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Medical insurance while separated and divorced

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jacintoman

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? CA

I am about to file for legal separation from my wife. Problem is, the medical insurance is via my employer. My soon-to-be-ex pretends that she is self employed, hence no way of getting health insurance without costing her an arm and a leg. Due to her income being too low compared to mine, I have a feeling that I will be hit with a spousal support request. My marriage is a little more than 6 years old, so I am assuming she can get a small amount of alimony/support for a limited time. The thing I do not want to be left with is to pay for her cobra or similar health insurance premiums since she will no longer be my dependent.

Even though I can almost say I hate her, I still do not wish anything bad for her and do not want her to be without medical coverage. You may say "how stupid of you" but this is me. And I am not doing extremely well to afford two households with my limited income.

I have a feeling that, during the separation, I can keep her on my insurance as a dependent since we are not officially divorced, but, if I am not going to marry or get into a serious relationship anytime too soon, can I still keep her in my health insurance as my dependent after the divorce is final, until she gets a job to have her own insurance ? Like saying that she is my fiancee or similar whom I do not share the same address. What are the legal ramifications of this ?

Also, in a kind of related question, is it okay to live in the same house while being legally separated as we both look for our own place to live, as the house waits for a sale ? Other than the awkwardness of the situation, what other legal issues can there be in such a setting ?
 


mistoffolees

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? CA

I am about to file for legal separation from my wife. Problem is, the medical insurance is via my employer. My soon-to-be-ex pretends that she is self employed, hence no way of getting health insurance without costing her an arm and a leg. Due to her income being too low compared to mine, I have a feeling that I will be hit with a spousal support request. My marriage is a little more than 6 years old, so I am assuming she can get a small amount of alimony/support for a limited time. The thing I do not want to be left with is to pay for her cobra or similar health insurance premiums since she will no longer be my dependent.

Even though I can almost say I hate her, I still do not wish anything bad for her and do not want her to be without medical coverage. You may say "how stupid of you" but this is me. And I am not doing extremely well to afford two households with my limited income.

I have a feeling that, during the separation, I can keep her on my insurance as a dependent since we are not officially divorced, but, if I am not going to marry or get into a serious relationship anytime too soon, can I still keep her in my health insurance as my dependent after the divorce is final, until she gets a job to have her own insurance ? Like saying that she is my fiancee or similar whom I do not share the same address. What are the legal ramifications of this ?

Also, in a kind of related question, is it okay to live in the same house while being legally separated as we both look for our own place to live, as the house waits for a sale ? Other than the awkwardness of the situation, what other legal issues can there be in such a setting ?
Don't do it on the insurance. You could find yourself with no insurance (and possibly forced to reimburse any claims paid) if they find out. Once you are divorced, she is not legally your dependent. You can say she's your fiancee if you wish, but that doesn't help you since few insurers are going to cover a fiancee under your plan. But even if they do, you're committing fraud - and it could come back to bite you.

When you divorce her, she will probably be entitled to keep up the insurance by paying the COBRA payments. It's not cheap, but is usually less than she'd pay for comparable insurance on her own.

I can't help you on the house thing.
 

LdiJ

Senior Member
Don't do it on the insurance. You could find yourself with no insurance (and possibly forced to reimburse any claims paid) if they find out. Once you are divorced, she is not legally your dependent. You can say she's your fiancee if you wish, but that doesn't help you since few insurers are going to cover a fiancee under your plan. But even if they do, you're committing fraud - and it could come back to bite you.

When you divorce her, she will probably be entitled to keep up the insurance by paying the COBRA payments. It's not cheap, but is usually less than she'd pay for comparable insurance on her own.

I can't help you on the house thing.
I disagree with the bolded portion. Cobras are often MORE expensive than private policies. If someone is healthy, then a private policy is probably better. If someone has an ongoing medical issue to deal with, then the Cobra would be necessary.
 

Bali Hai

Senior Member
I disagree with the bolded portion. Cobras are often MORE expensive than private policies. If someone is healthy, then a private policy is probably better. If someone has an ongoing medical issue to deal with, then the Cobra would be necessary.
I agree, OP's wife is most likely a hypochondriac, will become one, or will try to convince the court she is sick (as most women do during divorce), and Cobra would be the way to go. It will be cheaper for her.
 

jacintoman

Junior Member
Thank you for all your insight. She is not yet a hypochondriac but she is not in good health. She smokes and she is extremely overweight, neither of which is helping her health situation. Also, she has a history of depression. I am sure, after the divorce, it will get much worse from what it looks like now.

I checked my company policy and it covers domestic partners, fiancees etc, a marital union is not necessary for the dependent to be covered. Cobra for her only will run her, and in turn me, down in the tune of $700-800 every month. Considering the judge will grant her some sort of spousal support payments and knowing I am not even saving the $700-800 per month, I will be going to deep end of finances. Hence, it looks like it will be best for me to keep her under my health insurance plan for the next year or two or until she bags another sucker to marry, whichever comes first to minimize the financial damage.

I know I am being stupid for someone I dislike but again, this is me. I can not stand to see anyone suffer as I know I can help them one way.
 

StampGirl

Senior Member
Let me help you. I went through a similar experience.

When my ex and I divorced, he was required to keep me on his insurance until the day the divorce was final. He then took those papers to his employer and they dropped me. Hence, I had no insurance. The kids, however, are still covered etc.

So.... She can look for her own insurance after the divorce is final. Its practically unheard of (esp in CA) making the spouse carry their Ex after the divorce esp since it was ONLY 6yrs. (so was mine)

She is a big girl. She will figure it out. I went without insurance and just paid cash if I got sick etc.

Hope that helps.
 

StampGirl

Senior Member
A SIX year marriage? Fight the spousal support thing!
I was given 18 months of spousal support. That was the time it would take me to get my degree and then be able to get a job. I hadn't worked since the kids were born and I was pregnant with the last one when our divorce was finalized.

My ex and I agreed to 36 months of spousal support but the original amount was divided in half. He paid the same amount of money yet got the tax deduction for twice as long. I never saw a dime of it technically. My spousal support went toward my half of the debt payments which were exactly what he would have sent me. (Debt payment was $600; my spousal support was $300) I paid off my half of remaining debt 2 weeks after my spousal support ended as I had sold my condo and had money.

Before you jump my case because I received spousal support and was only married for 6.5 yrs, the judge decided (without me asking for it) to grant it to me because I was enrolled in college and was close to finishing. My ex had no issue paying the support because he knew I was in school.
 

tuffbrk

Senior Member
I don't know which is more damaging - society expecting a person to continue to support an Ex or the Ex's that take the money as their due.
 

jacintoman

Junior Member
I don't know which is more damaging - society expecting a person to continue to support an Ex or the Ex's that take the money as their due.
Amen to that... you are preaching to the choir :)

In my case I am sure, she will find ways to accuse me, causing her stress and quitting her job because of me. So, even though there are no kids, I am expecting to get slammed with a spousal support. Only hoping that it will be something reasonable like below $500/mo. In our previous marital discord, when she brought up the "D" word the first time, about 2 years ago, she was hoping to get something close to 2K and yet she was working full time at that time. I am not sure what she was smoking then, but if there is any substantiation to her claim, I should be shaking in my proverbial boots now, as she has no regular income and no health insurance as soon as we are divorced.

In somewhat of a totally unrelated question, in a slightly thorny divorce like mine, how many hours should one expect to be billed by their lawyer on the average ? And can she ask me to pay for her attorney bills ?
 

tuffbrk

Senior Member
Well, that largely depends on the "slightly" thorny issues that may arise. Over a 3 yr period in my incredibly contentious divorce (custody issues as well as Spousal support) in which my now Ex fought me tooth and nail and delayed like no one's business- I was billed a total of 122 hrs.

My now Ex asked that I pay his attorneys fees - he was denied (NJ), although I wind up paying $3,750 as the judge ordered $7,500 of his attny's fees to be paid from the top of the sale of the house, prior to splitting the net proceeds. This was despite my absorbing increased attny fees due to the number of times that he and/or his attorney did not show up for court as ordered. Didn't make any sense that I s/b ordered to absorb any of the costs but he had gotten sick over the 3 yr timeframe the divorce took and was unemployed at the time of the divorce.

Family court (my opinion) is inconsistent with no true guidelines. To a degree it is understandable as there are so many variables to each party's case - but if someone is unemployed, chooses to obtain an attorney instead of using legal aid - why should the other party pay?

Aww...let me get off my soap box ranting!! Sorry - I guess truly whether you'll have to pay is largely dependent on whether the judge fought with his significant other or "got any" the night before they rule on your case. Not that I'm jaded or anything...
 

Bali Hai

Senior Member
I don't know which is more damaging - society expecting a person to continue to support an Ex or the Ex's that take the money as their due.
No matter how it is viewed by the courts, alimony is just plain BULLSH!T in the majority of cases. Judges are scared sh!tless NOT to order alimony for women.
 

StampGirl

Senior Member
Amazing how many women complete college WITHOUT someone giving them spousal support, or being married.
We had 3 children under the age of 5 and one wasn't even born when we was divorced. My ex willingly paid the spousal support so that I could finish college and get a good job and still care for our kids. He wanted me to go to school. So he helped me financially while I did so. Call it whatever you want, but he was generous and I was grateful.
 

mistoffolees

Senior Member
No matter how it is viewed by the courts, alimony is just plain BULLSH!T in the majority of cases.
No more bull**** than people who refuse to be responsible for their choices.

My ex-wife didn't work through the majority of our marriage. We jointly made that decision because the extra expenses and taxes for her working would have eaten up much of the extra income and we both felt that it was better for the kids for one parent to be home. In addition to giving up her career (which will have long term impact in terms of retirement and career path), she moved to further my career.

Alimony, while very painful, attempts to reconcile the fact that we jointly made a decision for her to stay home - at considerable harm to her career. Without alimony, I would have gotten all of the benefits, but not paid any of the cost. Alimony attempts to help her to get back on her feet to something close to where she would have been otherwise.

Do I like paying her 30% of my takehome pay (plus child support on top of that)? Of course not. But is it fair? I would say so.
 

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