Second marriage inheritance issues

What is the name of your state? Ohio

My first husband died unexpectedly in 1991. I was in my mid-30s when this occurred. He was 12.5 years my senior. His children were all 18 y/o plus at the time of his death. Ours was my first marriage; it was his second. He had three children from his first marriage; I had none and we had no children together. Each of our wills specified that if one of us died, the other was the sole inheritor of all assets. Upon the death of the surviving spouse, 50% of net assets were to go to his three children; 50% of net assets were to go to my nieces and nephews.

Today, I am remarried. Both of my parents have died. I received a small inheritance from their estate when my mother died. I took that money and invested it in the home my husband & I live in. I have several investments that I have maintained since my first husband's death. They are worth about $400K or so, --- difficult in this volatile market. I also have a retirement plan at the private, non-profit I work for, along with several IRAs.

My question is this --- how can I best honor the promise I made to my first husband to ensure some inheritance goes to his children? While I love the fellow I am married to now, I do not necessary want to rely on him to honor a promise I made to someone else.

I wish now I had insisted on a pre-nup before marriage #2, but I wasn't thinking about these sticky issues at the time...add to the fact that husband #2's three adult children have not treated me well & I would be just as happy if they did not profit from the hard work of me & my first husband or that of my mother & father (hard, I know as I invested that money in the home I share with my spouse).

What would be the best way to structure things now, hopefully in a way that will minimize unpleasantness with my husband now?

Thanks in advance for your responses.

You are not bound to honor the original reciprocal will--you are free to keep your will the same or change it if you wish.

You do not have to show your husband your will while you are still alive--after you die, it is your wishes that will be carried out and it will be too late for him to do anything about that. He's going to do what he wants with his assets, so you should do the same.

If you prefer, you can name single or multiple beneficiaries to the 401K account and IRA's by filling out beneficiary designation form from each asset holder. You may want to consult with the 401K company to find out their rules and regulations for handling beneficiary designations--it may be federal law that requires a certain portion of the 401K money automatically goes to your husband as a surviving spouse. Any other assets can be covered by your will.

DANDY DON IN OKLAHOMA ([email protected])

Greetings:

Of course it will prudent if you consult an experienced estate attorney who is familiar with the laws of inheritance in your jurisdiction.

Some states make specific provisions for those in in-law/step-in law situations such as yours and for you to try and divvy things up without the careful help of a legal professional will just cause those left behind additional heart-ache & un-neccesary expense.

Good luck with it all and kudos to you for trying to accomplish that as far as you see it, the right thing is done.

Now IS the time.