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Questions About Separation/Divorce

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SadInNC

Junior Member
What is the name of your state? North Carolina

So my marriage is ending. I'm considering this because my husband has now put his hands on me twice, once when pregnant he pulled me by the hair hard because I slammed his car door and recently he yelled at me because he thought I gave him an attitude and he shoved me hard. I'm afraid he'll hit me next.

We've been together for 3 1/2 years, married for 1 year and 1 month. I became a stay at home mom after our daughter was born on October 3, 2007. The cars are in his name, the house is in our name and pretty much everything in the house is in both our names.

Here are my questions:
Would there be grounds for any kind of spousal support after only 1 year of marriage?
Can he take my daughter just because he's working and I'm not?
Will he get to have unsupervised visits with our daughter even if I bring up the physical abuse?
How does the splitting of assets work exactly?
Would I get anything for the house if I didn't want to stay in it even though I did put money into paying for it when I was working?
Would I get a car that technically he's been paying for since I'm not working even though the payment comes out of the joint account and I make the payments and I'm listed as the primary driver on the insurance?

I'm currently looking for a lawyer that will do a free consultation since I have no money. Just wondering how much can go wrong with this. I want to try counseling before doing this but he doesn't so not sure what's going to happen. Thank you for any answers.
 


Silverplum

Senior Member
What is the name of your state? North Carolina

So my marriage is ending. I'm considering this because my husband has now put his hands on me twice, once when pregnant he pulled me by the hair hard because I slammed his car door and recently he yelled at me because he thought I gave him an attitude and he shoved me hard. I'm afraid he'll hit me next.

We've been together for 3 1/2 years, married for 1 year and 1 month. I became a stay at home mom after our daughter was born on October 3, 2007. The cars are in his name, the house is in our name and pretty much everything in the house is in both our names.

Here are my questions:
Would there be grounds for any kind of spousal support after only 1 year of marriage?
No.
SadInNC said:
Can he take my daughter just because he's working and I'm not?
Not for that reason alone, no.
You both are her parents. It's OUR daughter. You both have equal rights to her.
SadInNC said:
Will he get to have unsupervised visits with our daughter even if I bring up the physical abuse?
Not the way you've described, no. Not at all.
SadInNC said:
How does the splitting of assets work exactly?
Too complicated to do on a MB. Basically: you SPLIT them. You know, pretty much halvsies.
SadInNC said:
Would I get anything for the house if I didn't want to stay in it even though I did put money into paying for it when I was working?
Depends upon how things shake out. It's a marital asset, apparently, so you would likely get some credit for your share in the SPLITTING process.
SadInNC said:
Would I get a car that technically he's been paying for since I'm not working even though the payment comes out of the joint account and I make the payments and I'm listed as the primary driver on the insurance?
See previous answer.
 

SadInNC

Junior Member
Thank you Silverplum. You pretty much said everything I already knew but needed to hear from someone else.

Does anyone know how child support works? I want to make sure I get enough to help will food, bills and daycare since I'll have to go back to work if/when we separate and we're on our own. I didn't know if it was a percentage by state or based on something else. Thank you.
 

Silverplum

Senior Member
Silverplum...do you mean that she actually has enough to request and be granted supervised visits? It doesn't appear that she has enough of a reason to get supervised visitation granted :confused:
I meant, no, she has no grounds at all for supervised visits to my knowlege, based upon what she has written.

Sorry for the confusion -- I see now she wrote "UNsupervised," and I read "supervised."
 
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Silverplum

Senior Member
Thank you Silverplum. You pretty much said everything I already knew but needed to hear from someone else.

Does anyone know how child support works? I want to make sure I get enough to help will food, bills and daycare since I'll have to go back to work if/when we separate and we're on our own. I didn't know if it was a percentage by state or based on something else. Thank you.
You're welcome. :)

Don't count on child support as your mainstay. You'll need to get a job to support yourself and your child, if you get primary custody or even 50/50. Your H will not be responsible to support you, only to provide a portion of your child's care. Including daycare and health insurance.

NC's CS is calculated via the income shares model on gross income. Meaning, both incomes of the parents are used in the calculations, in weights according to who makes more/less/etc.
Start here:
http://ocse.acf.hhs.gov/ext/irg/sps/report.cfm?State=NC

There's lots of CS info on the internet. Stick with NC: other states are irrelevant and will only serve to confuse you.
 

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