Ex won't respond

What is the name of your state? Ilinois

I have been separated for 4 years and i don't know where my ex lives and she will not respond to my phone calls. There are no children, no property and no debts between us. I gave her an additonal $25,000 when we sold the house and she agreed not to go after my pension, we were married 3 years before I left. i continue to pay for her medical insurance.

** Can i file or get a divorce without her signature?
** can i remove her from my medical insurance?

kriso said:

What is the name of your state? Ilinois

I have been separated for 4 years and i don't know where my ex lives and she will not respond to my phone calls. There are no children, no property and no debts between us. I gave her an additonal $25,000 when we sold the house and she agreed not to go after my pension, we were married 3 years before I left. i continue to pay for her medical insurance.

** Can i file or get a divorce without her signature?
** can i remove her from my medical insurance?

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I would strongly recommend NOT removing her from your medical insurance until you are legally divorced (and the divorce is final). Doing that could cause you serious grief. You are still legally married, and if you cancel her medical insurance, and then something happens to her that causes serious medical bills, a judge could (probably would) hold you liable for cancelling her insurance.

You can get divorced without her signature, but you cannot get divorced without serving her, although it may be possible to do so via publication.

You really need a consult with a local attorney, this is not a DIY project.

Once I file, if she contests and wants to go after my pension,

**will they look at the date of separation which was 4 years ago or the final date of divorce? we were married 3 1/2 years before i moved out and I was employed 7 years before we married

**Also, will the courts consider that she got an additional $50k from the house i owned for 16 years before she moved in and that she agreed the 50K would be in lieu of any percentage of my pension? i have a written letter she signed.

kriso said:

Once I file, if she contests and wants to go after my pension,

**will they look at the date of separation which was 4 years ago or the final date of divorce? we were married 3 1/2 years before i moved out and I was employed 7 years before we married

**Also, will the courts consider that she got an additional $50k from the house i owned for 16 years before she moved in and that she agreed the 50K would be in lieu of any percentage of my pension? i have a written letter she signed.

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She is entitled to half your pension that accrued during the marriage and you are still married.

You gave her an additional $25k just this week??

She rec'd 75k and i rec'd 25k from the sale of the home in 6/06. she rec'd the addl in lieu of seeking a percentage of my pension.

kriso said:

She rec'd 75k and i rec'd 25k from the sale of the home in 6/06. she rec'd the addl in lieu of seeking a percentage of my pension.

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Unfortunately, this isn't going to hold much weight unless you can convince the judge that you both agreed to it (that is, if she says she never agreed to releasing your pension and the extra $25 K was a gift, you might be in trouble).

OTOH, since you're not yet married, the extra $25 K (the entire $100 K, for that matter) would be marital assets, so it may not matter.

You need to get an attorney and get the whole thing settled ASAP. If you and she agree on the terms, it will help to keep the time and expense down.

Thanks,

Just curious, would the house be considered a non-marital asset since I owned it before I met her? if it was, then could I have not shared the equity when it was sold? what would be the chances of having the courts order her to repay me the add'l i gave her should she seek part of my pension?

I will be hiriing a lawyer, but I thought I would file myself first and see if she doesn't respond. I understand it could then be settled as a default divorce.