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Enforcing Divorce Decree???

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FLexWife

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? Florida

I was divorced in July of 07. I was awarded permanent alimony, which was not to commence until house was sold.

I had the house listed once but it was through the local 2% realty and it did not attract much attention.

I then screened potential real estate agents and my x was involved, however it takes both signatures to start the process. This was over 6 months ago and he hasn't to this day did anything about selling our home.

Now....here are my questions. It's hard to put this all in writing as this has been an ongoing pulling teeth session with the x. I am tired....

1. He was supposed to take me off his health insurance and add me to COBRA. To this date he has not done so. Yet now he is remarried. Isn't that against the law?

2. He does not do any maintenance at all in our home. The sprinkler pump went out over 6 months ago and our landscaping has all but died. The pump is rolling around somewhere in the back of his truck. Who knows.

3. I do not receive any sort of spousal support yet as the house is not sold. I work a part time job due to health issues. He currently makes over 160,000 a year and remarried a few months ago.....is this not dual income now?

4. The electricity, water and phone have been turned off several times since the divorce.

5. The house payment is over 2 months behind and I am constantly getting default letters in the mail.

6. Have received a few calls from car finance company in reference to my vehicle being late and reposession is pending.


In my divorce settlement, I received permanent alimony, my vehicle, 60% equity in house, marital portion of his retirement and health insurance. But this will not start until house is sold. He was ordered to continue all payments on home and utilites until it sells. Yet he will not HELP in anyway to sell the house. My car is financed through his name so I cannot get any info on the payments. The same applies to the home mortgage. I have little contact with him. The contact I do have, well**************let's just say it all boils down to him lying and putting things off.

For 2+ years and now 8 months post divorce I live day to day wondering what will be turned off, repossed or if they are forclosing on our home. I live paycheck to paycheck and cannot afford to upkeep my home and do normal repairs on it. The house is only 6 years old and still worth quite a bit in this market. But due to the normal repairs and landscaping.

I earlier mentioned that he was remarried a few months ago. Secretly in a provence of the US.

Can I file a Motion To Show Cause?

Can I file for Temp Emeregency Alimony

Can I file something that will make him take an active interest in this house? Or am I to just let it go and the house is sold at the lowest amount.

Can I file a lienn on his wages (Federal Government) to ensure all ordered payments are made and on time?

Can I file a lien against his retirement ensuring he doesn't uhm....sneak it away?

Can I file a motion to have him reinstate me on his Life Insurance Policy to ensure my permanent alimony?

This has all been madness.

Thank you in advance for any suggestions or help you may have.

FLexWife.
 


Ohiogal

Queen Bee
What is the name of your state? Florida

I was divorced in July of 07. I was awarded permanent alimony, which was not to commence until house was sold.

I had the house listed once but it was through the local 2% realty and it did not attract much attention.

I then screened potential real estate agents and my x was involved, however it takes both signatures to start the process. This was over 6 months ago and he hasn't to this day did anything about selling our home.
Okay who is paying the mortgage? Was there a date ordered by which time the house should be listed?


Now....here are my questions. It's hard to put this all in writing as this has been an ongoing pulling teeth session with the x. I am tired....

1. He was supposed to take me off his health insurance and add me to COBRA. To this date he has not done so. Yet now he is remarried. Isn't that against the law?
Most likely it is fraud quite frankly. Why haven't you gone for COBRA? Who is supposed to pay for COBRA? How do you know you are still on his insurance? What does the order state about COBRA?


2. He does not do any maintenance at all in our home. The sprinkler pump went out over 6 months ago and our landscaping has all but died. The pump is rolling around somewhere in the back of his truck. Who knows.
You live there correct? So what do you do for maintenance? Where is YOUR responsibility in this?

3. I do not receive any sort of spousal support yet as the house is not sold. I work a part time job due to health issues. He currently makes over 160,000 a year and remarried a few months ago.....is this not dual income now?
NOPE. His wife has NO responsibility to you. Aren't you greedy?
4. The electricity, water and phone have been turned off several times since the divorce.
Who is responsible for that per the court order? If no one is mentioned, then guess what -- is YOUR responsibility.
5. The house payment is over 2 months behind and I am constantly getting default letters in the mail.
Is he supposed to make the house payment? IF so, take him back to court for contempt.

6. Have received a few calls from car finance company in reference to my vehicle being late and reposession is pending.
Is he supposed to pay your car payment according to the COURT order?

In my divorce settlement, I received permanent alimony, my vehicle, 60% equity in house, marital portion of his retirement and health insurance. But this will not start until house is sold. He was ordered to continue all payments on home and utilites until it sells.
Well it doesn't say ANYTHING about him being responsible for paying your car payment.
You get possession but that doesn't mean he has to pay for it. There is no such thing as a marital portion of health insurance.

Yet he will not HELP in anyway to sell the house. My car is financed through his name so I cannot get any info on the payments. The same applies to the home mortgage.
So that is why he has to pay the mortgage rather than pay you alimony. Because he is responsible for it. Now what is the time limit to sell the house?

I have little contact with him. The contact I do have, well**************let's just say it all boils down to him lying and putting things off.
YOu got a pretty good deal going. You think you have to pay for NOTHING and your ex gets to support you for life.

For 2+ years and now 8 months post divorce I live day to day wondering what will be turned off, repossed or if they are forclosing on our home. I live paycheck to paycheck and cannot afford to upkeep my home and do normal repairs on it. The house is only 6 years old and still worth quite a bit in this market. But due to the normal repairs and landscaping.
YOUR HOME? NOpe. Not your home if you are not on the deed.


I earlier mentioned that he was remarried a few months ago. Secretly in a provence of the US.

Can I file a Motion To Show Cause?
What is the EXACT wording of your divorce decree?

Can I file for Temp Emeregency Alimony
No. You have alimony. It is called a roof over your head, utilities and you pay nothing.

Can I file something that will make him take an active interest in this house? Or am I to just let it go and the house is sold at the lowest amount.
You can try to file a motion to force him to sell the house.

Can I file a lienn on his wages (Federal Government) to ensure all ordered payments are made and on time?
Nope. He doesn't owe you money at this point. He owes the electric company, mortgage company, and other utilities money. But not you.
Can I file a lien against his retirement ensuring he doesn't uhm....sneak it away?
Oh you didn't a QDRO completed on retirement? You should have paid to have that done. Why wasn't it?
Can I file a motion to have him reinstate me on his Life Insurance Policy to ensure my permanent alimony?

Permanent only lasts until his death. OR yours. YOu have no claims on his life insurance. Are you trying to renegotiate your divorce? Are you going to school to get trained to do something. You can work so apparently you are not completely disabled. So go get training and support yourself.
This has all been madness.
That is what happens when you are not financially self sufficient quite frankly.

Thank you in advance for any suggestions or help you may have.

FLexWife.
You need to take control of your situation by learning how to earn some money quite frankly. If he dies tomorrow alimony ends.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Quite frankly, I am surprized that someone making 160k a year would be willing to tank their credit to the extent that he is apparently tanking his. That does not bode well for future collectibility of alimony.
 

Gracie3787

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? Florida

I was divorced in July of 07. I was awarded permanent alimony, which was not to commence until house was sold.

I had the house listed once but it was through the local 2% realty and it did not attract much attention.

I then screened potential real estate agents and my x was involved, however it takes both signatures to start the process. This was over 6 months ago and he hasn't to this day did anything about selling our home.

Now....here are my questions. It's hard to put this all in writing as this has been an ongoing pulling teeth session with the x. I am tired....

1. He was supposed to take me off his health insurance and add me to COBRA. To this date he has not done so. Yet now he is remarried. Isn't that against the law?

2. He does not do any maintenance at all in our home. The sprinkler pump went out over 6 months ago and our landscaping has all but died. The pump is rolling around somewhere in the back of his truck. Who knows.

3. I do not receive any sort of spousal support yet as the house is not sold. I work a part time job due to health issues. He currently makes over 160,000 a year and remarried a few months ago.....is this not dual income now?

4. The electricity, water and phone have been turned off several times since the divorce.

5. The house payment is over 2 months behind and I am constantly getting default letters in the mail.

6. Have received a few calls from car finance company in reference to my vehicle being late and reposession is pending.


In my divorce settlement, I received permanent alimony, my vehicle, 60% equity in house, marital portion of his retirement and health insurance. But this will not start until house is sold. He was ordered to continue all payments on home and utilites until it sells. Yet he will not HELP in anyway to sell the house. My car is financed through his name so I cannot get any info on the payments. The same applies to the home mortgage. I have little contact with him. The contact I do have, well**************let's just say it all boils down to him lying and putting things off.

For 2+ years and now 8 months post divorce I live day to day wondering what will be turned off, repossed or if they are forclosing on our home. I live paycheck to paycheck and cannot afford to upkeep my home and do normal repairs on it. The house is only 6 years old and still worth quite a bit in this market. But due to the normal repairs and landscaping.

I earlier mentioned that he was remarried a few months ago. Secretly in a provence of the US.

Can I file a Motion To Show Cause?

Can I file for Temp Emeregency Alimony

Can I file something that will make him take an active interest in this house? Or am I to just let it go and the house is sold at the lowest amount.

Can I file a lienn on his wages (Federal Government) to ensure all ordered payments are made and on time?

Can I file a lien against his retirement ensuring he doesn't uhm....sneak it away?

Can I file a motion to have him reinstate me on his Life Insurance Policy to ensure my permanent alimony?

This has all been madness.

Thank you in advance for any suggestions or help you may have.

FLexWife.
Anything that the court has specifically ordered and ex is not doing- yes, you can file a motion for contempt.

Your ex is only required to pay for items that are specifically stated in the divorce. If he was SPECIFICALLY ordered to pay for repairs on the home, and he has not fixed the sprinkler pump, you should call a local repair company to fix it. Then you can add that reciept to your motion. (A repair shouldn't be very much if you can get the pump back from ex, my ex and I owned/worked an irrigation business for 10 years and pump repairs are not very expensive for a homeowner).

If your court order does not give a specific timetable for the sale of home, you can also file for a modification to have that added.
 

FLexWife

Junior Member
He pays the mortgage as he normally did throughout our entire many many years of marriage. I took care of the food, clothing, extras for the house, and others things.
Like I said, I work part time due to health reasons. So no, I am not a greedy person. I have worked at the same job for 10+ years.
The order states H shall keep health insurance on me for 4 years through his place of employment. I know I am still on his insurance because I asked him for one, the other is I had MAJOR surgery (health condition) a few months ago and insurance company still has me on.

Order states upon final divorce we are both to find a realtor. I found one, he did not. WE met with mine, liked them....but never returned to sign any papers. I have called, I have emailed I have texted.
As far as what do i do for maintenance. I do it all. The grass, the repairs on household items, pressure wash sidewalks, house, roof. I repair lawn equiptment. You may think this is not big deal, but being alone and trying to take care of everything that came with a house we both bought so we both could take care of it is not that easy of a task. But I have been doing it for over 2.5 years.
As far as his wife having no repsonsibility to me, she does. You see....they cohabitated for over a year before divorce was final. He hid that. Now he is married. Now his income and expenses are different, actually they were different when he signed a legal document. Again you use the word greedy. It was not I that was greedy, it was the other woman. So now they have a combined income of over 200,000.00 a year. Miine is under 36.
I am not trying to be greedy, I am trying to move forward with my life, yet he is the one failing to abide by the law.
Per the court order he is resonsible for all house payments and utilites. Per the court order I am to keep my vehicle he is to pay the payments.
In the state of Florida, as his wife when we bought the home. I am on the deed. I am not on the financing, but yes....I am on the deed!!! So yes, it is MY HOME!
In many states, including Florida, the spouse who is to receive alimony can and is entitled to have a court order of life insurance as protection of alimony. Who is to say he doesn't oneday go completly knockers and drive into a pole? That would not be my fault nor would it be greedy.

Ohiogal, I beg to differ on what has been madness. My financial capablility has nothing to do with the madness of it all.

You see, he is the one that wanted the divorce. He is the one that had an affiar, he is the one one that abandoned our home. He was also the one that agreed to all of the above in mediation. Yes, he wanted it. The grass is/was apparently greener somewhere. Between the time he left and now....he is almost in financial ruin. Not because of me.....because he couldn't handle the responsibility of a wife and a home. He loves loves loves credit cards. He actually kept his 70K in credit card debt. His credit score has went from well over 700 to under 400. This is a man who is a supervisor in a federal job. This is a man who oneday was loving and kind, whom the next day snuck out of our home while I was at work.

Please do not call me greedy for something I did not ask for. How rude of you. I am simply looking for a way to legally bind him to what he already agreed upon. By the way, my alimony is MUCH LESS than the mortgage and utilites on our home. Oh....did I mention that he keeps with the little suggestions that he will come home oneday? Uh huh. Something is amiss.....and all you an say is I am greeedy. Hmmmm....you had a really bad divorce eh Ohiogal?

To me.....this is becoming emotional harrasement. Why won't he help sell the house? In this case, it was not cheaper to keep her.

Ldij.....thank you. You are correct. He has "tanked" his entire life to have and marry a woman years younger than he is. Why is it that I am considered greedy to protect my future. A future we once had all planned together.

I do have an appointment with my divorce attorney tomorrow. I shall come and post his response to this.

Sigh.....we all should remember that not all is what it seems, and before we cast judgement on others we should delve a bit deeper.

FLexWife
 

Ohiogal

Queen Bee
His wife owes you NOTHING. NOTHING AT ALL. You earn over 36k a year working parttime? That is sweet. Many people working full time don't earn that much. Consider yourself extremely lucky. If you can't afford the house move to something you can afford. Plain and simple.
HIS WIFE OWES YOU NOTHING.
As for rude? Poor baby. Should I sugarcoat it for you? HIS WIFE OWES YOU NOTHING. HER INCOME MATTERS NOT! Nothing. Nada zip zilch zero. She has nothing to do with your marriage or the end thereof legally. DEAL.
I wasn't rude. I was honest. Deal with it.
 

Bali Hai

Senior Member
His wife owes you NOTHING. NOTHING AT ALL. You earn over 36k a year working parttime? That is sweet. Many people working full time don't earn that much. Consider yourself extremely lucky. If you can't afford the house move to something you can afford. Plain and simple.
HIS WIFE OWES YOU NOTHING.
As for rude? Poor baby. Should I sugarcoat it for you? HIS WIFE OWES YOU NOTHING. HER INCOME MATTERS NOT! Nothing. Nada zip zilch zero. She has nothing to do with your marriage or the end thereof legally. DEAL
I wasn't rude. I was honest. Deal with it.[/QUOTE

A free backrub going to OG!!, all the way down to the bottom of the feet...and anywhere else she wants!!!:):)
 

FLexWife

Junior Member
Ohiogal

Your bitterness towards something is really showing. Yes...someone give her a backrub. :)

Her income DOES matter. It leads to a change in his income. They are considered "Dual" incomes. When the paying xspouse has to provide a new financial statement the added income will most certaintly be reflected. This is most often found when the paying spouse is not meeting his financial obligations due to the NEW SPOUSE and how it impacts their lifestyle.

The same would apply to the receiving spouse. If the recieving spouse remarries or cohabitates then the alimony would more than likely be "Terminated", due to added income.

You are correct that the Other Person Legally has nothing to do with the demise of a marriage, BUT the Judge will take into consideration the "Adultering" spouse when considering alimony. Therefore, Other Persons do play a part.

Why should I move? I've lived here for many many years. I am holding up to my legal obligations, he is not. I would think your anwsers would be directed more towards the legalities of "Non Compliance" even if the xspouse remarries or not?

Ohiogal, your rudeness has nothing to do with sugar coating the law. But perhaps you should educate yourself a bit more before you start being "honest". Especially if your giving advice on a legal forum. Your not a lawyer are you?:confused: Naaa....you couldn't be giving out advice like you do.

Divorce is ugly. Adulterous spouses are even moresoe. So they get married and live happily ever after. Fine, sobeit. However, the xspouse should still protect themselves financially. The spouse seeking the divorce may take a downward spiral financially. Some even incur enormous debt trying to appease their youngernew wife. Why should the left behind spouse suffer? After all.....just because their income is not as much as the others.....doesn't mean we did not work as hard or contribute in helping the xspouse achieve the higher earning potential.

Best regards,

FLexWife
 

tuffbrk

Senior Member
You mentioned you have an attorney? That's good as you really need one to educate you on the law.

  • Your Ex's wife does not have any responsibility to support you sweetie.
  • The divorce action was based on what? Your husband committing adultery? Is that what is stated and was proven in court? If not, no one cares if he committed adultery - it was pre-divorce.
  • Cohabitation on your part only affects alimony if your divorce decree notes it as a reason to terminate alimony and/or the alimony amount is modifiable. By the way, it is not automatically assumed by the courts that cohabitation means that the party residing with you is contributing to your expenses.
  • Ohiogal is an attorney - family law is her specialty!!
 

FLexWife

Junior Member
:D Tiny tantrum.....too cute!!

It's ok if Ohiogal does not post on my thread, goodness, if my tiny tantrum would stop her from posting her well thought out legal advice, I would be concerned how she handled and actual case. Or perhaps she doesn't like it if someone points our a tiny mistake?? I've read many of her posts, I do see similarity of her response to others, and I see similar responses to her like mine were. Besides, I like to hear truthful legal answers. I'm quite over the feeling sorry myself. I've tried to handle this divorce in a "strictly business" matter without my emotions hindering my decisions.

Florida is a no fault state. You can file for divorce if you don't like the outfit your spouse wore yesterday. Again, like I've said.....adultery does play a part when seeking alimony, You can google that one easily enough. Adultery pre-divorce, during divorce and after divorce does have an impact on a Judges decision when deciding on Alimony or not.

Listen, I did not write the laws, nor have I changed any laws. I do like to be educated before I make decisions on whats to be done next. Of course I will make these decisions for my best interest. I'm human. Who wouldn't?

No, him now being married does not affect my case. HOWEVER, if he continues to default on the divorce agreement and he has to go back and show cause why he is not paying what has been ordered, then the wifes income will play a roll. Her income and her portion of the marrital bills will lessen his bills. I guess you could look at it as he now pays less than he was as she has taken over some of his daily living expenses. If he were to provide another Financial Affidavit it would be much different than the previous one.

Yes I understand the cohabiation rules. For the spouse receiving alimony, they cannot mix funds if they are residing with another person.

Yes, it was a very good thing that I saw my attorney. I would suggest everyone here does that and not be dependant upon the answers they receive here. Good thing I didn't....;)
 

FLexWife

Junior Member
no

he is not saying her income affects my alimony.....it affects my xh's.

listen......i have not received any alimony in 9 months. he has not listed the house. the alimony and settlement was agreed upon the house selling for a certain price, 6 months later the bottom fell out of the housing market. now the house is worth 120k less than 3 months post divorce.

if he were to force me to sell the house.....this would cause the alimony to be re-worked or else he could simply offer more of the equity, thus equalling out the 50/50...if not then he has to re-do his financial statement.

by him being married now.....his financial statement will be different, her income affects his income. They now share expenses, thus causing his expenses to go down.

So no.....her income does not directly have anything to do with my alimony, it has more to do with his increase in income.

Remember.....this was calculated over a year ago....he has made no attempt to even remotly sell the house.

So the loss of equity in the house DOES affect the formula that was used to determine Alimony. His increase in income will affect the formula**************50/50 is to balance or equitable portions.
 
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