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Reporting an assault incident

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keysersoze

Junior Member
What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Minnesota

Three years ago I found out an ex-boyfriend of mine was cheating on me. When I found out I was so angry I slapped him across the face.

Even though we're not dating anymore we managed to work through that, and now we're the best of friends. However, this morning we got into a serious fight, he lost his temper and walloped me a bunch of times, leaving a really bad bruise on my arm.

I've thought about reporting the incident, and I still haven't decided if I'm going to or not (it really just doesn't seem worth the time and energy). However, he says I don't have a case because I slapped him a few years ago. In terms of assault, are the eyes of the law different when it comes to men and women?
 


fairisfair

Senior Member
no, the eyes of the law do not recognize gender.

he "whalloped you a couple of times" ??? what in the hell are you waiting for??

and he should have reported you as well, years ago.

You are both abusers.
 

keysersoze

Junior Member
"he "whalloped you a couple of times" ??? what in the hell are you waiting for??"

Well, I was hoping I could go to this forum and get simple, professional legal advice, not to be chastised for a mistake I made when I was seventeen.

As for what I'm waiting for? I'm deciding whether it'd be better it to report it and spend a year entangled in the legal system or to just cut him out of my life.

Also, could what I did three years ago have any effect on my case against him?

I know what I did was wrong. I was under the impression at the time that it's okay for a woman to slap a man under certain circumstances. Please don't give me a lecture.
 
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fairisfair

Senior Member
"he "whalloped you a couple of times" ??? what in the hell are you waiting for??"

Well, I was hoping I could go to this forum and get simple, professional legal advice, not to be chastised for a mistake I made when I was seventeen.

As for what I'm waiting for? I'm deciding whether it'd be better it to report it and spend a year entangled in the legal system or to just cut him out of my life.

Also, could what I did three years ago have any effect on my case against him?

I know what I did was wrong. I was under the impression at the time that it's okay for a woman to slap a man under certain circumstances. Please don't give me a lecture.

Really??? Reallllly??? REALLY??? and just what might those "circumstances" be??? You know...the ones that make it okey dokey to assault another person?

If you are looking for someone to say that what you did is okay, and what he did is simply horrible, you have come to the wrong place.. Although there is one poster here who has a fee chart available for those who simply wish to be told what they want to hear.

Here is your legal advice. Report the assault. Here is his legal advice. Report the assault.

Although it is probably too late for him.
 

keysersoze

Junior Member
"If you are looking for someone to say that what you did is okay, and what he did is simply horrible, you have come to the wrong place.. Although there is one poster here who has a fee chart available for those who simply wish to be told what they want to hear."

Jesus that is NOT what I was asking for. I said I know what I did was wrong. I just wanted some straight-up advice, no moralizing. Leave the repetent soul-searching to me, and me alone. Thanks.
 
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fairisfair

Senior Member
"If you are looking for someone to say that what you did is okay, and what he did is simply horrible, you have come to the wrong place.. Although there is one poster here who has a fee chart available for those who simply wish to be told what they want to hear."

Jesus that is NOT what I was asking for. I said I know what I did was wrong. I just wanted some straight-up advice, no moralizing. Leave the repetent soul-searching to me, and me alone. Thanks.
Gee, shall we leave it to you NOW??

Or maybe in a couple of years, when he loses his temper with some other woman and beats her to death?

or when you decide that this time it is okay to just hit someone with a bat.

Gimme a break.

And some of our more religious posters will take GREAT OFFENSE at your use of their Lord's name in that manner....consider yourself warned.:mad:
 

keysersoze

Junior Member
I know there isn't a ton of leeway in the eyes of the law, but I have a hunch beating someone to a pulp with a baseball bat is considered a higher degree of assault than slapping a cheating lover. Not that I'm trying to come up with excuses for my behavior, but your example was pretty extreme.

I'm sorry for taking the Lord's name in vain. This is my first time posting I'm not sure what the etiquette of these boards are.

Can someone less reactionary just give me an answer? Someone who will behave like a member of the legal community and not a fire-and-brimstone breathing preacher?
 
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Tallrat

Member
What happened 3 yrs ago has no bearing on what just happened. Go file for protection and end the relationship. The only reason to hit someone is if you are protecting yourself or someone else. So go file, they won't care what happened 3 yrs ago.
 

outonbail

Senior Member
After you file a report with the police, do us all one big favor.

Wait until your friend is charged with assault. About three or four days before he is scheduled to appear in court to answer to the charges, come on back and ask us how you go about having the charges dropped.

Tell us that you were pushing his buttons and that his walloping you, was really your fault.
You can throw in a few other character references, like he's really a nice guy and he's been under a lot of pressure because he's taking care of a dying relative and that he's never done anything like this before.

After all, restraining/no contact orders and in fact most all court orders, are something that should really be used at our convenience, or at least as a control tool we can hang over someone's head whenever we feel the need,,,,,, ;)
 

fairisfair

Senior Member
Thank You!!!
abusers statistically escalate their abuse.

you both belong to that category.

Gee....you got the same advice only said in a pretty little way that you liked better.

how huggly wuggly for you.:rolleyes:

hope the judge is wearing pinky furry booties for ya.... ROTFLMAO
 

fairisfair

Senior Member
After you file a report with the police, do us all one big favor.

Wait until your friend is charged with assault. About three or four days before he is scheduled to appear in court to answer to the charges, come on back and ask us how you go about having the charges dropped.

Tell us that you were pushing his buttons and that his walloping you, was really your fault.
You can throw in a few other character references, like he's really a nice guy and he's been under a lot of pressure because he's taking care of a dying relative and that he's never done anything like this before.

After all, restraining/no contact orders and in fact most all court orders, are something that should really be used at our convenience, or at least as a control tool we can hang over someone's head whenever we feel the need,,,,,, ;)
oh OOB, you are just soooooo mean!!!! :p
 

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