Cancelled wedding

What is the name of your state? Mississippi

I was getting married and have now called off the wedding. During the course of our engagement, my fiance did not have a job and I spent a lot of money on him. His dad gave us a wedding gift to finish paying for our honeymoon trip to Disneyworld because my ex fiance could not finish paying his half.

Now that we are broken up, My daughter and I still plan to go (she was always on the reservation and was going) but his dad says that I owe him the money back for what he gave us as a wedding gift since we're not getting married anymore. Now, I explained to my ex that he can show up on the day we check in and I will gladly give him his tickets once we are checked in, but I doubt he has the money to get there anyway because he was planning on me paying for the transportation. (It's a trip to Disneyworld that my daughter and I had already planned to take before he and I were engaged).

Can I be held to repay the money he placed in my bank account (even after asking them both not to place the money in my bank account - he had access to the account and did anyway)? Also, if I'm being asked to repay a gift, should he be responsible for all the gifts I gave him (clothes, money, gas, entertainment) as well as being responsible for half of the wedding costs I incurred? I told him I wanted to just walk away and both of us go our separate ways, but they are insisting that I should repay this money that was placed on our honeymoon trip as a wedding gift. So basically, I would be out the money I have spent on him all these months, the money I've spent for wedding preparations as well as the money they are wanting back from the gift without him having to repay anything. I actually don't want anything from him, but if they insist that I pay back the money placed on the trip, do I have any recourse for regaining the money I've spent?

I hope that is not all convoluted and makes sense.What is the name of your state?

Can I be held to repay the money he placed in my bank account (even after asking them both not to place the money in my bank account - he had access to the account and did anyway)? Also, if I'm being asked to repay a gift, should he be responsible for all the gifts I gave him (clothes, money, gas, entertainment) as well as being responsible for half of the wedding costs I incurred? I told him I wanted to just walk away and both of us go our separate ways, but they are insisting that I should repay this money that was placed on our honeymoon trip as a wedding gift. So basically, I would be out the money I have spent on him all these months, the money I've spent for wedding preparations as well as the money they are wanting back from the gift without him having to repay anything. I actually don't want anything from him, but if they insist that I pay back the money placed on the trip, do I have any recourse for regaining the money I've spent?

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those wedding gifts were not just gifts. They were gifts predicated upon an event (wedding) which is not going to take place so yes, you do owe the old guy the money. The wedding expenses would be equally born by you and the former fiance.

the other items you gave him are not wedding gifts but merely gifts to a paramour. Not recoverable.

Its real nice of you to be willing to simply walk away when you apparently would profit from such an arrangement. Pay up and find some other means to pay for your trip.

So, I'm responsible for paying the money back placed on the trip to his dad. But he should be responsible for paying for half of the wedding expenses that I've paid also?

Also, if he refuses to go on the trip after I've told him he can meet us there and receive his tickets and do as he wishes with them, I'm still accountable? Because he first said he wasn't worried about it and didn't want anything back, but then his dad got involved, of course, and now it's a big mess.

I just wanted to add, he only paid a small portion of the trip, which was the last remaining payment and balance. I had already paid for most of the trip and it boils down more to the princple and nerve of them asking as opposed to the actual cost and me giving him back the money. He's also asked for the ring back, which I've been assured since it was given to me as a gift on Valentines Day, that I do NOT have to return. If it goes to small claims, then I will just sell the ring and use that money to pay anything that I may incur. tit for tat I guess.

I would be cautious about the ring as well. Although it was given on Valentine's day, it too was a gift in anticipation of the wedding. I could see it going either way on that one. The judge would have to make that call.

You may have to decide if it was a Valentine's day gift or an engagement ring. I suspect it was an engagement ring and he just happened to propose to you on Valentines day because it was such a sweet and romantic thing to do.

It really just sounds like you want an argument on principle rather than really disagreeing with who should end up with the money.

If that is the case, then best of luck to you because that is an arguement you can have with them. Apparently you don't really want things to be over.

to make everything easier: draw up all the expenses paid by you for the wedding (deposits and so forth) also on a separate piece of paper draw up what was given as a gift for the trip. talk to the x-father-in-law and present it to him. saying that son is responsible for 1/2 these bills associated with the wedding and see if he will let you deduct it from the gift he gave you for the trip. as far as anything you bought for the x while you were together would be your responsibility and in very very rare cases would anyone give you credit or money back on that.

momm2500 said:

to make everything easier: draw up all the expenses paid by you for the wedding (deposits and so forth) also on a separate piece of paper draw up what was given as a gift for the trip. talk to the x-father-in-law and present it to him. saying that son is responsible for 1/2 these bills associated with the wedding and see if he will let you deduct it from the gift he gave you for the trip. as far as anything you bought for the x while you were together would be your responsibility and in very very rare cases would anyone give you credit or money back on that.

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good idea but dad could still cause problems. Since the money is his and if he wants to give the girl a real hassle, he can simply argue that it is not his sons money and that is a seperate issue between the two of them, but worth a shot.

The man is NOT responsible for reimbursing you for any of your wedding expenses--it's a wonder that your fiancee and her family didn't shell out any money for these expenses since it's usually the bride's family who willingly pays to help daughter make arrangements! Aren't you getting partial refunds from some of the vendors or were all of the deposits non-refundable?

Show good faith--if you can't afford to pay back all of the money now, then sign an agreement or promissory note to make monthly installment payments until the full amount is repaid. How much were you "gifted" by him?