Doing your own will and custody of children

What is the name of your state (only U.S. law)? Indiana

I hope this is in the proper forum, if not, I apologize and will move it.

My husband lost his job when the factory closed, so we are limited on funds. I was wondering if there is any way we can create a binding will on our own, or must we see an attorney for this? We don't have much, just the contents of our home, and several vehicles, all paid off.

My second question is about our children. We have six children, and do not want custody to go to anyone in our family. My parents would respect our values, but are not in good health and do not make very much money. None of my husband's family respect our values at all, and we absolutely do not want any of them raising our children. I have a very dear friend, whom we would want to raise them if something were to happen to us, they love them as they do their own, have the same values, and have told us they would gladly take them. Is there a way we could make that future certain for our children if something were to happen to us? Would a will be enough, and would there be a way to keep my in laws from fighting it, or winning if they decide to fight it (we are fairly certain someone in his family, or all of them, would try).

Thank you so much for any help!
NaomiWhat is the name of your state (only U.S. law)?

many states have a separate document called "appointment of guardian".

here is texas.
Declaration of Guardian Form (for Minor Children)

you may have to petition the court in indiana. you need to find out for sure. here is an indiana document.
www.mccsc.edu/~mcsocwrk/Guardianship Forms.doc

do you own the home ? if so, that is a substantial amount in and of itself.

you dont have to go to an attorney to make it legal, but you need to know what you are doing. it doesnt pay to take shortcuts and make possible problems later down the road.

some states allow you to put beneficiaries on vehicles.

if you own the home, i would place it in trust, so as to avoid probate on that asset.

Thank you, at least this gives me a place to start working on this. We do not own our home, we are renting at the moment, but we are hoping to buy within the next year or so, and of course then that would have to be changed. With the vehicles, I would rather will those to also go to my friends that would be guardian, so they would be able to use them or sell them as they see fit.

Thanks for the information, i will go read those now!
Naomi

More questions?

Ok, so my husband and I were talking about this, and how would you go about petitioning the courts, and what all would that involve? Would other family members have to testify? Would we have to prove why we see them as unfit? I can't see why they would, since they are our children and we should be able to choose how we want them raised. The main person we see as being a threat is my father in law, and he works in the system (he does home visits for the state as a child and family counselor) and has testified in numerous court cases for the state, but he's the biggest one we DON'T want having an influence. So, would it be likely we would have a hard time proving our case for not letting them have custody?

Thanks!
Naomi

OP, please ignore TrustUser. The advice is wrong.

TrustUser said:

many states have a separate document called "appointment of guardian".

here is texas.
Declaration of Guardian Form (for Minor Children)

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The last time I checked, Texas is not part of Indiana, therefore Texas laws don't apply.

you may have to petition the court in indiana. you need to find out for sure.

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That part is actually correct!

here is an indiana document.
www.mccsc.edu/~mcsocwrk/Guardianship Forms.doc

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That's not for use in case of death of a parent. It's so that a person, not the parent, can enroll the child in school.

do you own the home ? if so, that is a substantial amount in and of itself.

you dont have to go to an attorney to make it legal, but you need to know what you are doing. it doesnt pay to take shortcuts and make possible problems later down the road.

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It would be foolish not to use an attorney. THis is not something to mess up. See an attorney about establishing a standby guardianship.

indiana filer,

get off your high horse.

i told her that many states have appointment of guardians, gave her an example, and told her to look up the laws in indiana. pretty darn good advice.

if you want to improve upon that because you are familiar with indiana, by all means - what i had hoped would happen.

you did not need to interject any comment back at me. i wont tell the op to ignore you, but you can tone down your arrogance. it is neither needed nor appreciated.

TrustUser said:

indiana filer,

get off your high horse.

i told her that many states have appointment of guardians, gave her an example, and told her to look up the laws in indiana. pretty darn good advice.

if you want to improve upon that because you are familiar with indiana, by all means - what i had hoped would happen.

you did not need to interject any comment back at me. i wont tell the op to ignore you, but you can tone down your arrogance. it is neither needed nor appreciated.

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Hi Trustuser,

We elders (aka seniors who have been here quite a while) get annoyed when young'ns post incorrect information, which you did.

Even though folks can nominate or declare who they want for their children and even for oneself to be appointed guardian, those papers don't automatically make one a guardian until a judge signs a court order stating so.

In this case, the OP wants to ensure that the children go directly to who he/she has designated prior to a judge signing a court order for the guardianship. A standby guardian is exactly what is needed drafted by an attorney, just as Indiana stated.

hi blondie,

i did not tell the op that this is how things were done in indiana.

i told him that appointments of guardian are common documents in some states, and gave him an example of one. they are also used in california.

i gave him an indiana document, and i then told him to look up the laws in indiana, to see what applies there. i suspected that an appointment of guardian did not apply in indiana, since i could not find one with that state, like i could with a lot of other states.

i stick by what i said.

i never said that indiana filer was wrong. quite the contrary. i am glad that someone was able to give the op something more concrete about the state of indiana.

i gave him at least a starting point, with some things to look at. i never know who is gonna post. if indiana filer would have posted first, then i would not have bothered to post anything.

i guess we will just have to disagree, regarding this topic.

but then life would be boring if everyone agreed all the time.

TrustUser said:

hi blondie,

i did not tell the op that this is how things were done in indiana.

i told him that appointments of guardian are common documents in some states, and gave him an example of one. they are also used in california.

i gave him an indiana document, and i then told him to look up the laws in indiana, to see what applies there. i suspected that an appointment of guardian did not apply in indiana, since i could not find one with that state, like i could with a lot of other states.

i stick by what i said.

i never said that indiana filer was wrong. quite the contrary. i am glad that someone was able to give the op something more concrete about the state of indiana.

i gave him at least a starting point, with some things to look at. i never know who is gonna post. if indiana filer would have posted first, then i would not have bothered to post anything.

i guess we will just have to disagree, regarding this topic.

but then life would be boring if everyone agreed all the time.

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There's a huge difference between the link(s) for the docs you provided and a standby guardian. When one doesn't know a lot about guardianships/conservatorships, it's best to pass by that thread.

No problem with agreeing to disagree.