother has given him and I feel that he is pitted against me also. He seems to talk down to me, like I am bothering him, whenever I call. I really don't know where to start here as my parents set all this up and have said there is nothing I can do, they rule it. I am fed up with it and it has ruined my relationship 100% with my parents. My mother told me "not to call here anymore" the last time I called to try to wrk this stuff out. They say that I only call when I need to talk about my trust. Well that because I have to call constantly (a couple times a week) to try to get something accomplished so the calls end up being (when they ever answer the phone) something like "hey, have you turned in my request form? I need to get my bills paid." The really scary thing to me is that when I talk about this stuff, they say things like "I'M NOT PAYING..." as if it were their money and I keep calling to borrow it from them and have said "you wouldn't even have this money if it weren't for us" (they went to bat for me when I was in the hospital, and when I got out, which of course I appreciate) like I owe them or something. They also decided to add themselves, and their cars to my insurance (my mom must have called the insurance company, saying she was me to do this) and didn't tell me. When I moved, I went online to change the address on my insurance and saw their cars there. When I asked why I was paying their insurance (I checked my billing and saw one payment for the whole policy), my dad got all defensive, raised his voice and said "I PAID MY AMOUNT ON YOUR INSURANCE." He told me that he gave a check to my trust manager for his amount for the insurance. I called my trust manager and asked him and he said that he didn't know what I was talking about and as far as he knows, my car is the only one on my insurance. When I got a hold of my dad to ask him again, he said "well we couldn't afford our insurance so we added it to yours and just turned in the request form with the bill." I asked why he didn't just tell me the truth (thats my biggest issue here) he said he didn't know. My dad has copies of my request forms where my uncle and sister have signed one and he made copies of the blank signed ones so that the only signatures needed are his and my moms. I don't think they have done any more wrong doing here but I don't know for sure. They have become different people than the ones I used to know. It's sad and it hurts.
Anyways, I don't know if I need a lawyer but it seems so. I don't know what I should do before contacting a lawyer and I don't know what kind of lawyer to get, where to find one and what I will end up losing paying one. If there was a way to just have my parents removed from my trust, that would be best. There are a couple of other people I trust to replace them while leaving my sister and uncle on there.
Please help me, I am so lost... :(
Thanks
 
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las365

Senior Member
Lost, your story would be easier to read if you break it up into paragraphs.

Regardless, though, tranquility is correct. You need to get a lawyer who is experienced in this kind of matter and petition the court to make the appropriate changes to the Trust.

I do not have experience in trust matters (and I am not an attorney) so I don't know what your odds are of being able to dissolve the current trust and transfer the money into a diferent structure like an annuity or a different trust, or if all you can do is try to change the trustees and trust manager.

Your strategy and goals will depend partly on your condition and prognosis. You should also consider the influence that your parents might have on your sister and your uncle. Choosing trustees and a trust manager are very difficult and important decisions. Are you expected to be able to handle your own affairs in the future? It sounds as if your injuries were physical and you didn't suffer any mental incapacity that would prevent you from being able to be in charge of the money.

Trusts and annuities are valuable tools to protect the bulk of the settlement monies and provide money for you to live on and for medical expenses. I'm not suggesting that you should just get the cash and handle it yourself.
 

candg918

Member
I'll pass on a suggestion our financial advisor made to us regarding a trust for our disabled child.

Choose an institution with a trust department (like a local bank) as the trustee. That takes the family out of the picture. The trust officer at of your bank should have some suggestions on how to make the change occur.
 

Dandy Don

Senior Member
Have the trustees paid ANY of your bills (for example, when the trust was first started), or are they only just recently stalling on paying your bills?

Who selected the people as trustees, you, or did they nominate themselves to do this?

Do they also have a signed power of attorney from you authorizing them to handle all of your money? Are you capable of handling your own money for your basic living expenses now or does someone else do this for you?

How much was your settlement for, and did you sign any paperwork regarding receiving the settlement money and how it was to be set up in the trust?

Were you represented by an attorney during the settlement negotiations?

You have nothing to lose by consulting a trust attorney. The trustees had a legal responsibility to provide you with an annual accounting statement and copies of tax returns for each year the trust has been in existence, but you or your attorney must ask the trustee for this information by sending the trustee a certified letter, and also ask for a copy of the trust account's current and previous bank statements (perhaps for a few months).

The trustee's reluctance to pay reasonable expenses is a little bit troubling and if they are not just being mean and spiteful could be an indication that they may be misappropriating funds or have done so in the past and they are becoming uncomfortable about your delving into this because they don't want to be found out. Your attorney can advise you how to request that a trustee's bond be purchased to protect your financial interest as a beneficiary from potential theft by the trustees. Discuss with your attorney whether it would be feasible for you to request an audit (whose expense would be deducted from the trust) to determine whether the trustee's actions so far have been responsible or not.

And you may want to consider removing your sister and your uncle as trustees since there is truly no need for so many people to be trustee and they are probably kowtowing to the demands of your father and mother anyway and there seems to be no reason for them to be even involved. After you have received the accounting information and tax returns you will have better evidence to base a decision on whether to remove all of the trustees or not.

DANDY DON IN OKLAHOMA ([email protected])
 

Dandy Don

Senior Member
If there was no formal trust instrument drawn up and the money is in a trust ACCOUNT, then you do not need a trust attorney--a business law attorney can assist you with all the details.
 

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