She wants the Divorce and I paying for it

What is the name of your state? N.J

I have been married for 4 years but have been living together 10. For the last 9 years I have been the sole provider for my family as my wife was a stay home mom for our 2 children. I have just paid for her secondary schooling to become a Medical Assistant. She now wants a divorce so she can live her life. She plans on taking the kids. We currently still reside in the same home,same bed even but there's no other interaction. My friend says she's going to get the house and the good car due to the fact that the judge is going to give the kids (9 & 6) to her. I only make 35K a year and I can't afford to find any legal help with out severely impacting the lively hood of my kids. Most laywers charging $250 and up for a consult. Can any one help with ideas or place to get inexpensive legal advice?

First of all, unless your friend is a lawyer, don't get your legal advice from him or her.

It sounds like the relationship is fairly amicable at this point. Are you and your wife able to have a reasonable discussion of how a split would work? Does she have a job yet?

My thought would be that if she wants a divorce so she can live her life, perhaps she should get a job and an apartment and the kids can remain in the marital home with you. That may or may not be agreeable, or feasible.

You should get a lawyer as soon as possible. If I were you, I would spend the money on a medium-priced, experienced family law attorney for a consultation so you can find out exactly what you are facing legally.

snoop-bc said:

What is the name of your state? N.J

I have been married for 4 years but have been living together 10. For the last 9 years I have been the sole provider for my family as my wife was a stay home mom for our 2 children. I have just paid for her secondary schooling to become a Medical Assistant. She now wants a divorce so she can live her life. She plans on taking the kids. We currently still reside in the same home,same bed even but there's no other interaction. My friend says she's going to get the house and the good car due to the fact that the judge is going to give the kids (9 & 6) to her. I only make 35K a year and I can't afford to find any legal help with out severely impacting the lively hood of my kids. Most laywers charging $250 and up for a consult. Can any one help with ideas or place to get inexpensive legal advice?

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You can't afford NOT to get an attorney. If you don't have the money, consider borrowing it or begging from someone. Eliminate all unnecessary expenses. The expense is temporary, but the results last a lifetime, so do it right. If you really can't find the money, check with:
- Legal aid (although you probably make too much)
- Your employee benefits package. Some companies offer low cost or free legal aid.
- Local law schools may be able to help

50:50 joint legal and physical custody is becoming more common. Unless there's a major problem in your background, you have a good chance of getting that since you're both apparently going to be working in the same area.

As for the house and everything else, she's going to get half. That means that you're either going to have to sell the house or one of you will have to buy the other one out (using other assets in exchange).

I just want to say thanks you guys are great in here.

I'll try to find a reasonably priced lawyer tomorrow