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Colorado - Accessing Wireless Text Logs

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V

Vegs

Junior Member
Colorado - Caught The Wife In A Relationship About To Bubble

All - I am reaching out trying to better understand what legal leg I have to stand on here in Colorado.

I recently caught my wife in a relationship that was about to blossom but per her there was no sexual contact; however, they talk everyday and send each other tons of IM's each day. She said she started to flirt but when it got serious she backed out; however, she stills talk to him daily.

The cell phone company will not give me access to these said text messages and it appears the only way I can get eyes on those is to have them subpoenaed. I believe that those records will be the defining moment if I forgive her or just proceed forward with legal action.

I feel that I won't get access to these records without going forward with legal action and file for a divorce, but on the other hand if I can see that she was being 100% honest with me about this relationship that maybe our relationship can be reconciled.

Anyone have experience in this territory? What was the outcome?

Many thanks in advance, thank you for listening.
 


LdiJ

LdiJ

Senior Member
Vegs said:
Colorado - Caught The Wife In A Relationship About To Bubble

All - I am reaching out trying to better understand what legal leg I have to stand on here in Colorado.

I recently caught my wife in a relationship that was about to blossom but per her there was no sexual contact; however, they talk everyday and send each other tons of IM's each day. She said she started to flirt but when it got serious she backed out; however, she stills talk to him daily.

The cell phone company will not give me access to these said text messages and it appears the only way I can get eyes on those is to have them subpoenaed. I believe that those records will be the defining moment if I forgive her or just proceed forward with legal action.

I feel that I won't get access to these records without going forward with legal action and file for a divorce, but on the other hand if I can see that she was being 100% honest with me about this relationship that maybe our relationship can be reconciled.

Anyone have experience in this territory? What was the outcome?

Many thanks in advance, thank you for listening.
Click to expand...
My experience is that the wireless companies usually don't have the actual text messages themselves to provide, even with a subpoena. They have records of the dates and times the text messages were sent, but not the actual messages themselves.
 
justalayman

justalayman

Senior Member
if your wife will not show them to you, I would suggest she is still hiding her intent from you and you should act accordingly.

If you need to resort to such actions to prove her claim, I would not put much worth in that claim.

btw; there may be other surreptitious methods to gain the info you seek but again, if you need to resort to these methods, is there really a realtionship there to save?
 
D

diamond 300

Junior Member
Sorry for the pain you are going through. My soon to be EX huband claimed the same thing "Oh we were just talking". I find that where a person places their time is where the heart is. Why is she still involved if she cherishes her marriage and relationship with you. If she now knows it is causing a problem then she should be willing to give it up. Cheating is first emotional before it is ever physical.
 
V

Vegs

Junior Member
Thanks everyone for the responses. I may talk to a lawyer to see if they have experience in gaining access to the actual content of text messages. I want to believe my wifes story and we (well me) have since then somewhat reconciled but I believe the content of those messages will allow me to actually move forward whichever way that may be.

As bad timed as SingleAZdad's comment "Once a cheater..." was, I will always have that in the back of my mind because I too believe that "cheating is first emotional before it is ever physical"...I honestly do.

Being an analyst at profession and heart, I too cannot poke any holes in the comment, "if you need to resort to these methods, is there really a relationship there to save?" However, I have a lot to lose... A marriage of 12 years, two wonderful kids (one 12 and the other 3), a house, investments, physical and emmotional investments...

Maybe one of those Magic 8-Ball's would have the answers or maybe I'm just another fool in a rather large pool of others just like me.
 
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LdiJ

LdiJ

Senior Member
Vegs said:
Thanks everyone for the responses. I may talk to a lawyer to see if they have experience in gaining access to the actual content of text messages. I want to believe my wifes story and we (well me) have since then somewhat reconciled but I believe the content of those messages will allow me to actually move forward whichever way that may be.

As bad timed as SingleAZdad's comment "Once a cheater..." was, I will always have that in the back of my mind because I too believe that "cheating is first emotional before it is ever physical"...I honestly do.

Being an analyst at profession and heart, I too cannot poke any holes in the comment, "if you need to resort to these methods, is there really a relationship there to save?" However, I have a lot to lose... A marriage of 12 years, two wonderful kids (one 12 and the other 3), a house, investments, physical and emmotional investments...

Maybe one of those Magic 8-Ball's would have the answers or maybe I'm just another fool in a rather large pool of others just like me.
Click to expand...
I honestly think its unlikely that any record of the actual text messages exists. Just like the company cannot record the contents of phone calls, I don't think that they can record the content of text messages either.

I understand why you would want to know, but I think that you are spinning your wheels.
 
N

nextwife

Senior Member
LdiJ said:
I honestly think its unlikely that any record of the actual text messages exists. Just like the company cannot record the contents of phone calls, I don't think that they can record the content of text messages either.

I understand why you would want to know, but I think that you are spinning your wheels.
Click to expand...

Agreed. I'm fairly certain that there is no log of CONTENT of texting.
 
J

jacob333

Member
have you checked to see if they are talking on the internet?
You can see history of messages on there if she hasn't erased it yet. Or even look at all history for other evidence of her cheating.
i just caught my wife having an online affair, and seen most of her messages, then found out she met him at a hotel...all by looking thru history.
 
S

Silverplum

Senior Member
The sole ground for divorce in Colorado is irretrievable breakdown of the marriage.

You don't have to "prove" anything. Texts, emails, etc. don't matter. Don't waste your time and efforts.
 
W

wichitafalls1

Member
your going to drive yourself crazy wanting to know what they said to each other, and that the real reason you want to see them. the copy will not have the actually words sent between the two. you can look or ask for a copy of your statements for time and dates. but like someone said earlier, cheating starts before physical contact. i know i searched and begged for some written proof, but you already have the proof, maybe just don't want to face it yet. no legal advice, just emotional.
 
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